The Satires of Horace. Horace

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      and maybe ones that are a bit more tame.

      When Maenius decided to attack35

      the name of Novius behind his back,

      somebody interrupted him with,

      “Hey! Do you not know yourself, or do you say you do not notice due to all your lies?” “I'm no self-critic,” Maenius replies.40

      It's silly and obscene, this egotism,

      and it deserves your public criticism.

      For your own shortcomings, your eyes will burn,

      then blur when smeared with balm. Why do they turn

      as clear as any eagle's or a snake45

      of Epidaurus when it's time to take

      a look at how friends fail?—although what goes

      around comes back again whenever those

      who scrutinize your faults are these same friends:

      “He is a bit pugnacious, and offends50 the keener noses of the present day.”

      He may feel ridiculed when people say

      he cuts his hair the way that bumpkins do,

      his toga drags, and an ill-fitting shoe

      keeps slipping off, but he's a decent guy—55

      you won't find someone better if you try,

      and vast capacities may hide within

      that fellow's unsophisticated skin.

      Once finished, shake yourself to check if seeds

      of evil in your nature or bad deeds60

      are sown within you; in neglected fields

      we need to burn away the weedy yields.

      Let's turn now to this subject: being blind,

      a man who is in love can never find

      his girlfriend's blemishes and may extol65

      her flaws, just like Balbinus and the mole

      of Hagna. With our friends I wish we'd make

      a reasonably similar mistake

      and ethics labeled it accordingly—

      for if a friend has some deformity70

      we should, like fathers with their kids, not shun

      the handicap. A dad will name a son

      who's crosseyed “Blinky.” If he is as tall

      as Sisyphus the Midget, he will call

      the son “Small Fry.” A bowlegged boy who limps75

      will be affectionately known as “Gimps”

      and one with twisted anklebones who hobbles

      unsteadily will win the nickname “Wobbles.”

      Somebody's tight with money? Let's just say

      that he's “quite frugal.” Does a man display80

      few signs of tactfulness or self-restraint?

      Within his social crowd, he tries to paint

      himself as “eager.” Is somebody loud

      and blunt? Let's call him “candid” and “uncowed.”

      Obnoxious? Let's relabel him “empassioned.”85

      For me this practice shows how bonds are fashioned

      and preserved once formed, and yet we turn

      good habits on their head and foul an urn

      that was pristine. When someone lives nearby

      who is an unassuming, honest guy,90

      we'll call him “Ox” or “Sluggo.” One who glides

      past every obstacle and always hides

      his naked flank from likely enemies

      while life is churning with its jealousies

      and innuendos will be labeled “fake”95

      or “too conniving”—never “wide awake”

      or “shrewd”—though if a person's so sincere

      (as I would think, Maecenas, I appear

      to you so often) that he'll interject,

      perhaps, with chitchat, as his friends reflect100

      or read, we say he's short on savoir faire.

      Alas! Despite remaining unaware

      of adverse consequences, we endure

      this rule inflicted on ourselves! For sure,

      there's no one born without some faults; the best105

      possess those less substantial than the rest.

      As is fair, any worthwhile friend will balance

      my deficiencies against my talents,

      and if he wants my friendship, he'll place weight

      upon my qualities that compensate110

      for my shortcomings—if, in fact, they do!

      And if he is intending to pursue

      my friendship, fairness means he must be weighed

      upon that scale. No one should be dismayed

      if he discovers pimples on a friend—115

      unless he wants his own warts to offend.

      If absolution is what someone wants,

      he should expect to grant the same response.

      Moreover, since we can't completely weed

      out violent rage and errors of that breed120

      for people stuck with their stupidity,

      why couldn't Reason with validity

      rely upon its weights and measurements

      and match fair penalties to each offense?

      Suppose a servant who had cleared a dish125

      had СКАЧАТЬ