Confessions of a School Nurse. Michael Alexander

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СКАЧАТЬ is always the last to leave. She’s even got her mum on her side, insisting I continue with her private lessons. She’s obsessed. She’s even said she’s got a surprise for my birthday next week.’

      I promised to pass on his concerns to the counsellor, although I didn’t think the matter urgent. ‘A bit of a crush,’ I remember saying so clearly. No one could have anticipated the surprise she had in store for him.

      It wasn’t just any birthday, it was Brian’s fortieth and understandably his students enjoyed teasing him about becoming officially old (or ‘ancient’, as they called it). Priscilla didn’t join in the banter, instead she enlisted the help of her peers.

      As Brian turned up to class the following week on the day of his birthday, he did what he always did at the start of a lesson and took the register. Everyone was present bar one. When he called out ‘Priscilla’ the music began.

      Priscilla entered the room, dressed in a flimsy white dress, and began to sing happy birthday. It wasn’t your typical ‘happy birthday’ where everyone joins in. Priscilla must have seen Marilyn Monroe singing happy birthday to a naughty president at some stage, and thought Brian would appreciate the gesture.

      What does one do when confronted by a flirtatious teenager?

      You politely interrupt, say ‘thank you’ and explain that the classroom is not the right place for such behaviour.

      Of course, it’s not always that easy. ‘She was so serious,’ Brian described later, ‘it would’ve crushed her if I’d made her stop straight away.’ Instead, he ended up saying things like ‘it’s unique’ and ‘unforgettable’ while trying to avoid actual words of encouragement.

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