Fresh Joy. Heidi McLaughlin

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СКАЧАТЬ the profound influence you’re having on your boys’ lives right now—mine included.”

      So that’s exactly what we celebrated.

      We lit four sparklers that day because that’s what joy does—it flips discouragement, rejection, sadness, confusion, and heaviness right side up and upside down and graciously offers us a fresh perspective and a whole new way to view and live in the world.5

      Grow Your Joy

      After I heard Cindy’s story, I was amazed that, 47 rejections later, Cindy was still writing, smiling, and trusting that God would connect her with the right publisher. That’s what thankfulness does. It elevates our thoughts to a higher level and takes the stance that, despite what life throws at us, we can choose to stay joyful.

      1. Get rid of stuff. A large part of our present generation is obsessed with shopping and having more. “I’ll be happy when I have __________.” And so we shop and stockpile, rent off-site containers or storage sheds, and fill and label Tupperware boxes until we lose sight of all we have. But here’s the hard news: overabundance robs us of joy. Instead of enjoying our stuff, we become stuff managers. Excess stuff confuses and distracts us, and the more we have, the less we value what we have.

      Growing up, I had two pairs of shoes: one pair for school and the other for church. I wonder if other parents also said, as mine did, “Heidi, pick up your feet. Don’t scuff your shoes.” I still remember the smell of the shoe polish when it was brought out of the cupboard every Saturday to polish our shoes. Today, I have over 50 pairs of shoes, but I probably don’t value them as much as I should, because I can always go and buy more. The pleasure of acquisition is fleeting. Soon, the next purchase becomes another piece to dust, to keep track of, or to organize. Overabundance destroys value. We need to get rid of our excess stuff, simplify our life, be thankful, and enjoy what we have.

      Kerry and Chris Shook, in their book One Month to Live, express that point so clearly: “When we are thankful, we become content and full of the peace that only He can provide. Focusing on how grateful we are for what we have prevents us from becoming bitter and greedy for more.”6

      2. Learn to be content. To grow joy, we must learn to be thankful for what we have in the moment. The apostle Paul endured beatings, shipwrecks, hunger, and spiritual storms while he was in chains for Christ. When he wrote the letter to the Philippians, he wasn’t sitting on a beach in Maui, but still he exclaimed, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation” (Phil. 4:12). Wow. To be content with whatever we have is a learned process. It does not come naturally. But if we’re always on the lookout for temporary happiness, we won’t find ultimate contentment. Why? Because happiness demands a certain outcome. If I get that man, I win, and I’m happy. If I get that job (or that house, or that car), I’ll be happy. We have momentary feelings of pleasure and success when things are going our way. Each time we attain our happiness goal, we raise the bar, because we’re never satisfied. We get desensitized to the norm because there is always more.

      When we let go of our desire for a particular result we can find joy in the rhythms of everyday life. For example, happiness says, “I will be happy if this meal or project turns out the way I anticipate.” But joy says, “I’m enjoying every step in this process. If it turns out great, we’ll all enjoy it. If it doesn’t, it won’t be the end of the world.” Joy is not a response to an outcome; it is a fruit of the Holy Spirit within us. Joy comes from being connected to our creator. Learning to trust God for the ending to our stories is a huge first step to finding contentment.

      Mark Batterson gets right to the point in his book If: “Joy is not getting what you want; it’s appreciating what you have. And in some cases, it requires wanting less! You’ve got to find fulfillment in the simple pleasures.”7

      3. Remember the great things. Let’s proclaim God’s goodness the same way David did: “The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy” (Ps. 126:3). No matter what our circumstances, if we remember what God has done for us, it changes our perspective.

      I facilitate a grief-sharing group, and one of the most difficult topics begs an answer for “why did God let this happen to me?” This question drains the energy and life out of the room. I’m acquainted with raw grief, so I let the participants lament, tell their stories, and express their pain. But it would be unfair and unkind for me to leave them in that vulnerable state. So I gently prod them to remember “the great things God has done for them” in spite of their unanswered and gut-wrenching question. Eventually the silence breaks, and I hear things like

      • He had dementia, so I do know it was time for him to go. I’m glad he’s now free and healthy.

      • My son dealt with depression and was an addict, so perhaps this was God’s gift—releasing him from his pain.

      • I thank God for the people who surrounded me with love during my darkest hours.

      The atmosphere changes dramatically as praise and thanksgiving erupt spontaneously: “I thank God for the colour of the leaves in the parking lot”; “I thank God for this group and the openness to share”; “I thank Barb for offering to bring me a meal”; “I am grateful that I’m able to start cleaning out my husband’s closet.” The laments turn into longing for healing and hope, and energy returns to the room.

      When we stop and give thanks for the good things God has done and raise a hallelujah amid our pain or questions, new hope arises, and joy is right on its heels.

      4. Pursue physical joy. I love the way God created each of us. Not only does thankfulness give us fresh joy and energy; it also revives us physically. Here’s what Rick Warren says in his book God’s Power to Change Your Life: “Psychologists say that gratitude is the healthiest emotion. Hans Seyle, the father of stress studies, claimed that gratitude produces more emotional energy than any other attitude. Haven’t you found it to be true that the people who are the most grateful are the happiest people you know?”8

      There are amazing benefits of thankfulness, and many of them focus on our physical well-being. According to a 2011 study published in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being, researchers found that participants fell asleep faster and stayed asleep longer after spending 15 minutes jotting down what they’re grateful for in a journal before bedtime. It benefits the heart, boosts your immune system, and protects you from negative emotions. Go ahead—Google “benefits of thankfulness,” and your jaw will drop at the significant results.

      So, what’s stopping you from being thankful and raising a hallelujah amid your unpredictably wonderful life?

      I made a commitment to myself that I will choose to be thankful until I take my last breath. Right now, my goal is to reach ten thousand reasons to praise God in the middle of whatever circumstances come my way. Come along and join me on this journey. Thankfulness is the superpower of fresh joy. A grateful heart is a heart that is content and free, and it primes the brain for healing and miracles.

      Stop

      and Ask God to Make You Joyful

      Ask God, How can I be more thankful?

      S—Scripture: “The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy” (Ps. 126:3).

      T—Thanksgiving: Looking back I see how you’ve cared for me even when I didn’t know it. Thank you for the great things you do for me every day in ways I can’t even imagine. Thank you for caring for me so deeply and richly.

      O—Observation: I’ve come to see that a huge part СКАЧАТЬ