Natboff! One Million Years of Stupidity. Andy Stanton

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СКАЧАТЬ HAR DISGUSSIG,’ say

      Natboff.

      Natboff spit har out everwher.

      Natboff try eatig cav.

      No gud.

      Evencherlee Wolf come bak wiv frends.

      ‘LOOK AT MITY FRENDS,’ Wolf say

      prowdly.

      ‘MITY ANT!

      ‘MITY SPIDA!

      ‘MITY LEEF!’

      ‘FRENDS NOT LOOK SO MITY,’

      say Natboff. ‘NATBOFF THURT WOLF’S

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      FRENDS BE MITY BEAR! MITY MAMMOF!

      MITY SABE-TOOTH TIGGER!’

      ‘SORY,’ say Wolf. ‘WOLF NOT KNO

      THOSE GUYS. WOLF ONLY KNO MITY

      ANT! MITY SPIDA! MITY LEEF!’

      ‘ME CAN DO THIRTY PRES-UPS,’ say

      Mity Leef.

      ‘OK,’ say Natboff. ‘IT HAV TO DO. WAT

      THE PLAN?’

      ‘CHUNKA LIV IN FORESS WIV SALLY

      NOW,’ say Mity Spida. ‘SO WE GOT TO

      GO TO FORESS. THEN WE SNEEK UP ON

      CHUNKA.’

      ‘IS GUD START TO PLAN,’ say Natboff.

      ‘BUT WAT NEX?’

      ‘MITY ANT JUMP ON CHUNKA

      LEGG AN LICK HIM,’ say Mity Spida.

      ‘THEN MITY SPIDA (THAT ME) TIKLE

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      CHUNKA FOOT. THEN WOLF BITE OFF

       CHUNKA FACE. NATBOFF GET SALLY

       BACK, EESY PEESY LEMMO SQUEE!’

      ‘MITY SPIDA GUD AT PLAN!’ say

       Natboff. ‘MABBE THIS WURK AFTEH AL.

       BUT WAT ABOU MITY LEEF? EVERWUN

       ELSE DO STUF IN PLAN BUT MITY LEEF

       DO NUTHIN.’

      ‘ME DO PRES-UPS TO DISTRAC

       CHUNKA,’ say Mity Leef, flexig mussels.

      ‘IT GUDDEST PLAN OF AL TIMM!’ say Wolf. ‘LET DO DISCO TO SELEBRAT.’

      Natboff, Wolf, Mity Ant, Mity Spida an Mity Leef do disco.

      Gess hoo besst at disco dancc? Mity Ant.

      Mity Ant win disco prize!

      ‘DISCO FUN,’ say Natboff. ‘BUT NOW

       IT TIMM FOR PUT PLAN INTO ACSHUN.

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      WICH WAY FORESS?’

      Mity Leef step forwar.

      ‘ME WAS BORN IN FORESS,’ say Mity Leef, ‘SO ME KNO EXAC WHER IT IS. FOLLO LEEF!’

      ‘NATBOFF HAD DOUTS ABOU MITY LEEF TO BEGIN WIV,’ say Natboff, ‘BUT NOW HE GROWIG ON ME.’

      ‘HA HA,’ say Mity Ant. ‘NATBOFF MAKK BIG FUNNEH!’

      ‘DISCO TO SELEBRAT?’ say Wolf hopfully.

      ‘MABBE LATEH,’ say Natboff.

      AL WOLF WANT TO DO IS DISCO, thinnk Natboff. ME GETTIG PRETY SICK

      OF WOLF. BUT ME NOT TELL WOLF OUT

      LOUD BECOS WOLF NATBOFF FREND,

      AN ME NOT WANT TO HURT WOLF

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      FEELIG.

      (Natboff mite be cavma but Natboff a

      sensitif sort of fello.)

      Anyweh. Afteh al this, Natboff an gang

      set off wiv Mity Leef leedig way. Evencherlee

      com to foress.

      Gess hoo in middel of foress tryig to

      makk baby cavmas? It Chunka an Sally, jus as

      Natboff susspecced!

      ‘YOU GUYS HIDDE IN BUSH,’

      say Natboff to anima an plannt chums.

      ‘NATBOFF GONNA DO IT CRAFTY

      STILE!’

      Natboff step forwar crafty stile to wher

      Chunka an Sally busy tryig to makk baby

      cavmas.

      ‘HEY CHUNKA, HEY SALLY,’ say

      Natboff.

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      ‘HEY NATBOFF,’ say Chunka. ‘GO

      AWAY, WE IN THE MIDDEL OF STUF.’

      ‘NATBOFF NOT COM AL THIS WAY

       TO BE TALK TO LIKK THAT,’ say Natboff.

       ‘NATBOFF COM TO GET SALLY BAK.’

      ‘O YEAH?’ say Chunka. ‘HOW

       NATBOFF GONNA DO THAT? CHUNKA

       SO BIG AN HARY, NATBOFF GOT NO

       CHANSE.’

      ‘NATBOFF GOT CHUMS,’ say Natboff.

      Natboff giv the secre comman.

      Imedialy Mity Leef jump out of bush an

       do pres-ups.

      Chunka can harly beleev eyes!

      Wile Chunka distracced by Mity Leef,

      Mity Ant jump out an lick Chunka legg!

      Wile СКАЧАТЬ