Monsieur Cherami. Paul de Kock

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СКАЧАТЬ fun! For my part, I don't like to sweat; it uncurls my hair. Mon Dieu! what a crowd! It's all the rage now; no one is willing to go on foot, and there aren't enough 'buses."

      "Belleville! Faubourg du Temple!"

      "Ah! here it is! here it is!"

      Further evolutions performed by the stout woman, the two boys, and the servant, but with no greater success; there were four vacant seats, but there were other numbers before theirs. The two girls also came forward.

      "There's no more room, except on top," said the conductor.

      "All right! we don't care; we'll go on top."

      "Pardon! ladies are not allowed there."—And the conductor added, with a wink: "It isn't my fault, you know; nothing would suit me better."

      "I believe you," said a man in a blouse; "if women were allowed to climb up there, there's lots of men who would pay to be conductors."

      "Why do they say that?" the blonde asked her companion; "what good would it do the conductors to have women ride in the three-sou seats?"

      "Oh! what a fool you are, Lucie! What! don't you understand?"

      "Why, no."

      "Oh! you make me weary."

      "Never mind; tell me why?"

      "My dear girl, it's a matter of the point of view; that's all."

III

       THE YOUNG MAN FROM PLACE CADET

       Table of Contents

      An awkward, loutish youth entered the office.

      "Place Cadet, monsieur?"

      "This isn't the office; it's out on the boulevard, at the left, just at the corner."

      "Exceedingly obliged; will there be a seat?"

      "How do you expect us to know, when this isn't the office?"

      "Oh! of course; and that is where I must go for a number? Suppose you give me one, wouldn't that amount to the same thing?"

      "Why, no, monsieur; the 'bus doesn't stop here."

      "The 'bus is what I want to go on."

      "You can go on it or under it; it's none of our affair."

      "Do you mean that one can ride underneath?"

      The clerk concluded to turn his back on the stupid idiot who asked such questions. Mademoiselle Laurette, having overheard the dialogue, burst out laughing, as she said:

      "I'd have sent that fellow to the deuce in short measure. What a booby! You must need a good stock of patience to answer all those questions!"

      "Ah! mademoiselle, if you were employed in an omnibus office, you'd hear many things like that!"

      "Really! do you mean to say that there are others like him in Paris?"

      "There are everywhere, mademoiselle."

      Meanwhile, the individual who wished to go to Place Cadet had left the office; then he halted on the square, looking about him with a confused air. He spied the stout woman sitting on a bench, between Messieurs Narcisse and Aristoloche, one of whom was trying all the time to push away the feathers that adorned the front of his hat, while the other confined his energies to persistently stuffing one of his fingers into his nose. Our friend went up to the dame and said, touching his hat:

      "A ticket for Place Cadet, madame, if you please."

      "Do you take me for an omnibus clerk, monsieur?" replied the dame, sourly; "can't you go to the office?"

      "Pardon me, madame; I just went there, and they told me to apply on the left, in a corner."

      "Well, monsieur, am I a corner, I should like to know?"

      "Dame! I don't know; they told me to go to the left; I don't see the office; I don't see the 'bus."

      And the youth returned to the office he had just left, crying:

      "Where is that place where you get tickets for Place Cadet? I can't find it; can't you come and show me the way?"

      "Well, this caps the climax! If we had to act as guides for everybody who goes astray, then there would have to be a corps of messengers attached to the office.—Over yonder, I told you, monsieur; on the other side of Boulevard Saint-Denis."

      "What! have I got to go all the way to Saint-Denis to get to Place Cadet?"

      "La Villette! all aboard for La Villette!"

      All those who were bound for that destination hurried from the office, and in the confusion jostled the youth who wished to go to Place Cadet, and who persisted in remaining in the office where he had no business, looking at everybody as if he were disposed to weep.

      "Why do you stay here, monsieur," inquired Mademoiselle Laurette, "when they told you to go to the office on Boulevard Saint-Denis?"

      "I don't know Boulevard Saint-Denis, mademoiselle; and I am afraid of losing my way."

      "The trouble is that you ought not to have been let go out alone; some parents are very imprudent! I'll tell you what you ought to do: go to one of the messengers over by Porte Saint-Martin; take his arm and give him ten sous, and he'll take you to Place Cadet; he'll carry you even, if you're tired."

      "Ten sous! oh! that's too much. You're not going to Place Cadet, are you, mademoiselle?"

      "Oh! no, monsieur; we're going to the country."

      "Ah! do the omnibuses take people to the country too?"

      "They take you everywhere, monsieur."

      "Really! I have such a longing to see the sea; do the omnibuses give transfer checks for the seashore?"

      "You have only to ask, and you'll find out."

      The tall clown was on the point of returning to the clerks, but he was pushed aside by the man who had gone to get a glass of beer, and who returned to the office with a joyous air, saying:

      "Ah! this time I think I haven't been long; is my La Villette 'bus coming?"

      "La Villette!—it's just started, monsieur."

      "Oh! that is too much. Why couldn't you make it wait?"

      "They never wait, monsieur."

      "When will there be another one now?"

      "In about ten minutes."

      "Oh! then I have time enough to get a cup of coffee—and a glass of liqueur СКАЧАТЬ