Love Hurts. JJ Keller

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      Justin rested comfortably in his crib. Shania couldn’t sleep. She glanced at her cellphone–ten o’clock. Not late by any means, but the movers were scheduled at seven in the morning. Once they arrived in Briarwood, she’d have a long day of unpacking what was necessary. However, most important of all was taking care of Justin.

      She walked around the boxes, making sure they were sealed. The rustic golden wall paint looked dingy without artwork to enhance the color. Her lips curved in memory of her and Morgan painting the house. He’d hated the “baby poop” color she’d chosen for the living room until she muted the tone with an amber glaze. Then the ambiance became Tuscan as she’d planned.

      Morgan. Her breath held for a few seconds and then started. Had he gone ahead and married Patty? Maybe he’d misunderstood her declaration. Perhaps she shouldn’t have run. Could she have stood in front of him wearing only a strapless bra, thong and high heels? No, she’d never exposed her body in public and probably wouldn’t have removed the dress if it wasn’t for the confidence she’d gained from working at Companion Connections. The job built her self-assurance and as a result she could–would–speak her mind.

      As if she had a choice in removing the gown. Wanting to escape an awkward situation, she stepped out of her shell. Thank goodness the choir robes were nearby.

      Returning the gown was easier than she’d thought it would be. Shania stopped at a store near Morgan’s church to get the special drinks the nurse recommended instead of juice for Justin. A dry cleaner was two doors down. She changed into a pair of shorts and shirt stored in the trunk of her car and dropped off the black chorus gown to be cleaned. Fortunately they did business with the minister and promised to add it to their next order. Thankful, she paid and left, noting the cathedral’s parking lot was empty. Two hours had passed since she arrived at the doctor’s. A vacant lot wasn’t a sign that the wedding had been canceled, but her spirit raised anyway.

      Shania closed her eyes, keeping the pain at bay. She walked around the packing crates to the front door and stepped outside into the balmy night, leaving the entrance ajar enough to hear her son. She glanced at the gray rectangle mailbox attached to the cream siding and a sliver of excitement ran through her. Her fingernail slid between the lid and box. Would there be a message from Morgan, stating “I was here, where were you?” She glanced inside. No mail. No love note. No future with Morgan. Deep seated misery made her throat hurt. She leaned her forehead against the frame of the doorway and took a deep breath, resisting the urge to cry. She hadn’t cried for Beck when she said goodbye, yet now she wanted to open the gates and flood the last of her tissues.

      “Shania?”

      She sniffed back the dribble, brushed her nose with the back of her hand and swiveled around. Her gut clenched in agonizing fear. Morgan wore his black tux without the tie and corsage. His shirt had been unbuttoned enough to show a t-shirt beneath. He looked like a movie star in his breathtaking beauty. She loved him. Her breath caught in her throat. He didn’t smile. “You look like the newest double oh-seven.”

      “We need to talk,” he responded. He stood in the shadows. She couldn’t read his expression, but his tone sounded serious.

      The time is now, her mind shouted. Go for it or lose the chance to connect. She took a step. Morgan moved out of the darkness. Pain and joy sparkled in his eyes. Shania grabbed his lapels and tugged him closer. “I’d rather claim my first kiss.”

      Morgan exhaled. His whispered curse hovered near her ear and then was carried away on the wind. He held her gaze, searing her, as if digging deep into her soul. She licked her lips, hoping he wouldn’t deny her. Her gaze moved to his mouth, waiting and wishing. She held her breath. Would he? Oh, God, let him dare!

      He tilted his head and cupped her face. She closed her eyes and moved an inch, no more, no less. Like an addiction, she needed to feel the heat of his hands. Yet, the slightest move and she’d lose the fragile contact she did have with him. His thumbs rubbed her cheeks, soft tiny brushes.

      She released the breath caught in her chest, then pulled her lips inward to wet them again. He smelled like spicy cinnamon and male aftershave. Her gut clenched in agony. His closeness was pleasure and pain. Her knees weakened. Morgan quickly moved his hands from her face to her arms, as if to hold her up.

      “Ah, Shania.” He pressed his cheek against hers, taking a deep breath. “What are you doing to me? I can’t resist you.”

      “Then don’t. I want you. Do you want me?” She begged for his lips to touch hers, just one slight taste of him. One time to test the sparks, to see if a fire would ignite as she’d anticipated.

      A lock of her hair, fallen from the loose bun, fluttered as he exhaled. Self doubt crept up her spine. She wouldn’t ask again. Either he wanted to be with her or not.

      He tugged her close. Her thin t-shirt pressed against the starched suit jacket, causing her nipples to harden. She laid her cheek on his lapel, trying to steady her trembling legs while giving him space and time to come to a decision. The scent of the lily corsage remained on the coat, a quick and painfully sharp reminder that he could very well be married. She sucked in a harsh breath, praying it wasn’t true.

      “Did you mean what you said?” he whispered. His hands embraced her, his palms resting near her waist with fingers touching the curve of her back. Their thighs touched. Liquid pooled low in her abdomen. She wanted to crawl inside him.

      “Every word.” Hopeful excitement rang through her slow whispered words.

      “Do you want to be together?” He rested his chin on top of her head.

      “Yes.”

      “Then I–”

      Justin screamed. Torn between needing to hear Morgan’s words and going to her son, she stepped out of his arms. Uncertain, she gazed at Morgan. Was he proposing a future?

      Morgan kissed the top of her head. “Go to him.”

      “Will you be here after I get him settled?” She hated the almost desperate, needy tone creeping into her voice. Tears stung her eyes.

      With a slight shake of his head, he whispered, “I’m sorry, Shania…”

      Unable to stand listening to the rest of his words, Shania turned and rushed into the house. Their love wasn’t meant to be. He’d go do what he felt was necessary and she and Justin would leave for Briarwood.

      * * * *

      Farmland separated by wooded acres surrounded the mid-size sprawling city of Briarwood, Indiana. Briarwood University was a complex mix of ancient chipped-brick buildings, smelling of time, and oddly angled contemporary structures. The campus was fastidiously perfect with layers of flora. Unique СКАЧАТЬ