Sea Music. Sara MacDonald
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Название: Sea Music
Автор: Sara MacDonald
Издательство: HarperCollins
Жанр: Историческая литература
isbn: 9780007396740
isbn:
She would spend the holidays slyly making him cry. After he too left home for boarding school and she started university she still verbally bullied him. Once he was steeped in the timeless and barbaric ways of public school, he never told, never blabbed. There was something wet but intransigent in Barnaby that still irritated her to death.
As the taxi filters out of the traffic, Anna sees Rudi waiting for her outside the theatre. He waves, his face lighting up when he sees her. His eyes dwelling on her face. He moves forward to pay the taxi as she gets out. She feels the familiar surge of excitement and pleasure in him.
They met at a conference in Zurich. After a seminar she had given she overheard him muttering appreciative and complimentary remarks about her to a colleague, not realising she was fluent in German and understood every word.
Rudi had told her that he had been so bowled over by that beautiful English barrister, it had been like walking into a door. She was giving a series of lectures to clever, noisy delegates that weekend and it had been a challenge to keep them engrossed and silent.
They strolled through the parks of the city together. They went to the opera, talked of their failed marriages, their work and themselves. For the whole of that weekend Anna spoke only German and it was a strangely liberating feeling. She felt comfortable in her skin, in the country, and with Rudi. It had been like waking from a long, lonely sleep. That weekend was also the beginning of a successful international lecture she was establishing as a consultant. Rudi was seconded to the Swiss Bank in London the following year and he took a lease on a flat in Chiswick. His sons flew out regularly for holidays. They were adolescent and enjoyed London and all it had to offer, so they were polite to Anna. She found them much easier to handle than Lucy, who had always been an enigma.
Anna and Rudi married a year later, when their respective children had got used to the idea. Lucy begged to leave her Dorset boarding school and go down to live with Barnaby and her grandparents. She wanted to take her A levels at a sixth-form college.
After talking to her headmistress, Anna eventually agreed. Both she and Rudi tried to persuade Lucy to stay in London, believing that the standard of teaching would be higher, but Lucy was adamant. She did not want to live in the flat with Rudi, Anna, and Rudi’s visiting children.
Anna was not surprised. Anything or anybody Anna liked, Lucy would dislike on principle. However, the flat was too small for three teenage children, and the thought of having Rudi to herself, except for his sons’ visits, had been a huge relief. Lucy got surprisingly good A levels. She was as happy with Barnaby, Martha and Fred as Anna felt distanced and irritated by them.
Anna feels a sudden relief that Lucy is now adult. Life is so much easier. As Rudi bends to kiss her, she thinks how lucky she is. Rudi, having fulfilled most of his own ambitions, opted to forgo promotion and coast happily towards retirement in London to be with her. Anna knows she is happier than she has ever been.
Anna shakes hands with Rudi’s Swiss guests and they make their way to the bar. Rudi’s hand hovers courteously at the small of her back. It reminds Anna of the way Fred walked beside Martha, and she is touched. Somehow, it makes her feel secure, for Fred has been as constant to Martha as the changing seasons.
Evensong is over and Lucy is helping Barnaby put Martha to bed. Fred is perfectly capable of managing himself, but he cannot manage Martha any more and it upsets him. Her grandparents have single beds now, near enough to touch, to hold hands in the night, but not to disturb each other’s sleep.
Martha always goes to bed first and Lucy will sit and hold her hands, check her hot-water bottle, give her her pills, talk to her and marvel at her still-beautiful face. Martha has always worn pretty linen nightdresses, and somehow, once she is in bed she relaxes, her face loses its anxious look and smoothes into a tiny unlined child’s face. Suddenly coherent, she will tell Lucy long rambling tales of building this house, of starting the garden from scratch. Of meeting Fred in London. Of love at first sight.
Fred will appear out of the bathroom, bathed and immaculate in pyjamas and dressing gown, and say politely but firmly to Lucy, ‘Good night, child.’
It is her signal to leave them. She will bend and kiss her grandmother, who twines her thin arms round Lucy’s neck. ‘Oh, my darling, how I love you!’
‘I love you too, Gran. Sleep well. Good night.’
She bends to her stooped grandfather. ‘Good night, Gramps. God bless.’
‘God bless, child.’
Every night it is the same. Barnaby comes then to tuck them in, to stand at the end of their beds, to say a good night prayer.
‘Good night, darling Barnaby,’ his mother whispers, eyes closed, half asleep.
‘Good night, Mum.’
‘Good night, old chap,’ his father says.
‘Good night, Dad. Sleep well.’
The security of ritual. Barnaby shuts the bedroom door and leans against it. ‘Sans everything,’ he breathes. Fred will fall into a deep and heavy sleep, but Martha could get up a dozen times and wander about during the evening.
Lucy is pouring them both a glass of wine and they sit together in silence, drinking. All week she has wanted to ask Barnaby about the box she found in the attic. She has never had secrets from him, but she looks at his drained and exhausted face and is silent.
After a while she says, ‘Barnes, you can’t go on like this. Sundays are hell for you. You need weekend carers now, not just old Mrs B. for a few hours. You are going to need round-the-clock help soon.’
She hesitates, then says miserably, ‘You know that interview I went up to London for, teaching foreign students? Well, I got the job.’
‘Lucy, that’s marvellous.’ Barnaby leaps up and kisses her. ‘You clever girl. I’m so pleased for you. Just think, you’ll be able to use your degree and earn some decent money.’
‘Well, the pay is not brilliant, but the best thing about it is that I can go and teach in Italy for three months. But how are you going to cope on your own? It’s going to get worse with Gran.’ She gets up and pours more wine into Barnaby’s glass.
‘I don’t start the job for a couple of months, but Tristan wants me to spend his leave with him before he goes. It means I would have to leave quite soon …’
‘Lucy,’ Barnaby says firmly, ‘how I manage is not your responsibility. You’ve got your own life to lead.’ He is watching her closely. He suspects Lucy is anxious about leaving Cornwall and the security of this household. ‘It will be fun for you to live in London for a while; it doesn’t have to be for ever. It will be a great adventure and much easier for you and Tristan to be together when he gets back from Kosovo. I’ll miss you enormously, you know that, Lu. You’ve been wonderful these last few months, but there is a world out there waiting for you.’
Lucy bursts into tears. ‘I don’t think I should go. I should be here, near my family. I don’t think you dare admit you need more help with Gran and Gramps. I feel sick just thinking of leaving you.’
Barnaby СКАЧАТЬ