Walking Behind Schizophrenic Eyes. Perry Ritthaler

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      I hate living under government surveillance implanted in my glasses seamlessly programming the voices in my brain. I feel like a small creature on a microscope slide sitting under a microscope. I think the only time my glasses do not work is when it is cloudy outside; and the satellite signal is interrupted by the clouds in the sky.

      The government can understand even more about my brain after they have recorded my eye pattern movements.

      I feel mentally broken; like a human lab rat being dissected alive by computer technology.

      So for now; cloudy days make me happy because I have privacy; and the grey skies make me feel sad when I miss the Florida sunshine. For many days when I close my eyes tears quietly fall off my face.

      I hate it when the government can see me psychologically broken this way.

      I have had fifty hours of hand signals on the bus ride; and my brain feels like a human punching bag. My brain is slowly roasted by angry emotions burning the government hatred thought process evolving deep inside my brain.

      The government voices in my brain have turned into the devil taunting me; systematically mentally torturing me; and this mental conditioning process is naturally encouraging me to act more aggressive and violent.

      I hate it when the government reads my mind; and tells me what to think. I can trust no one because the government is so well connected; and too big to fight alone.

      I fantasize about my revenge that will come one day when I seamlessly haunt the government; and build an invisible global army with a seamless invisible weapons system. In my fantasy I am the lone wolf with a covert weapons system named “The Quantum Energy Star Wars System”.

      I can see the Canadian border; and my voices tell me the information in my brain is classified; so I will never be allowed to leave the USA.

      My heart races faster and faster because I am afraid the bus driver is going to turn the bus around any second.

      Finally when the bus stops two government agents in uniforms board the bus asking everyone for papers; and when both government agents locate me they say they have a few questions to ask me; and both escort me into the border office for questioning.

      I know the government is going to serve me with some legal paper scam designed to get me to stay in the USA. I watch the border guard’s type into their computers; and then one of them tells me I have been away from Canada for over two years without returning to Canada.

      My hands are shaking from the stress combined with the lack of marijuana in my body. I am sweating under my arms and on my forehead.

      I try to look as healthy and clean as I can. I just hope they do not have the security clearance to read my files on my government work in Florida.

      I need my marijuana similar to how a plant needs sunlight; and without my weed my thought patterns are scrambled in my brain.

      My wild eyes look around the room; and I wonder if these men think I am a terrorist. I shake even more as my thoughts in my brain build momentum to make a run for it. Even the voices in my head tell me if I do not run soon I will be behind bars for a very long time.

      I hate this idea so I scream deep inside my brain; yelling at my voices to shut up before everyone involved can hear what we say.

      After a ten minute wait the border guards looked through the window; and returned into the room where I am locked away. The government agent told me he wanted to know more about me.

      Question after question; questioning me about where I lived; and who my friends were in the USA; and how I created my money.

      My voices helped me over and over answer the questions; and I wondered why they were helping me cross the border. Finally the guard smiled at me; and for some reason he let me back into my own country.

      I have no money to my name when I arrive at the border; and according to the voices in my head someone will hand me a pile of cash for passing the spy course successfully.

      Then I hear two other voices in my head tell me you failed the course. Then a fourth voice yelled; they are going to see me served with legal papers in Canada; working as a government USA covert agent.

      I am so confused because one voice told me the United States government owed me a million dollars for all my security work; and economic work. Now the other voices; in my head tells me; they changed their mind; and decided they were not going to pay me because they did not have to; after I cross the border.

      I thought to myself you assholes are nothing more than crack head addicts; that smoked the strategy like drugs I gave them; and now refuse to pay for services rendered.

      Canada has a security division; and I think that the America government has contacted them and told them I am a covert spy in training. I feel like a fly with broken wings caught in a spider web of government political manipulation and corruption.

      Inside my mind I am afraid that more people will follow me in Canada; and keep programming my thoughts deep inside of my brain.

      Over and over; the voices tell me I have a brilliant mind worth stealing.

      When I lived in Florida; I learned all about new energy technologies that can combine with computers; I self-taught myself how to work with multiple energy sciences while writing in eight sets of computer software programs. From database management to writing in video; I can do it all.

      I think the voices I hear in my brain are mentally ill. I realize the government wants to steal my ideas; and the government will kill me if they cannot brain farm me in some kind of mental institution.

      Do they think I am so stupid; and I do understand what is happening right in front of me?

      I am afraid the government might keep me locked in a room with a television; and make me talk about economics or security cracks and battlefield strategy like they did in Florida.

      The government has already digitally farmed my brain once; and now the government knows how hard I work. I am a workaholic; and if I cannot work the boredom will drive me crazy.

      I recognize the country surroundings so I know I am getting closer to home. The weather feels cold; and the air is dry; and I find it hard to breath. The sky looks ugly and grey and nowhere near as beautiful as Florida skies.

      I miss the heat and sunshine in Florida; and the sunset setting over the ocean. When I look outside now all I can see is death and frozen landscape. All the vegetation is brown or gone; and the ground is covered in thin patches of dirty grey snow.

      Alberta in the early spring looks like a nuclear wasteland compared to Florida.

      I feel very sad and depressed; so far away from the sunshine in Florida. Tears have slowly been sliding down the sides of my face for the last hundred miles; and my bloodshot eyeballs feel like they are going to fall out of my head.

      I am cold and my thoughts inside of my mind are negative and scattered without my marijuana. My back is in constant pain. Every time I move I feel like I have three razor blades twisting into the joints in my spine.

      From my seat I can see the Calgary Greyhound bus depot. I start to collect СКАЧАТЬ