Amelia Fang and the Naughty Caticorns. Laura Ellen Anderson
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Название: Amelia Fang and the Naughty Caticorns
Автор: Laura Ellen Anderson
Издательство: HarperCollins
Жанр: Природа и животные
Серия: The Amelia Fang Series
isbn: 9781405297097
isbn:
‘Speaking of babies,’ said Grimaldi, ‘how much longer until your new brother or sister arrives?’
‘Hopefully th—’ Amelia began, before being cut off by a very familiar voice.
‘The toilet seat STILL ISN’T SHINY ENOUGH!’ Countess Frivoleeta’s shrill voice echoed through the Fang Mansion.
Amelia flinched. ‘Hopefully the baby will be here soon,’ she continued in a hushed voice. ‘Now Mum’s expecting a baby, she’s acting so weird. She won’t stop eating Foot Fudge and she never even liked it before! And then one minute she’s all happy and laughing, and the next she’s crying. And NOTHING is shiny enough any more. NOTHING! ’
Grimaldi shot an anxious look at his slightly toe-jam-smeared and not-very-shiny scythe blade.
Amelia gave an excitable wriggle. ‘But I REALLY hope the baby hurries up because I can’t wait to be a big sister!’
‘THAT’S WELL EXCITING!’ bellowed Florence through a mouthful of breakfast. ‘I WISH I ’AD A LITTLE BRUVVA OR SISTER. I’D TEACH ’EM ’OW TO BE THE BEST PRANCER IN THE KINGDOMS!’ Even though Florence was huge, she pranced as if she were as light as a feather. It was a very impressive sight.
‘If I had a little grim-brother or sister, I’d teach them how to sweep up dead toads without leaving a slimy mess,’ said Grimaldi, spreading some more toe jam on to his putrid pancake.
‘NICE,’ said Florence with a grimace. ‘AN’ YOU JUST USED THE SAME SCYTHE FOR SPREADING JAM THAT YOU USE TO SWEEP UP SQUISHED TOADS!’
‘I cleaned it on my cloak hood first,’ said Grimaldi, gazing innocently at Florence.
Amelia chuckled. ‘I can’t wait to introduce my baby brother or sister to you guys!’ she said. Squashy pa-doinged into Amelia’s lap and blew a raspberry.
‘And of course, the baby will be very excited to meet YOU!’ Amelia said, tickling Squashy’s tummy. He squeaked and smiled.
Amelia’s mother waddled into the kitchen. She had a very large tummy indeed, her usually immaculate beehive hairdo was a tangled mess, and her eyeballs were in the wrong sockets. She walked straight over to the fridge.
‘WHERE IS MY FOOT FUDGE?!’ she squawked, searching through half-eaten tubs of splattered spleen and mushy brain balls.
‘Uh oh,’ Amelia whispered to her friends. ‘I think Dad forgot to buy more fudge . . .’
Countess Frivoleeta turned around and gave Amelia a wobbly-eyed stern look. ‘WHO ate the last of my –’ Luckily, just at that moment, Amelia’s dad came running into the kitchen holding a big, stripy cardboard box.
‘HERE, my disastrous little wart-picker!’ said Count Drake, trying to catch his breath. He opened the box to reveal a freshly made batch of Foot Fudge. ‘I dashed to your favourite bakery, Drop Bread Gorgeous. And look, there are extra-crusty bits from in between the toes, just how you like it!’
Countess Frivoleeta’s bottom lip trembled. Then she sat down at the kitchen table and burst into tears.
Count Drake put an arm around his wife. ‘Why are you crying, darkling? I thought you’d be happy about the extra-crusty fudge?’
‘NO! It’s not that . . .’ said the countess as a long strand of snot dangled from her right nostril. ‘I just remembered something I saw last week. There was a mouldy bean on the ground outside. It was all by itself. So small . . . and mouldy . . . and bean-like!’
She let out a loud wail. Amelia, Florence and Grimaldi all tried very hard not to laugh.
BOOOOOOOONG!
The door gong echoed loudly through the Fang Mansion, covering the sound of the gang’s muffled laughter.
‘Are we expecting guests?’ asked Count Drake, sounding quite relieved at the interruption.
‘Maybe Wooo is back early from visiting his brother?’ said Amelia.
Wooo was the Fang family’s ghost butler. He kept everything in the Fang Mansion in order. But once a year he would take a well-deserved minibreak to visit his travelling brother, Fantom. Without Wooo around, things could get a little chaotic and messy, especially now that Amelia’s parents were distracted with preparations for the new baby.
Countess Frivoleeta suddenly stopped crying. Her eyes grew so wide that Amelia feared they might fall out.
‘Bothering bogeymen! ’ the countess shrieked. ‘That’ll be my sister, Lavitora. I completely forgot that I’d agreed to babysit her caticorns while she goes on an important work trip.’ She began shovelling handfuls of Foot Fudge into her mouth. ‘How on earth are we meant to look after three tiny creatures when we still have so much to get ready for our new baby?! He or she could be born any night now!’ Both Countess Frivoleeta’s eyeballs finally popped out on to the floor, rolling over to where Amelia stood.
‘It’s all right, Mum,’ Amelia said, wiping down her mum’s eyeballs and handing them back. ‘Florence, Grimaldi and I can help look after the caticorns while you and Dad take care of the baby stuff.’
The thought of looking after three fluffy little caticorns sounded like SO much fun. Amelia could already imagine them following her everywhere as her mum and dad looked on, telling each other what a brilliant big sister she would make!
‘What do you think, guys?’ Amelia smiled a big, fang-filled grin at her friends.
‘EASY-PEASY!’ declared Florence breezily.
‘And I’m very good with little creatures,’ said Grimaldi.
‘WELL, DEAD ONES ANYWAY,’ Florence pointed out.
‘Oh, thank you, my horrible little bin-lids,’ said Count Drake, smiling at everyone gratefully and putting an arm around Amelia. ‘That would be a massive help!’ He turned to the countess. ‘See, dear, everything’s going to work out juuuust fine.’
‘Oh, Amelia,’ said Countess Frivoleeta, stroking her daughter’s cheek and smearing Foot Fudge across it. ‘All grown-up . . . and . . . and . . .’
‘I FINK SHE’S GUNNA CRY AGAIN,’ Florence whispered loudly.
But before Frivoleeta had a chance to bawl her eyes out, a loud DONK DONK DONK filled the room, making her jump.
Grimaldi yelped and hid under the table as a face appeared at the kitchen window behind him.
‘COOO-EEEEEE!’ said a large prim-and-proper-looking СКАЧАТЬ