The Female of the Species. Lionel Shriver

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       chapter four

      I’ve decided what to do with you,” said Charles cheerfully the next morning. He was shaving, with a sheet of polished aluminum from the siding of his airplane propped up for a mirror.

      “Oh?” asked Gray warily, still groggy and on the floor.

      “Yes.” Charles raised his chin in the air to sweep the razor underneath. “I’ve decided to let you go.”

      The blade made a sheer scraping sound that raised the hair on Gray’s arms. “I did not come here,” said Gray, “to go.”

      “You shouldn’t have come here at all,” said Charles. “You made a mistake. Usually when we make mistakes, that’s it. But: you are dealing with Little Jesus. You have your own personal fairy godfather. Click your heels together and in your case it will work.”

      Gray picked herself up in order to get a better view of his face. Charles did not look at her but scrutinized his chin more closely. There was a bullet hole in the siding, and his stubble distorted and rippled in the aluminum.

      “Aren’t you concerned that I’ll tell?” asked Gray slowly. “About you? About Toroto?”

      “Now, why would you do that? When I’ve been so gracious? And these people have someone to take care of them?”

      Charles may not have been looking at Gray, but Gray was certainly looking at Charles now, very very carefully. “Because I’m an anthropologist. I’d want to come back with reinforcements.”

      “So military! And I thought we were friends.”

      “You’re the one who sees this village as one more battle of World War II.”

      “Against them, not you, sweetheart.”

      “Sweetheart is on their side.”

      Charles clucked his tongue. “No racial loyalty.”

      “The point is, I’d have every reason to return here with company. You’ve murdered people here. This is a British colony. You could be arrested.”

      “Miss Kaiser, are you trying to convince me to shoot you?”

      “I’m not telling you anything you haven’t already thought about.”

      Charles said nothing. It seemed to Gray he should have finished shaving by now. His face looked smooth. Still, Charles picked at individual patches with great attention.

      “What are you planning to do, turn me loose in the bush? I had a guide to get here. How would I find my way out?”

      “You could have an escort partway. Why, maybe the Tooth Fairy himself would help you up the cliffs.”

      “Maybe I’ll stay here.”

      “Sorry. No room at the inn. Booked for the season. Manger’s filled, too. One Jesus per village. It’s checkout time.”

      “When those Jews were gassed in the camps,” said Gray softly, “they were told they were going to take a shower.”

      Charles turned toward her finally and looked her in the eye. He said nothing. His eyes were large and deep and black and hard to read. The muscles in his face did not move.

      “All right,” said Gray. “Maybe you hadn’t decided. But it had occurred to you. There was a good chance.”

      Still, he said nothing.

      “It makes you feel a little funny, doesn’t it?” said Gray. “You think because I’m white, American, it’s different. But you also know, deep down, that it’s no different, and that you could do it.”

      It was a strange moment. Charles still wouldn’t speak. There was nothing else for Gray to do but keep going. “I just feel we should discuss this, since I plan on staying here a while. For example, I find it pretty amazing that anyone could be so convinced of his own personal importance that no one’s sacrifice is too great. I mean, how many people, Charles? Is there any limit? You and Adolf. You may not like him, but. How many, Lieutenant?”

      Charles seemed almost to smile. He turned his head a few degrees and looked at Gray from an angle. He pointed his forefinger slowly at her chest. “I don’t believe you,” he said at last.

      “What?”

      “I don’t believe you’re amazed. That you don’t understand.” Charles took his rifle from against the wall and slid it onto the table in front of her. “There. If you thought you could get away with it. If there weren’t several hundred religious fanatics outside that door. Would you use this? On me?”

      This time it was Gray’s turn to be quiet.

      “See?” said Charles. “If you climbed out of your cockpit a little dazed from an insanely lucky crash landing and you were surrounded by crouching men with sharp poles, would you be willing to shoot just one of them to make a point?”

      Gray said nothing.

      “And if one, why not two, if that’s what it took? And maybe, Miss Kaiser, over five years it would take even more than two.”

      Gray stared down at the gun. “So is everyone like this?”

      Charles СКАЧАТЬ