And Then. Soseki Natsume

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СКАЧАТЬ to learn his new job well. In fact, he had even thought of doing—if given permission—a theoretical study of actual business practices. But his position was not high enough, and he had had to put away his plans and await a future opportunity. Even so, he had tried presenting a number of suggestions to the branch manager, though they had always met with cold indifference. If he so much as mentioned any sophisticated theory, the manager became peevish. His attitude seemed to be, what could a greenhorn like Hiraoka possibly understand? But the manager himself knew nothing. As Hiraoka saw it, his superior was unwilling to deal with him not because he, Hiraoka, was unworthy, but because the manager was afraid. And this was the source of Hiraoka’s chagrin. More than once they had verged on a clash.

      As time passed, however, Hiraoka’s annoyance began to fade, and he increasingly felt comfortable in his surroundings. He made an effort to feel that way, and accordingly, the branch manager’s attitude toward him changed bit by bit. There were even times when he took the initiative to ask Hiraoka’s opinion. And since Hiraoka was no longer fresh out of the university, he was careful to avoid complex issues that would be incomprehensible, hence awkward, for the manager.

      “But it’s not as if I went out of my way to flatter him or manipulate him,’’ Hiraoka emphasized.

      Daisuke answered solemnly, “No, of course not.”

      The branch manager began to show concern for Hiraoka’s future. He even promised, half jokingly, that since it was his turn to return to the main office, Hiraoka should go with him. By that time Hiraoka was quite experienced and had gained considerable trust; his social circles had widened, and he no longer had time for study. At that point, he had begun to feel that study would only get in the way of practice anyway.

      Just as the branch manager confided everything to him, so Hiraoka had trusted in a subordinate named Seki and consulted him on various matters. This Seki became involved with a geisha and ended up embezzling company funds. When this was exposed, there was no question of Seki’s dismissal, of course, but due to circumstances, it seemed that even the manager might be placed in an awkward situation. Hiraoka had shouldered the responsibility and submitted his resignation.

      This was the gist of Hiraoka’s story. Daisuke thought that Hiraoka might have been urged by the manager to tender his resignation, to judge from his last words, “The higher you get in a company, the more you can get away with. If you think about it, it’s really too bad that a fellow like Seki had to get fired for embezzling a piddling sum like that.”

      “So the branch manager’s got the best deal of all?” Daisuke asked. “I guess you could look at it that way.” Hiraoka’s response was slurred.

      “What happened to the money that fellow took?”

      “Oh, it didn’t amount to much, so I paid it off.”

      “I’m surprised you had it. It looks as if you were getting a pretty good deal too.”

      Hiraoka’s face turned bitter, and he darted a sharp glance at Daisuke. “Even if I was, it’s all gone. Now I’m having a tough time just making ends meet. I borrowed that money.”

      “Oh.” Daisuke’s response was calm. He was a man who did not lose his normal tone of voice under any circumstances. And from this tone, subdued but no less apparent, there emerged a note of leisure.

      “I borrowed from the manager to cover up that hole.”

      “I wonder why he didn’t lend to this fellow Seki himself.”

      Hiraoka did not answer and Daisuke did not press the issue. The two walked on in silence.

      Daisuke guessed that Hiraoka had not told all, but he knew he did not have the right to take another step forward in pursuit of the truth. Furthermore, he was too much an urbanite to have his curiosity aroused over something like this. Daisuke, who lived in twentiethcentury Japan, Daisuke, who had barely reached the age of thirty, had already arrived at the province of nil admirari. His thinking was hardly so unsophisticated as to be shocked by an encounter with the darker side of man. His senses were hardly so wearied as to take pleasure in sniffing at the hackneyed secrets Hiraoka might harbor. Or, from another angle, one might say they were so fatigued that stimuli many times more pleasurable could not have satisfied them.

      Thus had Daisuke evolved in his private, distinctive world, which bore almost no resemblance to Hiraoka’s. (It is a regrettable phenomenon that behind every evolution, past and present, lies regression.) But Hiraoka knew nothing of Daisuke’s development. He seemed to regard him as the same naive youth of three years ago. If he were to bare his soul before this little master and confide to him all his weaknesses, it might be like a farmhand’s tossing horse manure before the startled young lady of the house. Better not take such a risk and incur Daisuke’s displeasure—this was how Daisuke read Hiraoka’s thoughts. It seemed to him stupid that Hiraoka walked along without answering him. To the extent that Hiraoka regarded him as a child— perhaps even more so—Daisuke had begun to view Hiraoka in the same light. But when the two resumed their conversation some two or three blocks later, not a trace of this feeling showed.

      “So, what are you planning to do from now on?” “Well …”

      “Maybe, with all the experience you’ve built up, it would be best to stay in the same business?”

      “Well, that would depend on the circumstances. Actually, I’ve been meaning to talk it over with you. What do you think, is there a chance I could get something in your brother’s company?”

      “I’ll ask him about it; I have to go home anyway in the next two or three days. But I wonder …”

      “If there isn’t anything in business, I’m thinking of trying the newspapers.”

      “That might not be bad either.”

      The two walked toward the streetcar stop. Hiraoka, who had been watching the top of the train approaching in the distance, suddenly announced that he was going to take it. Daisuke assented without attempting to detain him, but neither did he make any move to part. He walked on to the red pole marking the stop. There he asked, “How’s Michiyo-san?”

      “She’s the same as ever, thanks. She sends her regards. I was going to bring her today, but the train ride must not have agreed with her; she was complaining of a headache so I left her at the inn.”

      The streetcar came to a halt before the two. Hiraoka started to hurry toward it, but stopped at Daisuke’s warning. It was not his train.

      “That was a shame about the baby.”

      “Yes, it was too bad. Thanks for your card. It might as well not have been born if it was going to die.”

      “And—since then?”

      “No, nothing yet. There’s probably no chance now. Her health isn’t too good.”

      “Well, when you’re moving around like this, it’s probably easier not to have a kid.”

      “That’s true, too. Maybe if I were single like you, it’d be even better—more relaxed.”

      “Well, why not become single?”

      “Don’t kid me. Anyway, my wife keeps wondering if you’ve go tten married yet:’

      The streetcar arrived.

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