A Man of his Time. Alan Sillitoe

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СКАЧАТЬ it was far too early. ‘Was the poor man dead?’

      ‘He could have been. He wasn’t moving when he was on the ground among the nettles.’ He liked the nettles part, amazed at what his lips came out with when he got going. ‘But just as the train was starting two constables lifted him on a cart and took him away to the infirmary. Unless the morgue was the place they had in mind.’

      It was wrong to tell lies, but a plain tale to console was something else, and he waited for more words from her, though if they didn’t come it would be no loss to him. George always said there was a time to speak and a time to keep quiet, and you should always know when. If you let others speak it saved you bothering, and you might get to know something. Only talk when you knew what you wanted to say before opening your mouth. Then close it when you’d finished. On the other hand words could be like tadpoles. You might have them by the tail but they often slipped out.

      Land rose mountainously to either side, the train spindling a river whose name he didn’t know, fields and rivers much the same everywhere. The lovely woman was so shy he forgot, his intention not to speak till she did. In any case he wondered about the wedding ring. ‘Are you travelling far, miss?’

      She stared numbly. ‘I’m a married woman.’ A young and handsome man was only trying to be kind. ‘Not very far. I shall be alighting at Newbridge.’

      George had mentioned it as two stops before his, so she would need his help at Pontypool on changing to the Swansea line. ‘My name’s Ernest Burton,’ he said, now that the waters of her speech had been broken. ‘But call me plain Burton. Everybody does. I’m going a bit beyond Newbridge, where my brother has a smithy. He tells me it’s a dirty little hole, though good for business.’

      ‘You could say the same about most settlements in the coalfields.’ She flushed, as if not sure her judgement was reasonable.

      ‘You’re in black, I see.’ Hardly possible not to, but what could you say? Her ability to speak seemed an accomplishment, so he had to come out with something. ‘You have my condolences,’ hoping that whatever happened had been long enough ago.

      ‘Thank you.’ Tears shone like pearls on her pale cheeks, and the ironed handkerchief from his pocket was there before she could pull hers from the muff, which she accepted as one was entitled to do in the land of mourning, so that if nothing else happened he’d kiss the memory of her cheeks on soft cotton as long as the imprint lasted.

      ‘My husband died three weeks ago.’ She looked towards the luggage rack, as if his image might appear by Ernest’s shoulder or as if, he thought, his body might be in the portmanteau.

      Killed by a horse? Sunk with delirium tremens? Bludgeoned to death by a footpad? Got consumption and coughed himself to death? Suffered a growth? Had a seizure? He tried to guess. ‘That’s a terrible thing to have happened.’

      The young man was as if sent by Our Lord to comfort her. ‘He was an engineer at a coalmine in Staffordshire.’

      ‘Such places are dangerous. I’ve never been down one.’

      Another dab at her left eye. ‘I wish my husband hadn’t. It took all day to find his body under the coal, but the undertaker did a beautiful job.’

      And so he should. Every man must know his trade. One of them would already be working on the chap who had jumped from the train near Derby – if it had happened – which he was about to mention but was glad he didn’t, because she said: ‘I’m going to live with my sister. My other possessions will go on by carrier.’

      Church books in the portmanteau were too precious to be trusted to the road. Her grief was tempered by an air of tenderness in a compartment growing smaller by the minute, a loosening in her, as if she didn’t know where she was, or what she was doing or, what was better, wasn’t able to know – like the effect of a tot of whisky.

      He felt as if alone with a woman in a meadow on a warm spring day, knowing there was only one thing to do before dusk came on. The unexpected sense of levity and opportunity was more than welcome, though he wondered whether it was only in him, at the same time sure a good measure came from her, pious as a dormouse or not.

      He held her cold hands to give comfort, as a man should, his as ever hot, large compared to hers, a sheltering stove she couldn’t refuse. ‘What about your children?’

      ‘There aren’t any, which I suppose has turned out for the best, though I’m sorry the Good Lord didn’t bless me with some.’

      Her husband’s spunk had been no good. ‘Was he a great age?’

      ‘He was twenty years older, a good and upright man.’

      He would be, at that age. ‘I’m sure he was.’ Breath and body heat thickened the air between them. If this goes on we’ll need to be prised apart with a chisel. Time to get going, though not sure how she would take it. Moving to her side was a better place to console, seeing as how she needed him, but the goodness of his heart brought on more weeping, which wasn’t the ticket at all.

      A passenger looked in for a seat but, unwilling to intrude on mutual and private grief, stepped down. A chink in the blind showed the train steaming along a valley, its whistle permitting them to do what they would, his only hope that no one else would try to get into the carriage.

      He secured the blinds, and put his lips to her warm forehead. Hers were moist with a kiss no man could resist, or care what was behind it. A hand around her neck, the other at her well-covered bosom, he took in the rich clean odour of hair, yet held back from going like a bull at a gate, the urge to be fast a sure sign that you must go slowly.

      She turned away, but a kiss at the nape of the neck always got them on the melt, Bible books in the portmanteau no defence for a woman’s flesh whose gander was up. A sudden leaning forward told him she knew it was too late to hold back, though any sign and he would have stepped up and asked her pardon. Men were rightly prosecuted for bothering women in trains, and the treadmill wasn’t for him.

      A sudden jerk and she crushed herself to him, saying softly: ‘Oh, do take me, then.’

      Not to accept her would be unmanly. He lifted her, a free hand drawing his raincoat from the rack to lay on the seat, using all his strength to let her down as if onto a bed of feathers. Clothed arms rustled around his neck, till the seat vibrated under her, carmine features contrasting with the black of mourning as she held out her arms.

      No more waiting, he bundled up the complication of skirts, and she drew him through smells of lavender and sweat to the greed of that vital place. All control was given up as if only now able to allow it after her husband’s death. He held back to match her eagerness but she was determined not to let him (which couldn’t be held against her) and spent more quickly even than Leah.

      An hour ago they hadn’t known each other, but she must have been half in death for it, the stars fixed that he would be the one to be drawn by her so completely. Glad that she had reason to be pleased with taking him as much as he had taken her, he was also amazed at a coupling of so few words, when with others he’d used many in his persuasions, Nottingham girls brazenly expecting them so as to save, he supposed, what they thought of as their modesty.

      Her smile could only be for the ironic twist to his lips while she went back to her status of bereaved woman. The handkerchief that had dried her tears was used to wipe between her legs, as he stood away to fix his buttons. She held out her hand when he moved to put the soiled handkerchief into his bag of tools, demanding it for her reticule, then arranged her dress СКАЧАТЬ