Дживс, вы – гений! / Thank you, Jeeves!. Пелам Гренвилл Вудхаус
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Название: Дживс, вы – гений! / Thank you, Jeeves!
Автор: Пелам Гренвилл Вудхаус
Издательство: Издательство АСТ
Жанр: Зарубежная классика
Серия: Эксклюзивное чтение на английском языке
isbn: 978-5-17-108228-4
isbn:
Chuffy shook his head.
“Of course I don’t.”
“You do.”
“I don’t.”
“Yes, you do.”
“I don’t think anything of the kind,” said Chuffy. “I know that Bertie has been sleeping in a shed,” continued Chuffy. “But that’s not the point. The fact remains that in spite of being engaged to me, you are still so much in love with Bertie that you can’t keep away from him. You think I don’t know all about your being engaged to him in New York, but I do. Oh, I’m not complaining, you have a perfect right to love who you like—”
“Whom, old man,” I corrected him.
“Will you keep quiet!”
“Of course, of course.”
“Shut up!”
“Sorry, sorry. Shan’t occur again[74].”
“Well, then, perhaps you’ll listen to what I’m going to say. I suppose you have no objection to my putting in a word?” said Pauline.
“None,” said Chuffy.
“None, none,” I said.
Pauline was very angry. I could see her toes wiggling.
“In the first place, you make me sick!”
“Indeed?”
“Yes, indeed. In the second place, I hope I shall never see you again in this world or the next.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. I hate you. I wish I’d never met you. I think you’re a worse pig than any you’ve got up at that beastly house of yours.”
This interested me.
“I didn’t know you kept pigs, Chuffy.”
“Black Berkshires[75],” he said absently. “Well, if that’s how you feel, well, all right.”
“My Uncle Henry—” I began.
“Bertie,” said Chuffy.
“Hallo?”
“I don’t want to hear about your Uncle Henry. I am not interested in your Uncle Henry. It will be all right with me if your damned Uncle Henry dies.”
“Too late, old man. He passed away three years ago. Pneumonia. I was only saying he kept pigs. It’s very profitable.”
“Will you stop—”
“Yes, and will you,” said Pauline. “Are you going to spend the night here? I wish you would leave me.”
“I will,” said Chuffy.
“Do,” said Pauline.
“Good night,” said Chuffy. “But one last word—”, he said with a wide, passionate gesture. His knuckles hit a projecting beam[76], he danced in agony, overbalanced, and the next moment was on the ground floor.
Pauline Stoker ran to the banisters and looked over.
“Are you hurt?” she cried.
“Yes,” yelled Chuffy.
“Good,” cried Pauline.
She came back into the room.
10
Another Visitor
Pauline picked up her bathing suit.
“Go away, Bertie,” she said.
“But listen—”
“I want to change.”
“Change what?”
“Put on my swimming suit.”
“Why?”
“Because I am going to swim.”
“Swim?”
“Swim.”
I stared.
“You aren’t going back to the yacht?”
“I am going back to the yacht.”
“But I wanted to talk about Chuffy.”
“I never wish to hear his name mentioned again.”
“Oh, come!”
She looked at me.
“A girl and a bloke can say lots of things she or he doesn’t mean.”
“Oh? Well, let me tell you I meant every word I said. I told him I never wanted to speak to him again. I don’t. I told him I hated him. I do. I called him a pig. He is.”
“Aren’t you a bit hard?”
“Am I?”
“And rather rough on Chuffy?”
“Am I?”
“You wouldn’t say his attitude was excusable?”
“I would not.”
“I think it was a shock for the poor old chap, I mean, finding you here.”
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