Potash & Perlmutter: Their Copartnership Ventures and Adventures. Glass Montague

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СКАЧАТЬ an impressive frown, he took from the well-stocked shelves that lined the walls book after book of digests and reports. Occasionally he made notes on the back of the envelope, and after the space of half an hour he returned to his chair and prepared to deliver himself of a weighty opinion.

      "In the first place," he said, "this man Grossman ain't incompetent in his work, is he?"

      "Incompetent!" Abe exclaimed. "Oh, no, he ain't incompetent. He's competent enough to sue us for five thousand dollars after we fire him, if that's what you mean."

      "Then I take it that you don't want to discharge him for incompetence and risk a law suit," Mr. Feldman went on. "Now, before we go on, how much does his share of your profits amount to each week?"

      "About thirty dollars in the busy season," Abe replied.

      "Then here's your scheme," said Feldman. "You go to Grossman and say: 'Look a-here, Grossman, this business of figuring out profits each week is a troublesome piece of bookkeeping. Suppose we call your share of the profits forty dollars a week and let it go at that.' D'ye suppose Grossman would take it?"

      "Would a cat eat liver?" said Abe.

      "Well, then," Feldman now concluded, "after Grossman accepts the offer, and you pay him the first installment of forty dollars you're substituting a new weekly contract in place of the old yearly one, and you can fire Grossman just as soon as you have a mind to."

      "But suppose he sues me, anyhow?" said Abe.

      "If he does," Feldman replied. "I won't charge you a cent; otherwise it'll be two hundred and fifty dollars."

      He touched the bell in token of dismissal.

      "This fellow, Grossman, is certainly a big money-maker," he said to himself, after Abe had gone, "for me."

      The following Saturday Abe sat in the show-room making up the weekly payroll, and with his own hand he drew a check to the order of Louis Grossman for forty dollars.

      "Mawruss," he said, "do me the favor and go upstairs to Louis Grossman. You know what to say to him."

      "Why should I go, Abe?" Morris said. "You know the whole plan. You saw Feldman."

      "But it don't look well for me," Abe rejoined. "Do me the favor and go yourself."

      Morris shrugged his shoulders and departed, while Abe turned to the pages of the Daily Cloak and Suit Record to bridge over the anxious period of Morris' absence. The first item that struck his eye appeared under the heading, "Alterations and Improvements."

      "The Bon Ton Credit Outfitting Company, Isaac Herzog, Proprietor," it read, "is about to open a manufacturing department, and will, on and after June 1, do all its own manufacturing and alterations in the enlarged store premises, Nos. 5940, 5942 and 5946 Second Avenue."

      Abe laid down the paper with a sigh.

      "There's where we lose another good customer," he said as Morris returned. A wide grin was spread over Morris' face.

      "Well, Mawruss?" Abe asked.

      "Yes, Abe," Morris replied. "Ten hundred and thirty-three, thirty-three you paid for him. And now you must pay him forty dollars a week. I ain't so generous, Abe, believe me. I settled with him for twenty-seven-fifty."

      "Well, Mawruss, it's only for one week," Abe protested.

      "I know," said Morris, "but why should he get the benefit of it?"

      "Did you have much of a time getting him to take it?" Abe asked.

      "It was like this," Morris explained. "I told him what you said about a lump sum in place of profits and asked him to name his price, and the first thing he says was twenty-seven-fifty."

      "And you let him have it for that?" Abe cried. "You're a business man, Mawruss, I must say. I bet yer he would have took twenty-five."

      He tore up the check for forty dollars and drew a new one for twenty-seven-fifty.

      "Here, Mawruss," he said, "take it up to him like a good feller."

      It was precisely noon when Morris delivered the check to Louis Grossman, and it was one o'clock when Louis went out to lunch.

      Three o'clock struck before Abe first noted his absence.

      "Ain't that feller come back from his dinner yet, Mawruss?" he asked.

      "No," Morris replied. "I wonder what can be keeping him. He generally takes half an hour for his dinner."

      At this juncture the telephone bell rang in the rear of the store and Abe answered it.

      "Hello," he said; "yes, this is Potash & Perlmutter. Oh, hello, Leon, what can we do for you?"

      "I want to speak to Louis Grossman. Can you call him to the 'phone?" Leon said.

      "Louis ain't in," Abe said. "Do you want to leave a message for him?"

      "Well," Leon hesitated, "the fact is—we had an appointment with him for two o'clock over here, and he ain't showed up yet."

      "Appointment with Louis!" Abe said. "Why, what should you have an appointment with Louis for, Leon?"

      "Well," Leon stammered, "I—now—got to see him—now—about them Arverne Sacques."

      "Oh!" Abe said. "I understand. Well, he went to lunch about twelve o'clock, and he ain't come back yet. Is there anything what we can do for you, Leon?"

      But Sammet had hung up the receiver without waiting for further conversation.

      At four o'clock the telephone rang again, and once more Abe answered it.

      "Hello," he said. "Yes, this is Potash & Perlmutter. Oh! hello, Leon! What can we do for you now?"

      "Abe," Leon said, "Louis ain't showed up yet. Has he showed up at your place yet?"

      "No, he ain't, Leon," Abe replied. "You seem mighty anxious to see him. Why, what for should I try to prevent him speaking to you? He ain't here, I tell you. All right, Leon; then I'm a liar."

      He hung up the receiver with a bang, and an hour later when Morris and he locked up the place, Louis' absence remained a complete mystery to his employers.

      On Monday morning Abe and Morris opened the store at seven-thirty, and while Morris examined the mail, Abe took up the Daily Cloak and Suit Record and scanned the business-trouble column. There were no failures of personal or firm interest to Abe, so he passed on to the new-business column. The first item caused him to gasp, and he almost swallowed the butt of his cigar. It read:

      A partnership has this day been formed between Isaac Herzog and Louis Grossman, to carry on the business of the Bon Ton Credit Outfitting Company, under the same firm name. It is understood that Mr. Grossman will have charge of the designing and manufacturing end of the concern.

      He handed the paper over to Morris and lit a fresh cigar.

      "Another sucker СКАЧАТЬ