Elly in Bloom. Colleen Oakes

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СКАЧАТЬ stirred her drink, totally unaware of the oddness of this interaction. She suddenly smiled.

      “Where are you from? You look like you’ve come a long way,” as if Elly needed reminding how she looked … and felt. Here she was, dirty, probably smelly, and wearing gray track pants and a black camisole that had a pumpkin on it. Her mascara had run away from her eyes a long time ago and her hair was full of grease. Elly’s exodus in the car had hit her like a brick in the face.

      “Um … ,” she paused and willed herself not to let hot tears run down her face. This was the moment she knew would come. Would she lie about her past? Would she start fresh? Pretend it never happened? She opened her mouth to lie, but the truth rushed out in its place.

      “I’ve been driving for days. Honestly, I don’t really even know what day it is. My husband … he….” The tears had started flowing. Crap. “He is … ,” she waved her hand around, agitated, unable to say it. “I’m not ready to talk about it. I don’t even know what I’m doing here. I just left Georgia. My house, my job, my friends … and now I’m here. I don’t know if I’m driving to California or Washington or maybe over a cliff, I don’t know.” She let out a strangled sob. “I can’t even think about what I left. I thought that if I went away that I could pretend it didn’t happen, but now I’m just thinking that this was the dumbest decision ever and that I will never be able to repair what he broke. Which it turns out, was me.” Elly put her palms over her eyes and shook her head.

      “I’m sorry. I must seem like an insane person.”

      Elly heard a smile in Kim’s voice as she replied, “A little, but please, keep going.”

      Afraid to look up, Elly kept her face down.

      “I’m—no, was—a secretary for a large shipping company. I was good at my job—executive secretary to the president. I’m pretty sure he couldn’t live without me. It was good pay, vacations even. I was saving up to buy a nice house in this suburb that was just … perfect. I thought I had everything I ever wanted. Then I met Aaron.” It was the first time in days that she had said his name. It caught in her throat like a lemon drop. “I met Aaron and he was totally different.”

      He was like a light that I didn’t know was out in me, she thought to herself. Kim nodded, knowingly.

      “I fell in love so fast, so hard. I couldn’t even breathe. And I thought, if I don’t marry this man, I’ll die, and so I did. He made me love art, and food, but more than that, I loved him. It was like a great love story you see in the movies. He made me things. He encouraged me to buy my house and we were so … happy. I was always overjoyed at my life and found it incredible. My friends, I think, saw something else. He was very caught up in his art and his successes and trials made him very … emotional. I feel so stupid now, but—”

      Kim’s face softened. She offered, “You thought it was sexy.”

      Elly felt her heart wilt. “Yes! But more than that, I loved being a part of him expressing his creativity. I was part of his passion. My job was so boring, and I was grateful that he was an escape from all that. We got married. He loved my mother, but didn’t handle it well when she passed away.” She felt her anger pouring over the table, out onto the street. “He had no roots in anything but his art. I knew he loved me. Then why did he, I mean how could he?” Elly stopped. “I’m sorry. I’m done for today. This is the first time I’ve talked about this to anyone. I feel terrible—you are a very nice person. I’m sorry to unload all this baggage on you. You can go if you want. I’d understand.”

      Kim narrowed her eyes. “Are you kidding me? This is the most exciting thing I’ve heard in a long time. You picked up and just drove away from your life. You’ve done what a lot of us have thought about doing, many times.” She put her hand over Elly’s. “Not that it’s a good thing. It’s just … a brave thing. The people around here,” she said, waving her arm around, “are pretty boring. They are stuck in their upper-class lives, get their coffee every morning, talk about politics—about which they all agree anyway, spend too much money on their children’s schools, and get plastic surgery. You’re the most honest thing to come my way in a while.” Elly surrendered a small smile.

      The morning passed quickly. Elly shared more about herself than she ever had with any of her friends in Georgia. Kim told her stories that made her blush and laugh about the neighbors, the inhabitants of this strange little chic suburb, this Clayton. Elly had three hot chocolates and Kim had two more lattes and pumpkin bread. By the time noon rolled around, Elly’s ambition to drive into oblivion had disappeared. Her exhaustion soaked into her bone marrow.

      “So what’s next for you?” Kim asked.

      “I don’t know…. I was headed west. I thought it would be pretty.” Elly winced at how stupid she sounded and stretched her arms above her head. “I’ll probably just find a hotel, stay the night, and leave in the morning.”

      Kim pestered her with rapid questions, “So there is no one there that you are going to meet? What is your plan? Do you know anyone out there?”

      “Nope. I just thought I would drive until I found somewhere I liked.”

      “So, what about here?” Kim asked.

      “Where is here?” Elly asked. Kim gave a grin. “You are in Clayton, Missouri. Land of heat and flowers.”

      “Here?” Elly glanced around at the well-dressed crowd sipping their overpriced drinks behind the shiny marble countertop. “Yeah … I don’t think I really fit in here,” she lamented, unable to picture her squat body waddling down the posh main street.

      “Yeah. I don’t either.” Kim turned her head thoughtfully.

      That’s true, Elly thought. Kim didn’t really fit in. She was dressed like a hippie—wearing a light-blue dress that seemed to have the stitches on the outside, an expensive-looking turquoise necklace, and black-and-white espadrilles. It was quite urban for this posh suburb. Still, Elly knew that beautiful people like Kim seemed to fit in everywhere; it came as naturally as smiling. Even now, she could feel men’s eyes on their table. A handsome yet chubby man wearing an apron had been staring at their table since they sat down, unsuccessfully hiding behind his newspaper.

      “What would I do here? Honestly, I probably need to go home … beg for my job back.” The thought of facing her boss, who would offer unsolicited advice and give her a gift card for Macy’s, sent a pang of nausea through her stomach. Kim frowned at her and looked directly into her eyes.

      “Why would you do that? You left for a reason. You haven’t driven two days straight just to turn around. Whatever you left behind, it hasn’t changed just because you’re gone. If you go crawling back, you’ll end up where you were before.” She paused. “I would know. I’ve left many men and gone back again, only to find myself in the exact same moment, leaving again. The wasted time that I will never get back is depressing to think about, especially now that I’m married to someone wonderful.” Kim was now on a roll and getting louder by the minute. Her hands flailed around wildly. Elly wanted to shrink in her chair.

      “Elly, your heart is broken. I can see it on your face and hear it in your voice, and I know that I don’t know you, but I feel like you’re meant to be here … here, in this ridiculous coffee shop.” She giggled and then grew suddenly serious. “I woke up today and felt that something important was going to happen. I saw you snapping at the barista and I felt like I knew that you were going to be a part of my life. It’s the oddest feeling. I’m not a person who usually believes СКАЧАТЬ