The Complete Plays of J. M. Barrie - 30 Titles in One Edition. Джеймс Барри

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      PROCTOR (not heeding). Away!

      SIM. Him that dangled after her!

      PROCTOR. Hurray!

       (addressing PRESS STUDENTS). To catch an undergraduate I came.

      SIM and GREG (perplexed). Of this there’s question none,

       He is an undergraduate,

       In all respects but one.

       That one to mention we forgot,

       It’s odd to me and mate,

       It’s this, that somehow he is not

       An undergraduate!

      JACK steps forward, CADDIE holding him.

      ALL. Why, evidently he is not

       An undergraduate!

      MILLY (from balcony). Oh, sir, take care

       Of one so fair

       Let his complexion

       Plead with you for him!

      JACK. An officer I,

       Strolling by,

       Smoking a Henry Clay,

       These men I met,

       They me beset

       In a most unseemly way.

       Of girls they spoke,

       Which spoilt my smoke,

       For the sex I do not care about.

       I’ve not address’t

       Them e’en in jest

       Since ‘85 — or there about.

       They dragged me here,

       By brute force sheer,

       But this doth chiefly jar.

       Your page, I find,

       We left behind

       Smoking my big cigar.

       And therefore I

       Your school defy,

       Oh, I do not stand in awe of you;

       For spoilt have they

       My Henry Clay,

       And I mean to have the law of you.

       Exit JACK.

       Re-enter GIRLS.

      PROCTOR. No I am trepanned and done brown.

      PRESS STUDENTS. We hear you, and we’ve got it down.

       Enter MISS SIMS and JANE ANNIE.

      MISS SIMS (to JANE ANNIE). We owe all too you, it appears! So what can I do?

      GIRLS. Box her ears!

      JANE ANNIE. To be good I try hard,

      GIRLS. Ain’t she meek?

      JANE ANNIE. And I ask no reward,

      GIRLS. Oh, the sneak!

      JANE ANNIE. Yet if I should take

       Something nice,

       They may learn to forsake

       Ways of vice.

      PRESS STUDENTS. Stop a moment—”Forsake!” “Ways of vice!”

      JANE ANNIE. Now the good-conduct prize,

      GIRLS. Oh, how mean!

      JANE ANNIE. Seems good to my eyes,

      GIRLS. Which are green!

      JANE ANNIE. So if you agree

       That I’m right,

       Why not give it me

       Well — tonight?

      PRESS STUDENTS. Stop a moment—”Agree” “To tonight.”

      MISS SIMS. Dear pupils, see, to my bosom I fold her,

       The prize shall be hers ere she’s five minutes older.

       Exeunt MISS SIMS, PROCTOR, BULLDOGS, and CADDIE.

      JANE ANNIE. The girl who’s good, demure, correct,

       Cannot preserve her self-respect,

       And mine I would regain.

       So having got the prize tonight,

       Tomorrow I, with all my might,

       Will be an imp again!

       Girls, I am naughty from this hour,

       And six long months of wickedness,

       By virtue of my magic power,

       Into one day I will compress!

      ALL. Jane Annie’s naughty from this hour,

       But oh! what is this magic power?

      CADDIE sends PRESS STUDENTS away.

      SONG. — JANE ANNIE.

       When I was a little piccaninny,

       Only about so high,

       I’d a baby’s bib and a baby’s pinny

       And a queer little gimlet eye.

       They couldn’t tell why that tiny eye

       Would make them writhe and twist,

       They found it so, but how could they know

       That the babe was a hypnotist?

      ALL. Now think of that! this tiny brat

       Was a bit of a hypnotist!

      JANE ANNIE. And as I grew my power grew too,

       For we were one, you see,

       And what I willed the folk would do

       At a wave or a glance from me.

       I could “suggest” what pleased me best,

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