A Year with the Saints. Anonymous

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      22. He who is truly humble must desire in truth to be despised, mocked, persecuted, and blamed, although wrongfully. If he wishes to imitate Christ, how can he do it better than in this way? Oh, how wise will he, one day, be seen to be, who rejoiced in being accounted vile and even a fool! for such was wisdom itself esteemed.----St. Teresa

      Cassian narrates of the Abbot Paphnutius that, being Superior of a monastery and much revered and esteemed by his monks on account of his venerable age and admirable life, he disliked so much honor, and preferring to see himself humiliated, forgotten and despised, he left the monastery secretly, by night, in the dress of a secular. He then went to the monastery of St. Pachomius, which was at a great distance from his own, and remained many days at the gate, humbly asking for the habit. He prostrated himself before the monks, who scornfully reproached him with having spent his life in the enjoyment of the world and then coming at last to serve God, urged by necessity, because he had no means of living. Finally, moved by his urgent entreaties, they gave him the habit, with the charge of the garden, assigning to him another monk as his superior, to whom he was to look for everything. Now, not content with performing his duties with great exactness and humility, he consequently took pains to do all that the rest avoided----all the lowest and most disagreeable tasks in the house----and would often rise secretly in the night and do many things that the others were to perform, so that in the morning they would wonder, not knowing how their work came to be done. He continued to live in this manner for three years, much pleased with the good opportunity he had to labor and be despised, which was the thing he had so greatly desired. Meanwhile his monks, feeling grievously the loss of such a Father, had gone out in different bands to seek him; they finally found him as he was manuring the ground, and threw themselves at his feet. The bystanders were amazed, but still more so when they heard that this was Paphnutius, whose name was so celebrated among them; and they immediately asked his pardon. The holy old man wept at his misfortune in having been discovered through the envy of the demon, and at having lost the treasure which he had seemed to find. Even by force he was carried back to his monastery, where he was received with indescribable gladness, and watched and guarded with the utmost diligence, that he might not again escape.

      23. If we should well consider all that is human and imperfect in us, we should find but too much cause to humiliate ourselves before God and men, even before our inferiors.----St. Vincent de Paul

      A holy woman, once having asked light of the Lord that she might know herself well, saw so much ugliness and so many miseries in her own heart that, not being able to bear the sight, she prayed to God to relieve her from such distress; for she said if it had lasted longer she would have sunk under it.

      The venerable Mother Seraphina di Dio once had a very clear supernatural illumination which made her see her soul full of so many and such abominable faults that it seemed like a receptacle of all that was foul; and she judged it must be even worse in reality; for she said, "If I had more light, I should see more." "It has often come into my mind," she added, "to retire to some cave, when I think how little I exercise myself in virtue; as to humility, in particular, I seem to myself a Lucifer. Religion is beautiful for those who practice virtue, but not for me, who cultivate only vices." Therefore, when she received insults and contempt, she was never disturbed, nor complained, but said: "They speak well; they do well; that suits me well." Nor was any adversity or trial in her whole life ever sufficient to make her change her sentiments.

      24. In my opinion, we shall never acquire true humility unless we raise our eyes to behold God. Looking upon His greatness, the soul sees better her own littleness; beholding His purity, she is the more aware of her own uncleanness; considering His patience, she feels how far she is from being patient; in fine, turning her glance upon the Divine perfections, she discovers in herself so many imperfections that she would gladly close her eyes to them.----St. Teresa

      This was, in truth, one of the principal fountains from which St. Vincent de Paul drew that humble opinion which he had of himself, as well as his great desire for humiliations. That is to say, he derived them from the profound knowledge which he had of the infinite perfections of God, and of the extreme weakness and misery of creatures; so that he thought it a manifest injustice not to humiliate himself always and in all things. In a conference one day with his priests, he spoke thus: "In truth, if each of us will give his attention to knowing himself well before God, he will find it to be the most just and reasonable thing to despise and humble himself. For, if we seriously consider the natural and continual inclination we have to evil, our natural incapacity for good, and the experience we all have had that even when we think we have succeeded well in something and that our plans are wise, the matter often turns out quite different from our anticipations, and God permits us to be considered wanting in judgment; and that, finally, in all we think, say, or do, both in substance and circumstances, we are always filled and encompassed with motives for humiliation and confusion----how shall we not consider ourselves worthy to be repulsed and despised in reflecting upon such things, and in seeing ourselves so far from the holiness and sublime perfections of God, and from the marvellous operations of His grace, and from the life of Christ our Lord?"

      25. One who wishes to become truly holy ought not, except in a few unusual cases, to excuse himself, although that for which he is blamed be not true. Jesus Christ acted thus. He heard Himself charged with evil which He had not done, but said not a word to free Himself from the disgrace.----St. Philip Neri

      The Empress Leonora was treated by her mother always with harshness, and without any appearance of affection. For the smallest things that were observed by no one else, her mother reproved her sharply at every turn, and frequently struck her. The good child remained always in silence, with her eyes cast down, uttering not a word in her defense, still less complaining or weeping. Often when the tempest has passed, she would kneel and kiss her mother's feet, asking her pardon and promising amendment.

      St. Vincent de Paul never justified himself against the complaints and calumnies brought against him and his Congregation, whatever trouble or loss they might cause. Once when he had used his influence to prevent a bishopric from being conferred on one of his subjects, whom he considered unworthy of it, the disappointed candidate invented an enormous calumny against him, which came to the ears of the Queen. One day, meeting the Saint, she told him laughingly that he had been accused of such and such a thing. He calmly replied, "Madam, I am a great sinner." When her Majesty said that he ought to assert his innocence, he answered, "Quite as much was said against Christ our Lord, and He never justified Himself." It happened that, one time, in a public hall, a nobleman said that the missionary zeal of St. Vincent's followers had greatly cooled. When the Saint heard this, he would not say a word in defense, though he could easily have proved the contrary of the assertion, for in that year and the preceding more missions had been given than ever before. To one who urged him to take notice of the affair by telling him that this gentleman, though not knowing the truth, was continuing to speak evil of the Congregation, he answered, "We will let him talk. For my part, I will never justify myself except by my works." It chanced, one day, that a prelate, having summoned the Saint to an assembly where many persons of rank were present, reproved him publicly for a thing for which he was not at all to blame. But he, without a word of complaint or excuse, immediately knelt and asked pardon, to the great admiration of those present, to whom his innocence was known. One of them, a man of much piety and learning, after the assembly was over and the Saint was gone, said that he was a man of extraordinary virtue and of a supernatural and Divine spirit.

      The venerable Mother Seraphina never excused herself, even to her confessors, though they might blame her wrongfully; nor did she explain how matters really stood, unless obliged by obedience. Once, in particular, when she was sharply reproved by her director, though the thing laid to her charge was not true, she replied only: "You are right." Afterwards, he commanded her to tell him the truth, and on hearing it he was sorry for his wrongful accusations.

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