Suck'd. Susan Berran
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Название: Suck'd
Автор: Susan Berran
Издательство: Ingram
Жанр: Учебная литература
Серия: The Freaky Series
isbn: 9780994275479
isbn:
This exciting series is about a boy just like you! What makes Sam just a little bit different sometimes, is that he escapes his mum and baby sister on the sort of escapades you have only dreamt of! Don’t you wish you could escape too at times? Well, when you join Sam on his amazing adventures, you’ll be there right alongside him. What are you waiting for? Join Sam on the adventure of a lifetime! Just make sure that you’re as brave and daring as he is, before you turn the first page …
Suck’d
Published by Susan Berran
First published 2015 by JoJo Publishing
This edition published 2017
Text Copyright © Susan Berran 2015, 2017
Illustrations Copyright © Susan Berran 2015, 2017
No part of this printed or video publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electrical, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the publisher and copyright owner.
National Library of Australia
Cataloguing-in-Publication data
Berran, Susan, 1962- author, illustrator.
Suck’d / Susan Berran (author and illustrator)
9780994275479 (eBook)
Berran, Susan, 1962-. Freaky ; 6.
For primary school age.
Children’s stories.
A823.4
Digital edition distributed by
Port Campbell Press
eBook Conversion by Winking Billy
Life totally sucks!
It’s been a sucky day, every day of this sucky week! And today has been the suckiest of all the sucky days of the whole suckfest of a week on this big sucky planet in the whole sucktacular universe!
My best mate Jared’s been away from school every single day of the week. Yeah, thanks a lot pal … not!
We always ride our bikes to school together. But on Monday, Jared was sooking and whinging about a massive headache and waffling something about feeling really crook. He reckons it kind of felt like someone had yanked out his stomach, filled it with mouldy green cheese and chucked it into a blender for an hour, before stuffing it back into his body. We even had to stop by the side of the road a couple of times on the way to school just so that he could chuck-up. Which was actually pretty AWESOMELY gross.
But at least it gave us the chance to play one of our all-time favourite games …
‘I Know What You Ate Before It Became An Awesome Pile Of Puke’ … which, by the way, Jared is the reigning supreme WORLD CHAMPION OF THE WHOLE ENTIRE UNIVERSE. But he cheated, of course. The last time I spewed, Jared knew exactly what I had to eat for dinner the night before because he’d come over to our place for tea that night.
We’ve played so many times now that I know whatever goes into Jared last, usually comes out first. Yep, backwards all the way from this morning’s breaky, to some sort of pudding after last night’s dinner, and all the way back to Fruit Loops for yesterday’s breaky.
Anyway, at our first stop on the way to school that day, Jared chucked-up a nice little load.
“Hmmm … more yellowy than usual … very smooth texture … smells slightly, sniff snifF … burnt I think … ummm … ohh, I’ve got it! You had scrambled eggs on toast for breaky this morning.”
“Wrong! When it went in it was boiled eggs and muffins,” Jared informed me, looking happy but weirdly pale.
“Rats!”
A couple of minutes later, we suddenly had to hit the brakes so Jared could offload into the dirt on the side of the road again.
“Hmmm … orange-coloured chunks … could be carrot, no … it had to be last night’s desert … I reckon it was … was … oh I know! Last night’s dessert was custard and peaches!”
“I’ll give ya half a point you’re sort of right. It was cheesecake and peaches,” he said, starting to go mouldy green.
We’d only just jumped back onto our bikes and gone another five or six metres when Jared needed to hurl … AGAIN!
I was beginning to think Jared wasn’t just chucking a sicky. Maybe he really was crook after all. And this time he brought up an entire smorgasbord of meat and at least three veggies and a heap of other grossly disgusting stuff. It was HUGE! This was going to take some real expert skill and keen observation to figure out.
“Hmm … let’s see now,” I said as I very closely inspected the humongous heap of revolting hurl. “It’s definitely dinner. Now let’s see … corn! Yep, there’s definitely corn.”
Everyone knows that there’s always corn. Even if you’ve never ever eaten it in your entire life, somehow whenever you throw up, there’s always corn. I actually reckon that everyone grows their very own corn plant in their body, just in case they ever get stuck on a deserted island or something. СКАЧАТЬ