Rhoda Fleming. Complete. George Meredith

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СКАЧАТЬ that words were of no avail, he summed up expostulation and reproach in this sigh of resigned philosophy: “I am going. Let me see—I have my Temple keys?—yes! I am afraid that even when you are inclined to be gracious and look at me, I shall not, be visible to you for some days. I start for Lord Elling’s to-morrow morning at five. I meet my father there by appointment. I’m afraid we shall have to stay over Christmas. Good-bye.” He paused. “Good-bye, my dear.”

      Two or three steps nearer the door, he said, “By the way, do you want anything? Money?—do you happen to want any money? I will send a blank cheque tomorrow. I have sufficient for both of us. I shall tell the landlady to order your Christmas dinner. How about wine? There is champagne, I know, and bottled ale. Sherry? I’ll drop a letter to my wine-merchant; I think the sherry’s running dry.”

      Her sense of hearing was now afflicted in as gross a manner as had been her sense of smell. She could not have spoken, though her vitality had pressed for speech. It would have astonished him to hear that his solicitude concerning provender for her during his absence was not esteemed a kindness; for surely it is a kindly thing to think of it; and for whom but for one for whom he cared would he be counting the bottles to be left at her disposal, insomuch that the paucity of the bottles of sherry in the establishment distressed his mental faculties?

      “Well, good-bye,” he said, finally. The door closed.

      Had Dahlia’s misery been in any degree simulated, her eyes now, as well as her ears, would have taken positive assurance of his departure. But with the removal of her handkerchief, the loathsome sight of the dinner-table would have saluted her, and it had already caused her suffering enough. She chose to remain as she was, saying to herself, “I am dead;” and softly revelling in that corpse-like sentiment. She scarcely knew that the door had opened again.

      “Dahlia!”

      She heard her name pronounced, and more entreatingly, and closer to her.

      “Dahlia, my poor girl!” Her hand was pressed. It gave her no shudders.

      “I am dead,” she mentally repeated, for the touch did not run up to her heart and stir it.

      “Dahlia, do be reasonable! I can’t leave you like this. We shall be separated for some time. And what a miserable fire you’ve got here! You have agreed with me that we are acting for the best. It’s very hard on me I try what I can to make you comf—happy; and really, to see you leaving your dinner to get cold! Your hands are like ice. The meat won’t be eatable. You know I’m not my own master. Come, Dahly, my darling!”

      He gently put his hand to her chin, and then drew away the handkerchief.

      Dahlia moaned at the exposure of her tear-stained face, she turned it languidly to the wall.

      “Are you ill, my dear?” he asked.

      Men are so considerately practical! He begged urgently to be allowed to send for a doctor.

      But women, when they choose to be unhappy, will not accept of practical consolations! She moaned a refusal to see the doctor.

      Then what can I do for her? he naturally thought, and he naturally uttered it.

      “Say good-bye to me,” he whispered. “And my pretty one will write to me. I shall reply so punctually! I don’t like to leave her at Christmas; and she will give me a line of Italian, and a little French—mind her accents, though!—and she needn’t attempt any of the nasty German—kshrra-kouzzra-kratz!—which her pretty lips can’t do, and won’t do; but only French and Italian. Why, she learnt to speak Italian! ‘La dolcezza ancor dentro me suona.’ Don’t you remember, and made such fun of it at first? ‘Amo zoo;’ ‘no amo me?’ my sweet!”

      This was a specimen of the baby-lover talk, which is charming in its season, and maybe pleasantly cajoling to a loving woman at all times, save when she is in Dahlia’s condition. It will serve even then, or she will pass it forgivingly, as not the food she for a moment requires; but it must be purely simple in its utterance, otherwise she detects the poor chicanery, and resents the meanness of it. She resents it with unutterable sickness of soul, for it is the language of what were to her the holiest hours of her existence, which is thus hypocritically used to blind and rock her in a cradle of deception. If corrupt, she maybe brought to answer to it all the same, and she will do her part of the play, and babble words, and fret and pout deliciously; and the old days will seem to be revived, when both know they are dead; and she will thereby gain any advantage she is seeking.

      But Dahlia’s sorrow was deep: her heart was sound. She did not even perceive the opportunity offered to her for a wily performance. She felt the hollowness of his speech, and no more; and she said, “Good-bye, Edward.”

      He had been on one knee. Springing cheerfully to his feet, “Good-bye, darling,” he said. “But I must see her sit to table first. Such a wretched dinner for her!” and he mumbled, “By Jove, I suppose I shan’t get any at all myself!” His watch confirmed it to him that any dinner which had been provided for him at the Club would be spoilt.

      “Never mind,” he said aloud, and examined the roast-beef ruefully, thinking that, doubtless, it being more than an hour behind the appointed dinner-time at the Club, his guest must now be gone.

      For a minute or so he gazed at the mournful spectacle. The potatoes looked as if they had committed suicide in their own steam. There were mashed turnips, with a glazed surface, like the bright bottom of a tin pan. One block of bread was by the lonely plate. Neither hot nor cold, the whole aspect of the dinner-table resisted and repelled the gaze, and made no pretensions to allure it.

      The thought of partaking of this repast endowed him with a critical appreciation of its character, and a gush of charitable emotion for the poor girl who had such miserable dishes awaiting her, arrested the philosophic reproof which he could have administered to one that knew so little how a dinner of any sort should be treated. He strode to the windows, pulled down the blind he had previously raised, rang the bell, and said,—

      “Dahlia, there—I’m going to dine with you, my love. I’ve rung the bell for more candles. The room shivers. That girl will see you, if you don’t take care. Where is the key of the cupboard? We must have some wine out. The champagne, at all events, won’t be flat.”

      He commenced humming the song of complacent resignation. Dahlia was still inanimate, but as the door was about to open, she rose quickly and sat in a tremble on the sofa, concealing her face.

      An order was given for additional candles, coals, and wood. When the maid had disappeared Dahlia got on her feet, and steadied herself by the wall, tottering away to her chamber.

      “Ah, poor thing!” ejaculated the young man, not without an idea that the demonstration was unnecessary. For what is decidedly disagreeable is, in a young man’s calculation concerning women, not necessary at all,—quite the reverse. Are not women the flowers which decorate sublunary life? It is really irritating to discover them to be pieces of machinery, that for want of proper oiling, creak, stick, threaten convulsions, and are tragic and stir us the wrong way. However, champagne does them good: an admirable wine—a sure specific for the sex!

      He searched around for the keys to get at a bottle and uncork it forthwith. The keys were on the mantelpiece a bad comment on Dahlia’s housekeeping qualities; but in the hurry of action let it pass. He welcomed the candles gladly, and soon had all the cupboards in the room royally open.

      Bustle is instinctively adopted by the human race as the substitute of comfort. He called for more lights, more plates, more knives and forks. He sent for ice the maid observed that it was not to be had save at a distant street: “Jump into a cab—champagne’s СКАЧАТЬ