I Love the Word Impossible. Ann Kiemel

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СКАЧАТЬ and it was a church conference. they

      walked back and forth as i leaned against a counter

      finally, i had the air lines page,

      “party meeting ann kiemel… please

      come to united’s information desk…”

      this couple did… only five feet away… just watching

      me. i smiled shyly, hoping they would respond.

      then i became paranoid.

      “what is it they don’t like about me? my dress

      is long. it has sleeves, the neckline is high, and i’m

      not gaudied up in jewelry. i’ve got sandals on,

      but…”

      suddenly the man, with wrinkled frown, called out,

      “do you know ann kiemel?”

      i spilled into smiles… “it’s me! i’m ann.”

      they didn’t smile. nor offer to carry my bag. they

      walked ahead of me in silence, and led me to their

      car parked at the far end of the airport. they

      crawled in the front seat and closed their doors,

      and i sheepishly got in back. nothing was said as we

      drove to the hotel. the man again parked far from

      the entrance, and neither helped me crawl out or

      offered to carry my things. when we got inside,

      they pressed the elevator button for the banquet

      room, and i became frantic…

      “sir, my room! i must change…”

      he shrugged his shoulders, so i marched to the desk

      and registered myself. and when i turned to go my

      eyes caught the wife with another woman, shaking

      her head in negative dismay.

      when i got to my room, i fell across the bed

      and sobbed.

      “Jesus, i can’t go down there to that banquet.

      they don’t like me. i won’t fit in. i’m going to

      be rejected without even being heard. i’m so

      scared…”

      for a few minutes, i forgot time. i didn’t care. i

      could only wail. then i pulled myself up, washed

      my face, changed clothes and walked out with a

      straight back, my head high, and my eyes very red.

      someone there had faith enough to call me to do

      this, and God would help me. i walked into the

      large banquet room, and was instantly greeted by

      warm, charming people with strong handshakes

      and wide smiles. i couldn’t even find the couple

      who picked me up…

      until afterward.

      after i had spoken, and God had powerfully

      graced the evening, then they decided i was

      “okay”… the little wife grabbed me and led

      me through the crowd, telling everyone she

      and her husband had brought me from the

      airport. sighhhhhh.

      i have flown next to someone who poured a whole

      can of beer in her lap… another who had an awful

      case of nausea which made me almost have one

      too. people have whisked me into an enormous,

      cold auditorium on a stormy night, and i was genuinely

      at God’s mercy to bring some warmth and

      beauty. in one city, it was over a hundred degrees

      outside, 800 people were packed into a high school

      auditorium where the air conditioning had failed

      and babies screamed and 300 fans waved vigorously.

      i wondered if i could possibly communicate

      through all that… and i can testify that God has

      been absolutely faithful. He’s come through every

      time.

      it makes me laugh now when i think of youth

      camps and summer retreats where i’ve been

      dropped off at the “workers’ cabin”… some

      workers’ cabins have spiders on the walls and

      musty smells, and i’m not a very good “rougher.”

      the lovely part is that it takes only a few hours until

      everyone belongs, and i feel so much a part, and

      rather than the awful loneliness at first, i begin to

      feel a kindred spirit, enriched and graced and

      mellowed by the earthly goodness of others. and i

      find myself going to sleep without being afraid of

      bugs.

      probably women with homes and husbands and

      children forget those parts of traveling and being

      “public”… and i forget that with husbands and

      children come meals to prepare and laundry to do

      and floors to keep scrubbed and noses wiped and

      lunches to pack. i think we are both lucky. God has

      a creative way of giving the romantic and awe-inspiring

      and bright without ignoring the humdrum

      and nitty-gritty and sobering.

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