Sex For Dummies. Dr. Ruth K. Westheimer

Чтение книги онлайн.

СКАЧАТЬ can reverse this trend so a greater portion of the penis becomes exposed; thus, his penis can “grow.” The approximation doctors use is one inch of penis length gained for every 30 pounds of excess weight lost. (Sorry, all you skinny guys, but losing extra weight won’t help you.)

      Some surgical techniques can enlarge a man’s penis. One technique can make most of it, except for the head, fatter, which leaves the head looking disproportionate. The other technique makes the penis longer, but requires the doctors to cut certain ligaments so the penis doesn’t point as high as before, which can cause the man to lose sensitivity. These side effects, as well as other risks, greatly reduce the value of these procedures, which is why very few surgeons perform them. In my estimation, the risks make such surgery not even worth considering. If you are intent on learning more of the gory details, however, make an appointment with a urologist.

      Getting erection direction

      The proportion of crus (penis under the skin) to exposed penis can cause variations in the direction that a penis points during an erection. Men with a shorter crus, and thus a longer penis, are more likely to have an erection that points downward, while an erect penis that has a longer crus will probably point outward, or even straight up.

      Occasionally, a man tells me that he is concerned because his penis points in a certain direction when it is erect. As you can see from Frank’s situation in the following case study, this phenomenon isn’t unusual. Some men have a more pronounced curve than others, and sometimes the penis also bends to the left or to the right.

       Frank

       When Frank came to see me, we spent half an hour talking without broaching the real reason for his visit. He admitted that he didn’t go out with women, but he blamed that on all sorts of things that didn’t make sense to me. I could feel that more was bothering him than he was letting on, and I told him straight out that I thought he wasn’t being truthful with me. That’s when he told me that he was afraid of dating women because, if he got close enough to them to have sex, they would notice that his penis was misshapen.

       Because I’m not a medical doctor, I don’t examine patients, but I did ask him to describe for me what his penis looked like. He said that, when he had an erection, instead of sticking straight out, as did the erect penises he’d seen in some porn videos, his penis had a very large curve in it. To me, his description seemed to be within the bounds of normalcy, but I sent him to a urologist to make sure.

       When I next saw him, he was a new man. The urologist had confirmed what I had thought, and knowing that he wasn’t going to be made fun of gave him the confidence to start dating. The next time I heard from Frank, about a year later, he called to tell me that he was engaged.

      

Because I’m not a medical doctor, my first piece of advice if you feel that your penis has an abnormal shape is to go to a urologist to make certain that this curvature doesn’t indicate some problem.

      In the vast majority of cases, the curve falls well within the norms of most men, and the concern is just a case of sexual ignorance. In other words, the man doesn’t know that most penises are curved to some extent. Once in a while, a man does have a more pronounced curve than most. Even the majority of these men don’t have a problem in bed, although a few may have to adjust the positions they use. In some cases, however, a man may have Peyronie’s disease, a condition that can make sex impossible (although, rest assured, in most cases the disease goes away on its own after a short while, as I discuss in Chapter 22).

      In any case, this problem is mostly in the minds of the men who come to me with concerns about the appearance of their erect penises. Because they believe that their penises look unusual, they are afraid to date. They worry that, when the time comes to undress, their partner will react negatively.

      

You have one simple way to avoid worrying about how a new partner will react to the shape of your penis, and this applies to the vast majority of other doubts that people have about their sexual abilities: Wait until you have established a strong relationship before you have sex with somebody. I don’t say you have to get married, but you will find the experience of making love much better if you are in love and you integrate sex as an expression of your love rather than as a form of recreation.

      So, whether your penis looks like a boomerang or is straight as an arrow, remember that the three little words “I love you” are far more important to your lover than the direction in which your penis points.

Grasping the Basics of Your Testicles

      Although a man may not understand the inner workings of his penis, outwardly, he is at least on somewhat good terms with that part of his anatomy. But when it comes to testicles, too many men know almost nothing about them.

      Be forewarned: By the time you’ve finished with this chapter, you will not only be seeing testicles differently, you’ll also be feeling them in a whole new way.

      Making the descent

      As a baby boy develops inside his mother’s womb, his testicles are still inside his body (in his abdomen). During the last few months before birth, the testicles poke their way outside, or descend, into the scrotum, a sac of skin located at the base of the penis. Occasionally, one or both of the testicles don’t make the descent.

      Some of these undescended testicles are of the hide-and-seek variety, meaning that, during the first year or so, they kind of come and go. As long as they make an occasional appearance, everything will be just fine, and eventually they’ll get up the courage to stay where they belong.

      A testicle that remains inside the body (a condition called cryptorchidism) won’t function properly because the temperature is too warm. A boy who has this problem may also be embarrassed by his appearance. For these reasons, medical intervention is usually called for, which may be a type of hormonal therapy but more likely will involve surgery. This condition also puts men at a higher risk of testicular cancer.

      Manufacturing hormones

      In addition to the testicles’ vital role in the continuation of the species (which I discuss in the following “Producing sperm” section), men require functioning testicles for the hormones they produce, most importantly testosterone. Testosterone is called the “male hormone,” and that name truly fits. If a boy is born without testosterone, his scrotum forms as the outer lips of a vagina and his penis as something akin to a clitoris.

      Producing sperm

Despite the fact that a variety of contraceptive methods have allowed people to disconnect sexual intercourse from reproduction, the main purpose of having sex, from an evolutionary point of view, is still to make babies. But, although the penis is required to penetrate the woman’s vagina for the best chance at success, the man needs seeds to place within her to accomplish this important task. These seeds, called spermatozoa (or more often by their nickname, sperm), are manufactured in the testicles.

      Sperm СКАЧАТЬ