Rags To Riches Collection. Rebecca Winters
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СКАЧАТЬ a lot I want to say, Nicola.’

      She counted to three and when she was sure of herself, she looked up. She wished her eyes were half as perceptive as his. She’d give anything to know what he was thinking. She remembered the way he’d held her when she’d cried, the way he’d fed her chocolate sultanas and the way they’d laughed and laughed on the veranda that night, and she nodded. ‘We have all night, Cade. There’s nowhere else I need to be.’

      ‘Good.’ He nodded, and then sat. He rested his elbows on his knees, hands lightly clasped in front of him and lips pursed as he stared out at the dark river. Then he straightened again and met her gaze. ‘First, I want to apologise to you for that appalling proposal of marriage. I didn’t see at the time what an insult it was. I do now and I want you to know I am truly and deeply sorry.’

      ‘That’s okay.’ It was an automatic response, but she didn’t doubt his sincerity.

      ‘It wasn’t okay.’ He shook his head, but then his lips tilted a fraction. ‘That said, I’m still hoping you’ll forgive me.’ His eyes glittered in the half dark. ‘You deserve so much more than that half-baked scheme I offered. You deserve a man who worships the very ground you walk on.’

      Her breath caught at the force of his words. And then her heart started to burn. Cade was never going to be that man, was he?

      She swallowed back a lump. ‘I accept your apology, Cade. All’s forgiven. You panicked, that’s all.’

      She suddenly wanted away from here, away from this man who would never love her the way she wanted him to love her. The sweetness of their meeting could no longer counter its bitterness. She shot to her feet, but then didn’t know what to do. She took a couple of steps forward to stare down at the water.

      ‘I’ve missed you, Nicola.’

      She dragged in a breath. She folded her arms and turned back. ‘I’ve missed all of you too.’

      His eyes didn’t waver as he rose and joined her. ‘Yes—Ella, Holly, Harry and Jack all miss you as well. But I’m not talking about them. I’m talking about me. I miss you.’

      Her mouth went dry. She couldn’t speak.

      ‘And yes, I miss seeing you with the girls. I miss watching you tickle Holly until she’s laughing uncontrollably, and I miss the way you and Ella have the most serious conversations and then Ella jumps up smiling as if you’ve given her the secret of the universe. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss those things. They’re not what I miss the most, though.’

      They weren’t? Her heartbeat drummed out a tattoo she thought anyone within a ten-metre radius must hear.

      ‘I miss the scent of strawberry jam in my days. I miss watching you walk across a room where I can admire the very shape of you.’

      Heat flared in her cheeks.

      ‘I miss the shape of your mouth. I miss the taste of you.’

      ‘Oh!’ She pressed her hands to her cheeks in an effort to cool them.

      He shrugged and sent her a sheepish grin. ‘What can I say? I’m a guy. It’s how I’m wired.’ He took her hands. ‘But even those aren’t the things I miss the most. I miss...’ He stilled. ‘I miss talking with you—proper, honest talking with no game playing. I miss laughing with you until my sides hurt. I miss someone noticing the minute I walk into a room.’

      His hands tightened around hers. ‘I miss someone sensing when something is troubling me. I miss sensing that about you. I miss your laugh. I miss the way you eye chocolate sultanas as if they’re the devil’s own food and the way you eat them as if they’re manna from heaven. I miss the way you lift your face to the sky when you’re cantering on Scarlett. I miss the way you stare up at a night sky as if it’s the most magical thing you’ve ever seen. More than anything, I miss your smile. I really miss your smile.’

      She stared at him. She couldn’t say a word as she tried to process his words and what they meant. He missed her, but that didn’t mean...

      He led her back to the bench. She collapsed onto it, her shaky knees grateful for the respite. Cade didn’t sit. He paced up and down in front of her.

      ‘It took me a long time to find an answer to your question.’

      ‘Which one?’ she croaked.

      ‘The one about Fran...and what I’d do if she came back and wanted to start over.’

      She leaned back although every atom of her being strained towards him. ‘And?’

      ‘I’d welcome her back into the girls’ lives because she’s their mother.’

      Nicola nodded. That had always gone without saying.

      He frowned and paced harder. ‘And then I got all caught up on whether I would choose Fran for the girls—Fran, who has proven herself unreliable—or a woman who I trusted and respected and who I believed wouldn’t let the girls down.’

      ‘And?’

      ‘And then I realised that was wrong thinking. I’d welcome Fran back into Ella and Holly’s lives.’ He stopped pacing. He stopped right in front of her. ‘But I wouldn’t welcome her back into my life. You were right, Nicola, when you said you deserved better than what I’d offered, that you deserved love and friendship. It hit me then that I deserved those things too. And they’re not something I can ever find with Fran.’

      Her jaw dropped. Her heart thumped. He looked as if...as if... ‘I didn’t think you believed in love any more—a fairy tale, isn’t that what you called it?’

      ‘It’s what I wanted to believe—to protect myself from being hurt again.’ He drew her to her feet. ‘But then a no-nonsense nanny with killer curves and a smile that practically knocked me off my feet swept into my life and made me feel alive again...made me feel things I never had before and I...’

      A smile started up in the depths of her. ‘Panicked?’ she offered.

      He cupped her face. ‘Nicola, I have absolutely no right to expect you to believe me, but I love you.’

      She wanted to believe him—so much it hurt. The light in his eyes as they rested on her lips left her in no doubt whatsoever that he desired her.

      ‘When Fran left, my life went into a tailspin of shock, panic and pain at the trauma the girls suffered. When you left, it felt as if I’d lost a limb, as if nothing in me worked properly any more.’

      Her heart lurched and then thumped hard and fast. What he’d described fitted her own state during these last few months so perfectly that suddenly she knew he spoke the truth. He wasn’t after a mother for his children, but a wife to share his life.

      He loved her!

      He went down on one knee. ‘Nicola, I can offer you a family who will adore you, friendship, a horse, life on an Outback station—and if any of those things will sway you I’ll use them shamelessly—but mostly I can offer you a heart filled with love for you. I love you, my beautiful girl. I will love you till the day I die. Please say that you’ll marry me and let me spend the rest of my life proving to СКАЧАТЬ