Relationship. Paul Evanson

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       “Love your neighbor as yourself.”

      We were not meant to live our lives alone. Your purpose is not complete unless you are in relationship with others. We were not meant to sit in conversation with God alone all day, every day, nor were we created to live out a solitary life focusing on our outer appearance while our innermost needs remain unexpressed and unmet. Shame, fear, depression, denial and anxiety are only a few symptoms of those unmet needs. They are warning signs that we are focused on earthly things instead of on our relationship with God and with others.

      Though I don’t claim to understand it, I must admit it: In order to experience the fullness of life we need each other on a consistent basis and at an intimate level. The better my relationship with God, the more I start to see people through His eyes. It makes me want to 1) be the best I can be for them and 2) stay out of the way so He can be in relationship with them through me.

      In India, the common greeting between people is “Namaste”, which roughly translated means, “the perfect light in me sees the perfect light in you.” When we see the “perfect light” of God in each other, in every interaction, we start to fulfill our purpose. While this may sound like a challenging task, it helps to remember that we’re not on our own with this one. The Holy Spirit is always there. In Matthew 18:20, God tells us ”For where two or three come together in my name, there I am with them.” That means that every conversation is a three-way conversation—between you, the other person, and the Holy Spirit.

      When I say we need to approach “every interaction” by trying to see God in the other person, I really mean every interaction. We need to have God’s perspective, not just when we are with our close friends and family members, but also with the man at the bus stop, the co-worker in our office, the cashier at the coffee bar, the server at the restaurant—everyone we meet. Even a ten-second interaction can be life changing, not because we did anything, but because the Holy Spirit worked through us to reveal something to the other person. That can only happen when we are fully present and mindful of God’s presence as well.

      This is your primary reason for being.

      Chapter 2: Reprioritizing

      You have one purpose: Love God, Love your neighbor in every interaction every day you are on this planet. Only you can fulfill this purpose. Accomplishing this requires two things:

      1 Loving God and loving your neighbor becomes your priority.

      2 Making relationships with others the priority in every area of your life.

      Our standard priorities lose meaning in light of this. How many people do you know that would say they “know” God? If you belong to a church community, probably every single one of them. They might think that their busy lives demonstrate how well they know God. They may even be “winning souls for Christ” through mission work or sharing their testimony with others. But do they have an intimacy with God that surpasses all other relationships? Now, I’m not saying there is anything wrong with any of the above activities. What I am saying is that knowing God is about much more than going through the motions that we think demonstrate our knowledge of Him. If we are going to make loving God our main concern—and we must if we are to live in the kind of authentic relationship He planned for us—then we have to make our relationship with Him our number one priority.

      As we said earlier, to know God means spending time with Him. Listening to Him. Being aware of His presence, of His desire for you. Treating Him like you would your best friend. When we do these things, read His word, and strive to see God in every person we meet, that’s when we truly get to know Him. When our relationship with God is in the forefront of our minds every day, then we can’t help but love ourselves and our neighbor. Knowing Him is the foundation of living a life in authentic relationship and everything else flows from that.

      Our achievement-oriented culture makes it easy for us to lose sight of this. In the documentary, “Happy”, the filmmaker illustrates how detrimental it is to our own sense of happiness when we value achievement over relationship. One story, set in Japan, one of the most achievement-oriented cultures in the world, focuses on people who are actually dying from overwork and lack of genuine relationships. They have a name for it: “Karoshi”.

      Without food, air, and water, we die. Without relationship, we die. God did not design us as human “doings.” All of our achievements and hard work are fine for this world but they are not our purpose. Work, school, family, and community are all there to provide us with one thing: the opportunity to be in authentic relationship with others. Everything we are involved in is simply a context in which we can connect with other people through the Holy Spirit. Authentic relationship is the only thing that will fill the hole of loneliness that cripples us and, in some cases, kills us.

      Even though authentic relationships are sometimes challenging, especially when we’re dealing with difficult people or situations, or when we’ve never experinced healthy relationships, God is there to lighten our load. In Matthew 11:28-30 he tells us:

      “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

      When we recognize that the Holy Spirit is present and let God do the heavy lifting, life is much less difficult than it otherwise would be! There is a joke that goes:

       What’s the difference between you and God? God doesn’t pretend to be you.

      We don’t have to try to be in control of anything. God’s got it covered. Sure, living life this way doesn’t happen overnight. The good news—no the great news—is that God gives us opportunities to practice every day. We don’t have to be great at having authentic exchanges right away; God allows us to practice, one interaction at a time.

      This past Christmas season my daughter and I spent a day together shopping. For me it was just so much fun to be with her and each of the shopkeepers, waitresses and cashiers we met. At the end of the day she told me, “Dad, people just love you. I don’t know how you do it.” It was an opportunity for me to share what I’m learning and to explain God’s role in it. There is nothing better than seeing love in action and I’m so grateful my daughter got to witness it first hand.

      In every interaction, we have the opportunity to create an authentic relationship whether it’s with someone we’ve known 10 seconds or someone we’ve known 10 years. With each person we meet, we can allow God to participate. In order for the other person to connect with Him through us, we must give up any selfish priorities. When people meet you, are they experiencing God or your ego? Is His plan or yours at work in the conversation? His plan is always better.

      What are some of the things we normally prioritize in interactions with others?

       being right

       getting our way

       being efficient

       getting things done

       getting something we need

       providing a service

      Once we recognize that there is a goal far beyond the worldly reason for our interaction every conversation is elevated to a heavenly purpose. We may or may not ever see or understand what God accomplished but, if we trust that He is there and using us, then we have done what we’re supposed to do. Interacting in this way means we put СКАЧАТЬ