Midwives On-Call At Christmas. Tina Beckett
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Название: Midwives On-Call At Christmas
Автор: Tina Beckett
Издательство: HarperCollins
Жанр: Контркультура
Серия: Mills & Boon Series Collections
isbn: 9781474045988
isbn:
His mouth was slightly agape. He looked shocked. He looked a bit hurt. And everything about this was confusing her.
This was definitely the right thing to do. This was absolutely the right thing to do.
‘I’ll miss you, Jacob.’ Freya’s little voice cut through the silence. ‘Thank you for letting us stay.’
Jacob knelt down opposite her. ‘I’ll miss you too, Freya.’ His voice sounded hoarse. ‘You...and your mother.’ He didn’t look up. He didn’t look at Bonnie at all.
This was it. This was his chance to say something. To tell Bonnie that his feelings were every bit as strong as hers.
That he wanted to kiss her again—just as he had the other night.
That he wanted to spend more time with her and Freya. That he wanted to give this relationship a chance. That this actually was a relationship.
That she wasn’t completely crazy, and he was as crazy about her as she was about him.
She held her breath. Waiting. Waiting. For something. For anything.
But nothing came. Jacob still couldn’t look her in the eye.
‘Freya, go and get your coat and shoes. We need to go to the shops.’ Freya disappeared without a word.
He lifted his head. ‘Why are you leaving? Why are you leaving now?’
It was the way he said the word. She stepped forwards, everything erupting to the surface. ‘We can’t be here any more. Freya’s getting too used to being around you.’ She lifted her eyes. ‘And so am I.’
She gave her head a shake. ‘This was a bad idea. You helped us out, thank you. But I have no idea what’s happening between us, Jacob.’ She held out her hands. ‘I have no idea what this is.’ She took a deep breath. ‘I’ve found somewhere for us to go. We’ll be out of your hair.’
‘You have? Where? Is it one of those ones that you showed me?’ He sounded automatically defensive—as if he were going to tell them not to go.
She shook her head. ‘No, it’s another. It’s small, but in the area of Freya’s school. It will suit us for the next few months until we can find something else.’ She licked her lips. This was horrible. This was awkward.
There was a huge hand currently inside her chest, squeezing her heart hard.
Jacob looked at her again. There was a flash of something behind his eyes, which disappeared almost instantly. He looked down again.
‘What’s going on, Jacob? I know something’s been bothering you the last few days. But you haven’t said anything. You’ve been avoiding me. I thought we could talk about things.’ Her voice was edged with hopefulness that he might actually respond.
He shook his head. ‘There’s nothing.’ His voice was flat.
His dismissal made her mad. ‘Don’t say that. Don’t say it’s nothing. I know it is. Tell me. Tell me what’s going on.’ She was shouting now and she could almost see all his barriers being built up all around him. She bit her lip in anger and tried one last time. ‘I thought we could share things. I told you about my past—and you told me about yours. At least I thought you had.’
She glanced towards the door, worried that Freya would reappear.
He sucked in a deep breath. It made him seem taller, his chest wider and more imposing. ‘Not everything can be shared. Not everything is your business.’ His words were clipped.
‘Then we have to go,’ she said quietly. ‘I can’t be around you, Jacob. I can’t watch my little girl forming a closer attachment to you day by day when I feel as if you can’t be honest with me.’ She picked up her green coat. ‘I’ve been down this road before.’ Her eyes swept down to the floor and she gave a little shake of her head. ‘I thought that this time I could trust my judgement.’ She lifted her head and met his gaze. ‘I guess I was wrong.’
There was silence for a few seconds.
‘I hope you’ll be happy,’ he said quietly.
Something inside her died. That was it. Nothing else.
She’d been wrong. She’d been wrong about her and Jacob. There was nothing between them. A wave of humiliation washed over her.
She’d never felt like such a fool—not even when she’d found Robert in bed with her friend. Everything about this was different. With Robert, there had been no emotional investment left. With Jacob?
This hurt. This hurt so much it felt as if it could kill her.
Freya appeared at the door and she took her hand. ‘Goodbye, Jacob.’ Her voice was trembling. She just hoped he didn’t notice.
She held herself straight and lifted her head before she opened the door and walked outside.
It was definitely time to go.
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