Walking Behind Schizophrenic Eyes. Perry Ritthaler

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СКАЧАТЬ will get even with the Republican government for hurting me and not paying me.

      My anger dried the tears out of my eyes; as I tried to pull myself together; then I realized Enron would collapse when I stop fixing the crisis; one solution after the other will end; and then the USA government will realize the mistake they made.

      I thought to myself it serves them right; someone took my ideas then took credit for the work; and now they must create the strategies; that rebound the economy and made the President of the USA the most powerful man on the planet.

      I walked back into Sean’s house; and I grabbed my pipe and Sean’s whiskey bottle; lit my pipe and poured myself a stiff drink.

      Sean knows how much I love Kathy; and I can see he is a concerned good friend trying to be supportive.

      I hear Sean’s garage door open.

      I still needed to talk to Sean about Kathy; so I keep talking. I feel too uncomfortable emptying my heart as Sean’s girlfriend comes into the kitchen.

      Her nickname is Cat.

      I slowly lose Sean’s attention; and I keep my thoughts of Kathy to myself. I can see that Cat is busy doing something; and then she takes off to the bedroom.

      I thanked Sean for looking after me on the Siesta key.

      Then Sean looked at me and said; that is what real friends do for each other. Sean has gambled and invested twenty thousand dollars into the marketing program; and unfortunately my business collapsed and I lost all of Sean’s investment.

      The next day is another beautiful sunny day in Florida; Sean is driving me to the greyhound bus depot in Sarasota. When we arrive at the bus depot Sean walked over to the counter and purchased me my bus ticket for Dallas Texas.

      Sean and I hug each other as we say goodbye.

      I have tears in my eyes when Sean passed me twenty dollars for my pocket. I feel like I am parting company with another brother I never had.

      I told Sean I miss my mom and dad; and if I am ever to repay him his investment I have to go to work legally in Canada. Sean is a smart man; he knows he will never see me again; after I go home to see my mom and dad in Canada.

      I have not told Sean about the government software targeting my brain; and I know that the government people behind the curtain believe I have moved into Sean’s house. I know when the government cannot find me they will start looking for me.

      I am financially broke; a mental wreck; and on the run from the most powerful government in the world. I am a mentally shattered; however I do not believe I am sick; and I hate being on the run from the government voices locked deep inside of my head.

      I just do not have any other way to get away from the government; that has some kind of a communication system located deep inside of my brain.

      I keep looking around to see if I am being followed; and several people look like they are tracking me. In fact; I am so angry at times I just want to walk up to them and start punching them.

      Unfortunately I think the government will serve me with legal papers if they catch me violent; or if I stick a knife into one of their people following me.

      The bus depot is crowded; I see no friendly faces looking at me. I know government agents have followed Sean and me to the bus terminal in Florida. I wave good bye to Sean and the two government agents in suits are watching us; as I board the Greyhound bus to Texas.

      The only seat left on the bus is beside a fat lady that must weigh over three hundred pounds; and she smells like rotted meat. I am squished into my seat; and I can feel my spine is out of joint. My back feels like it has a razor sharp knife stuck between my shoulder blades.

      As I look out my window I see two government agents standing in the bus terminal; I smile at them as the bus pulls out of the bus depot.

      Both men are speaking into cellular telephones; and they look angry. Now the government knows I am on the move; and now the government can see how serious I really am about leaving Florida. Perhaps this is the best move for the Administration looking to see loose ends vanish.

      The bus ride to Texas is forty eight hours long; and I feel like my brain is full of small razor cuts floating in a pail of salt water.

      I wonder what the government has done to my eye glasses. My brain is being challenged constantly by different voices I hear deep inside my head; telling me they read my thoughts patterns through the special lenses in my glasses.

      If I have bad thoughts about the government; someone in front of me raises their hand; and a voice tells me inside my brain that person can hear what I think.

      I wonder what the government has done with my glasses; and if that is how the voices look into the thoughts I create in my mind. I feel like a trapped wild animal; and I keep wondering how the government talks to me; or how they can read my mind?

      After thirty-six hours on the bus with no sleep I feel like my mind is spinning out of control. The pressure in my mind has made my back tense; and the muscle tension pulling my spine apart is producing tears in my eyes.

      The pain in the back of my head makes my forehead perspire; I feel like a sharp bone in my spine is coming through the skin on my back.

      I have transferred from one bus to another five times; and I want to stop paying attention to the hand signals in front of me; working with the voices deep in my mind; telling me not to look up or move and sit still.

      The government is too big to fight in my brain; and after 40 hours on this bus ride from hell; I am giving in to the voices controlling my thought process.

      Tears are rolling off my face when I scream “I no longer care if the government can read my mind”.

      Suddenly everyone on at the bus stairs at me; my voices tell me see how many people work with us.

      I want to vent my rage on a rude man sitting behind me; he keeps kicking my seat every time I scream the words “stop”.

      Finally my teary eyes fill with rage; and I turned around to look behind me.

      The man is about forty years old; and he has long black hair hanging over his shoulders. I looked into the man with my wild eyes; and he looked back terrified to me. The man had the same kind of eyes you see in a wounded wolf. The eyes in his head were mysterious and light blue.

      I whisper to the man in a deep voice; I hate your guts.

      I am not sure but I think the government has sent him to bother me or try to hurt me. I sit back in my seat; and I feel afraid to turn around in case I turn violent; then I wonder if I should strike first and attack the man behind me.

      I think the man might be crazy.

      My roller coaster ride on the way to Hell suddenly ends when I realize I have arrived in the Dallas bus depot; and everyone on the bus rushes to the door to get off the bus.

      I felt good leaving the crazy man behind me on the bus; and when I walked into the bus depot; I telephoned Sarge from a pay phone. I could hear that Sarge was happy to hear my voice on the telephone; СКАЧАТЬ