Comedy of Marriage and Other Tales. Guy de Maupassant

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      MME. DE SALLUS

      Well, tell me, now, truly, how much has the one you liked best among all your numerous mistresses cost you, let us say—in three months?

      M. DE SALLUS

      I cannot tell.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Listen to me. I repeat the question. How much has the most charming of your numerous mistresses cost you in the space of three months—not only in money, but in gifts of jewelry, in dainty little suppers, in ceremonious dinners, in theater boxes—in everything?

      M. DE SALLUS

      How can I tell?

      MME. DE SALLUS

      You should be able to. Come, let us make an estimate. Did you give her a round sum, or did you pay for everything separately? However, I know you are not a man to bother over details, so I conclude that you gave her a round sum.

      M. DE SALLUS

      Madeline, you are absolutely unbearable.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Follow me closely. When you began to neglect me, you took away three horses from our stables—one of them was mine and the other two were yours. Then you took away a coachman and a footman; you then found it necessary to make me economize at home in order that you might be extravagant abroad.

      M. DE SALLUS

      That is not true.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Oh! yes, it is. I have every date; do not deny it, for I shall confound you if you do. You also stopped giving me jewels, for, of course, you had other ears, other fingers, other wrists, and other necks to adorn. You also deprived me of one of my nights at the Opéra, and I do not know how many other things less important. And all this, according to my idea, should mean about five thousand francs a month. Am I not right?

      M. DE SALLUS

      You may be, but you are mad.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      No, no, confess; did the most expensive one of your mistresses cost you about five thousand francs a month?

      M. DE SALLUS

      You are crazy.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      If you are going to answer me thus, I bid you good evening. [She rises as if to retire, but M. de Sallus interposes.]

      M. DE SALLUS

      Come now, Madeline, a truce to this jesting.

      MME. DE SALLUS [in a determined manner]

      Five thousand francs? Tell me, did she cost you five thousand francs?

      M. DE SALLUS [shrugs his shoulders]

      Oh, yes, thereabouts.

      MME. DE SALLUS [looks him straight in the face]

      Ah, ah! Well, listen. If you will give me immediately five thousand francs, you may be my husband for a month—but only a month.

      M. DE SALLUS

      You have lost your head!

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Well, farewell, good night!

      M. DE SALLUS

      What a farce! Stop, Madeline, let us talk seriously.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      About what?

      M. DE SALLUS

      Of—of—hang it—of my love for you.

      MME. DE SALLUS [archly]

      But that's not a serious question at all.

      M. DE SALLUS

      I swear it is!

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Hypocrite! You make me thirsty with so much talk. [Goes to a chiffonier, where there is a decanter and various liqueurs, and pours herself out a glass of water. At the instant she begins to drink, M. de Sallus steals up and kisses her on the back of the neck. She turns with a start and throws the glass of water in his face.]

      M. DE SALLUS

      I suppose you think that funny.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      It may or may not be. Certainly what you have done, or tried to do, was ridiculous.

      M. DE SALLUS

      Madeline, I ask—

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Five—thousand—francs.

      M. DE SALLUS

      But that would be idiotic.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      And why?

      M. DE SALLUS

      Ask me why a husband should pay his wife—his lawful wife—when he has the right?

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Oh, no, no. You may have the strength, but I can have my revenge.

      M. DE SALLUS

      Madeline—

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Five—thousand—francs.

      M. DE SALLUS

      I should be an object of ridicule forever if I were to pay my wife—yes—not only an object of ridicule, but an idiot, an imbecile.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Well, don't you think it is still more imbecile, when you have such a wife as I, to—to go outside and—pay mistresses?

      M. DE SALLUS

      Madeline, I confess it; but now—we are husband and wife, and it is not necessary to ruin me, is it?

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Allow me. When СКАЧАТЬ