The Map of True Places. Brunonia Barry

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СКАЧАТЬ the relationship between Hawthorne and Sophia was a legendary love story, the kind Maureen had always wished she could find for herself. The fact that it was a true story, and one her mother had loved so much, made it sacred for Zee. Although her father was one of the country’s preeminent Hawthorne scholars and, as such, had more intimate knowledge of Hawthorne than Zee would ever have, that didn’t make it any easier for Zee to handle. From the time she was little, Finch’s love of Hawthorne had made the writer’s life almost as real to her as her own, but until recently she had never heard Finch’s theory about Hawthorne and Melville. Maybe it was some kind of misplaced loyalty to her mother, or the desperate hope that The Great Love really did exist, but Zee hated the idea that Finch was messing with the story of Hawthorne and Sophia.

      She felt her face getting hot. She could see Melville watching her. Not wanting to ruin the evening, she excused herself from the table. “I forgot to feed the meter,” she said, standing too quickly, almost knocking over her glass of wine. “I’ll be right back.”

      She walked out the front door and onto the street. The truth was, she had parked in the lot and not at a meter. She walked halfway down the block before she stopped.

      It was Melville finally, and not Finch, who caught up with her. She could feel him standing behind her on the corner. He didn’t speak, but she could sense his presence. At last she turned around.

      “I’m sorry,” he said.

      She just stared at him.

      “I had no idea he was going to write that dedication.”

      “Right,” she said. She realized as she looked at him that it was probably true. She had noticed the expression on his face when he opened the book, the quick glance that passed between them. Finch loved him. That was the truth of it. They loved each other.

      “Hawthorne adored his wife,” she said to him. “There are volumes dedicated to that fact.”

      “I don’t think anyone is disputing that,” Melville said.

      “His whole book is disputing that.”

      “I’ve read it,” Melville said. “It isn’t.”

      They stood together on the sidewalk. People walked around them.

      “It’s possible to truly love more than one person in this life,” Melville said. “Believe me, I know.”

      She regarded him strangely. It was the first time she’d ever heard Melville say anything so revealing about his past.

      She had no idea what to say.

      “This night means so much to him,” Melville said.

      He wasn’t telling her how to feel; he was just telling her what was true.

      She felt stupid standing here, like a kid who had just thrown a tantrum. It surprised her. “I don’t know why that got to me.”

      “I think it’s fairly obvious,” Melville said.

      “You know that I believe you two belong together.”

      “Of course,” Melville said.

      “It’s just the way he does things sometimes. It brought everything back.”

      “I know,” Melville said, putting his hand on her shoulder. “Come on inside with me.”

      They walked back together. Finch was sitting alone at the table, looking confused. She kissed his cheek.

      “I’m sorry,” she said. “My car was about to be ticketed. Lucky for me Melville had quarters.”

      Finch looked so relieved that Zee almost cried. The book sat on the table where she had left it. She picked it up and turned it over, reading the blurbs on the back. A picture of a younger-looking Finch stared out at her from the jacket cover. He was standing in front of the House of the Seven Gables. “To those hedges,” she said, raising her glass.

      She could see Melville’s amusement at her toast. As much as she resented him sometimes, Melville was one of the only people in the world who truly got her.

      They ordered dinner and drank several glasses of wine.

      Since the celebration was in Finch’s honor, Melville had planned to pick up the tab. But Finch wouldn’t hear of it and insisted on paying. The bill came to $150, but Finch laid down $240 in cash, unusual for him, as a frugal Yankee. Melville reached over and retrieved three twenties. “I think these bills were stuck together,” he said, handing them back to Finch. “Damned ATMs.”

      Finch looked surprised and then slightly embarrassed. He stuffed the returned bills into his pocket.

      Zee could see that he was genuinely confused.

      “What’s the matter with my father?” she called to ask Melville the next morning. She was moving between classes, and the reception on her cell phone kept cutting in and out.

      “He had a lot of wine,” Melville said.

      “He always has a lot of wine.”

      “Maybe the bills really did get stuck together.”

      “Right,” Zee said.

      At Melville’s insistence Finch had already made an appointment with his primary-care physician. Zee said she would prefer for him to see a neurologist in Boston.

      She felt relief for about sixty seconds when the neurologist said it wasn’t Alzheimer’s.

      “It’s Parkinson’s,” the doctor told them.

      Now, almost ten years later, it took Finch more than a minute to shuffle to the other side of the doctor’s office.

      “Good,” the neurologist said. “Though you really should be using your walker. Any falls since your last visit?”

      “No,” Finch said.

      “What about freezing?”

      “No,” Finch said. “No freezing.”

      The doctor pulled out a piece of graph paper and once again drew the wavy curves he’d drawn for them at every appointment they’d been to for the last ten years. He drew a straight line through the middle, the ideal spot indicating normal dopamine levels, the one that meant the meds were working. The waves seemed larger and farther apart in this new drawing, the periods of normalcy much shorter.

      “The idea is to try to keep him in the middle,” the doctor said.

      She knew well what the idea was. At the high point of the wave, there was too much dopamine and Finch’s limbs and head moved on their own, a slow, loopy movement that made him look almost as if he were swimming. At the low point on the wave, Finch was rigid and anxious. All he wanted to do then was to pace, but his stiffness made any movement almost impossible, and he was likely to fall.

      “It’s a pity he didn’t respond to the time-release when we tried that,” the doctor said. “And the agonists clearly aren’t working for him. As you were СКАЧАТЬ