Daughter Of Midnight - The Child Bride of Gandhi. Arun Gandhi

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СКАЧАТЬ Porbandar that he got “an early grounding in toleration for all branches of Hinduism and its sister religions” — an attitude he tried to pass on to his followers.

      At one point Kasturbai took it upon herself to warn Mohandas against spending too much time with Sheik Mehtab. Mohandas, disregarding (and possibly resenting) her advice, persisted in the friendship. That is where matters stood when the time came for Kasturbai to make another lengthy visit to Porbandar. With his wife away, Mohandas soon became Mehtab’s inseparable companion, and Mehtab became a guiding influence in his life.

      One day Mohandas confessed to his new friend that he was plagued by unreasonable fears of the dark and of creatures that came out at night. This embarrassed him, he said, because his wife had none of these fears. Kasturbai would go out in darkness where Mohandas feared to tread; she could sleep soundly, while he, lying awake, was in terror of snakes, thieves, and ghosts.

      Mehtab had an answer: eat meat. He attributed Mohandas’ timidity to vegetarianism that was a basic tenet of Vaishnava-sect followers of Vishnu. Mehtab boasted he could hold live serpents in his hand, and could defy thieves. He stated that he did not believe in ghosts — all because he, as a Muslim, could eat meat. His size, strength, and athletic prowess (he was the high school’s star runner) were all due to meat eating. This was also why the English were able to dominate Indians. Mehtab quoted the Gujarati doggerel gaining popularity among young Indians:

      Behold the mighty Englishman

      He rules the Indian small

      Because, being a meat-eater,

      He is five cubits tall.

      Mehtab informed Mohandas that many of his Hindu high school teachers were now secretly eating meat. So was his own brother, Karsandas.

      Mohandas had long since begun to question the validity of certain Hindu practices, starting with the rigidities of the caste system. As a little boy he had seen Uka clean the bucket latrines at the Gandhi house and once asked his mother why Uka was considered Untouchable. Why was it believed that their very shadows could contaminate, and anyone who so much as brushed against them had to be purified by an immediate bath?

      Putliba had, momentarily, eased her son’s mind by explaining that it wasn’t always necessary to perform ablutions after coming into contact with an Untouchable; if one touched someone from another religion, a Muslim perhaps, the pollution could be harmlessly transferred. Later on, in a spirit of pre-adolescent rebellion, Mohandas and one of his young cousins had challenged a lesser prohibition of the Vaishnava faith. Secretly retrieving cigarette butts discarded by a transgressing uncle, they had briefly (and unhappily) tried smoking.

      More recently, Mohandas had stopped going to temple — the ostentatious glitter and pomp had never appealed to him. What did such outward displays of excessive wealth have to do with inner spiritual values? He had grown increasingly skeptical about all religiously prescribed dogma, and was secretly beginning to regard himself as an atheist.

      After due consideration of his friend Mehtab’s urging, Mohandas decided that, for him, meat eating posed no moral problems except for the deception involved. His parents, of course, could never know. If meat eating would make him strong and daring, it was an experiment worth trying. And as part of a reform that could help free India, it was a patriotic duty to be performed.

      His first taste of meat — a feast of goat’s meat and baker’s bread (another first) which was supplied by Mehtab and eaten in privacy on a secluded riverbank on the outskirts of town made Mohandas sick. He had nightmares that night. But remorse soon faded when he reminded himself of his duty to grow stronger. More secret feasts followed, even a few visits to restaurants where meat dishes were served. By the time Kasturbai returned to Rajkot, Mohandas had actually acquired a taste for meat dishes. The experiment had become an established habit.

      Kasturbai soon realised that her husband, once again, had changed. His attempts to teach her to read and write were forgotten. They seldom talked, even at night. Upon reaching their room, they went straight to bed — in the dark. Mohandas made it a point now to turn off the nightlight. He left for school early, arrived home late, and ate little for dinner, complaining of “digestive” problems. His parents accepted the explanation. But it did not ring true to Kasturbai.

      Only gradually, and with horror, did she allow herself to suspect the most likely reason for this latest transformation in her husband. Mohandas had become a meat eater!

      Kasturbai had been born and bred a Vaishnava Hindu, and abhorrence of meat eating was stronger among the Vaishnavas. Most Vaishnava Hindus had absorbed many of the basic teachings of Jainism. To them, therefore, the eating of meat was tantamount to eating human flesh.

      If Mohandas had now become a meat-eater, she was certain that Sheik Mehtab was the most likely instigator of such wickedness. Living in close proximity with him, Kasturbai became more convinced that this was the horrifying truth. But what could she do about it? She could not now confront Mohandas with her new suspicions. She certainly could not discuss the matter with Putliba, and it would be improper to speak of it with her sisters-in-law. If Mohandas wanted to eat meat, Kasturbai could not stop him. All she could do was keep her silence and pray.

      Somehow, her prayers were answered.

      Mohandas’ experiment with meat eating stretched out over a full year. To his disappointment, it added not a single cubit to his size but added immensely to his guilt. My grandfather was no doubt beginning to realise that my grandmother knew and understood him better than anyone else. In the end, his guilt overcame his enthusiasm for “food reform”. He could not live with the deception and decided to confess his guilt to his ailing father. It took him a while to muster the courage. He wrote a letter and one day, when his father was lying in bed alone, handed it over to him.

      On reading his son’s confession his father cried and so did Mohandas. They embraced, his father forgave him and Mohandas kept his vow to shun meat for ever.

      Mohandas’ friendship with Mehtab had meanwhile cast another shadow over his relationship with his wife. Though Kasturbai was unaware of it, Mohandas sometimes discussed with Mehtab his uncertainties about their intimate marital relations. His own feelings of desire for his young wife were constant and intense. Though she seemed to return his love with a tender affection, he sometimes expected her to be more demonstrative.

      One day, talking to Mehtab, Mohandas wondered aloud whether Kasturbai was more or less responsive in lovemaking than other women were. With his own lack of experience, he had no way of knowing. Mehtab, a self-proclaimed “expert” in these matters, had an answer — as usual. It was more unnerving than helpful.

      “Don’t worry,” he said. “Women are often very timid about such things; or, perhaps, she has someone else she likes better than you.”

      That night Kasturbai had to face a flood of angry questions and accusations about her fidelity — she could hardly believe what Mohandas was saying. The nights that followed were the same. It was a period of lonely emotional torment for her. She knew who was behind this mischief, but was helpless to defend herself. And there was no one to whom she could turn for help or counsel.

      There was worse to come.

      Mehtab’s next suggestion was that Mohandas would probably find it interesting to visit a brothel where he could learn about other women. Mehtab knew just the place. He offered to make all the arrangements, even pay the bill in advance. Mohandas allowed himself to be persuaded, but the outcome was disastrous. The ardent but jealous husband, once in the presence of a woman other than the wife to whom he had sworn eternal fidelity, was unable to perform.

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