A Bull Rider's Pride. Amanda Renee

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      SHEILA SLAMMED HER front door. She’d lost a patient on the operating table. It happened often in trauma surgeries. She should be used to it by now. But how did someone get used to having a person with a family and a future breathing beneath their fingertips one minute and then gone the next along with all their hopes, all their dreams?

      Sheila ran into the bathroom and splashed cold water on her face. It never got easier—you just grew more desensitized to it. Today had been particularly difficult—a ten-year-old girl with her whole future ahead of her. Dead thanks to her sister who had been texting and driving. The sister had survived, but would live with the consequences for the rest of her life.

      This was why Sheila was so infuriated with Brady Sawyer. Most of her patients learned something from their experience. The overweight person with two knee replacements learned they had to move and exercise more. The kid with a fractured tibia learned not to attempt a flip-over-willy-grind skateboard trick down the school handrail. What did Brady Sawyer learn? Nothing.

      And yes, there was a chance he’d fully recover. A very slim one, but with the proper therapy, the chance was real. Sheila had been a longtime proponent of hippotherapy and its benefits. Growing up in Colorado, she’d lived near a facility much like Dance of Hope. Few people had known much about hippotherapy and its benefits back then. When she turned fourteen, her parents had allowed her to volunteer there. There was an orthopedic surgeon who visited the facility every week and for four years she’d watched him restore quality of life back to people who’d felt as if their world had ended. He’d inspired her to go into medicine, particularly orthopedic trauma. Now she helped save lives like Brady’s and he was all too willing to throw it away.

      His attitude shouldn’t bother her, but it did. And it would continue to bother her until he was no longer her patient, and then every time she saw a bull riding event on television she’d still wonder. Sheila laughed to herself. He wasn’t her first bull rider and probably wouldn’t be her last. She lived in the heart of Hill Country where rodeos were as common as apple pie. The suburban town she’d grown up in had been a stark contrast. She’d known many equestrians, but not bull riders.

      Thinking of home reminded her it had been over a week since she’d last phoned her parents. Every night there was a message from them on her voice mail. Today she’d actually gotten off early enough to return the call.

      “Hello, honey,” her mom answered on the first ring. “How’s our favorite surgeon?”

      “It was a rough day. I lost a patient.” No matter how difficult her residency was, she knew she could always turn to her mother for comfort.

      “Oh honey, do you want to talk about it?” Sheila heard a muffled sound and assumed her mother had covered the receiver.

      “Mom, tell Daddy later, and no, I don’t want to talk about it. I’d rather hear about your day.”

      “Your sister had an ultrasound today—a three-dimensional one. You won’t believe how much Sophia resembles you as a baby—that’s the name they’ve chosen—did I tell you that already? Anyway, she posted the photos online. Look at them later if you get the chance. We’ll be so glad when your residency is over next summer and you move home. You’re missing your nieces and nephews growing up.”

      Sheila released her ponytail and flopped onto the couch. “About that. I’ve decided to pursue the two-year orthopedic trauma fellowship at Grace General.”

      “I thought you were looking into fellowships here.” Disappointment was evident in her mother’s tone.

      “I know that was the plan, Mom, but this fellowship wasn’t available until recently. I like Grace General and my work here. I’m looking to make this permanent. My landlord gave me the option to apply my rent toward a down payment on this house. It’s not much but it’s more than I can afford in Colorado. Once I weed through these student loans, then maybe, but I’ve given this a lot of thought and this is what’s best for me.”

      “What about settling down and starting a family? You’re not getting any younger.”

      Any comfort she’d hoped for had just flown out the window. “My social life consists of my colleagues. It’s not as if I have much time or energy to go out and meet people. Besides children require much more than I’m able to give. Maybe in a few years I’ll feel differently. I don’t need a husband and kids to make me happy. I’m content with my life right now.”

      At least that was the lie she told herself every night before she went to bed. Sometimes she’d roll over in the middle of the night and reach out for someone who wasn’t there. Her life severely lacked intimacy. The last hug she’d received had been from a patient after Sheila had given her good news. The last time someone other than a family member had said I love you had been her college boyfriend. And sex? She didn’t want to think about how long that had been. Okay, so it bothered her, but she’d known this career path came with sacrifices. She’d accepted it. She just didn’t exactly care for it.

      “I want you to be happy, Sheila.” Her mom’s voice softened. “You need to call more often. We miss you.”

      “I miss you more.”

      After hearing about her father’s new car, her mother’s bridge-game gossip and more about her sister’s third pregnancy, she poured herself a glass of wine and eased into a bubble bath. She closed her eyes and Brady Sawyer immediately came to mind.

      “Dammit!” She sat up so quickly she knocked her wine into the tub. “That’s lovely.” She’d touched him twice and she couldn’t erase the feeling of his hands in hers. She turned her glass upright and set it on the floor. Grabbing a pumice stone, she ran it over her palms. Why was he haunting her? That was exactly how she felt. Haunted. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw him. And it wasn’t just today. He’d been a daily thought for two and a half months. She constantly told herself she wasn’t attracted to him. She couldn’t be. It simply wasn’t allowed and she chalked it up to curiosity about the man. But if Marissa had detected it so easily, she wondered who else had.

      Brady Sawyer had left the building. With his drive and determination, he’d progress quickly at Dance of Hope and be out of her life for good. Which was for the best. So why did the thought of never seeing him again bother her?

      * * *

      “DON’T WORRY ABOUT the child-support payments. Focus on getting better.” Alice sat on the bed across from Brady in his Dance of Hope cottage while Gunner played with his See & Spell at the table. “You’re an amazing father and I know you want to do everything possible to make sure Gunner is provided for, and I promise you, if things get really bad I’ll let you know. We’re okay. It’s tight, but we’re managing. Your father checks in on us all the time.”

      “You shouldn’t have to manage and my father shouldn’t be the one providing for you.” Brady gripped the arms of his wheelchair. He and Alice had never been a couple. They’d been best friends since childhood who happened to have spent one lonely night together that resulted in the most precious gift he could have ever received. Unfortunately, they hadn’t any romantic feelings toward each other. So far, they’d successfully raised Gunner together, yet separately. “Why do you do this to me?”

      “Why do I do what? Bring your son to see you? Because he loves you and he asks about you every day.”

      Brady wheeled closer to the bed so Gunner wouldn’t hear him. “And a part of you secretly wishes that by seeing me in this condition he won’t want anything to do with the rodeo.”

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