By Request Collection April-June 2016. Оливия Гейтс

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СКАЧАТЬ been preparing herself for all day and dreading, Melanie began to relax a little. There was something about Forde’s friend’s mother that inspired trust.

      Miriam smiled at her from the other armchair. ‘Before we go any further I must make one thing perfectly clear. Anything we talk about, anything you tell me is strictly between the two of us. Forde is a dear man but he will not be party to anything which is said in this room, not unless you wish to confide in him, of course. You have my absolute word on that.’

      ‘Thank you.’ Melanie nodded and relaxed a little more. She didn’t want to have any secrets from Forde, it wasn’t that, but knowing she still retained some control was nonetheless reassuring. It made her feel safe.

      ‘Forde tells me you’re expecting another baby?’ Miriam said quietly.

      Melanie nodded again. She was glad Miriam had said ‘another’ and not pretended Matthew hadn’t been born. ‘Yes, in the spring.’ She hesitated. ‘I suppose that’s the main reason— No.’ She paused, shaking her head. ‘That’s not right. It’s one of the reasons I’m here. I guess falling for another baby has brought everything to a head.’

      ‘Everything?’ Miriam said even more quietly.

      Melanie looked into the gentle face opposite her. There were family photographs covering one wall of the room and she had noticed one little girl was in a wheelchair. This woman knew about trouble and heartache, she thought, biting her lower lip. She would have known that even without the photographs. It was in Miriam’s eyes. ‘Shall—shall I start at the beginning?’ she asked. ‘My childhood, I mean.’

      ‘That would be good,’ Miriam said softly. ‘And take your time. You can come to see me here as often as you like, every evening if you wish, until you feel ready to stop. Forde has been a wonderful friend to my son and you take priority right now. All right?’

      Melanie left the house at seven o’clock feeling like a wet rag. She, who prided herself on not wearing her heart on her sleeve, had wept and wailed through the last two hours in a manner that horrified her now she thought about it.

      She climbed into the pickup, which she’d parked a few metres from Miriam’s front door. It looked somewhat incongruous in the line of mostly expensive cars the well-to-do street held, but Melanie didn’t notice.

      She took several deep breaths before she started the engine. She was far from convinced all this was a good idea, she told herself grimly. She felt worse, much worse if anything, after all the emotion of the last hours. Admittedly Miriam had seemed to guess how she was feeling and had assured her it was the same for everyone initially. She had to persevere to come out of the other end of the dark tunnel, according to Miriam. But what if she got stuck in the tunnel? What then?

      She drew out of the parking space into the road, a deep weariness making her limbs feel heavy.

      Then she straightened her back and lifted her chin. She had promised Forde and she would keep her end of the bargain. She would come back tomorrow and all the other tomorrows until this thing was done.

      Melanie drove home slowly, aware she was totally exhausted and needed to be ultra careful. Once at the cottage she fixed herself a quick meal before falling into bed. She was asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow.

      That evening was to set the pattern for the next few weeks, but the morning after her first visit to Miriam she attended the local hospital for her first scan. It was a bittersweet day. She remembered how she and Forde had come together for Matthew’s first scan, excited and thrilled as they had waited to see the baby on the monitor, and slightly apprehensive in case everything wasn’t as it should be.

      This time she sat alone in the waiting area, which was smaller than the one in the hospital in London—her own choice, she reminded herself as she watched the couple in front of her come out of the room where the scan took place wrapped in each other’s arms and smiling.

      Once she was lying on the bed it was more of a repeat of the time before. The lady taking the scan was smiling; all was well, heartbeat strong, baby developing as it should be and no concerns.

      She left the hospital clutching two pictures of the child in her womb and with tears of relief and thankfulness streaming down her face.

      Once she was sitting in the truck in the hospital car park she took a few minutes to compose herself before phoning Forde on his mobile. He answered immediately. ‘Nell? What’s wrong?’

      ‘Nothing’s wrong. I’ve been to the hospital for the first scan and everything’s fine with the baby. I just wanted you to know. I’ve a picture for you. I’ll leave it with Isabelle.’

      It was a moment before he spoke and his voice was gruff. ‘Thank God. And I mean that, thank God. They can’t tell if it’s a boy or a girl at this stage, can they?’

      ‘No. That’s at twenty weeks. Do you want to know?’ They hadn’t found out with Matthew.

      ‘I don’t know. Do you?’

      ‘I’m not sure. I’ll ring you near the time and discuss it then. I have to go to work now. Goodbye, Forde.’

      His voice was husky when he said, ‘Goodbye, Nell.’

      It took her another ten minutes to dry her eyes and compose herself again before she could start the truck and drive out of the hospital confines, but by the time she got to Isabelle’s house she was in command of herself.

      Isabelle insisted on giving her a hot drink before she joined James in the garden, and her mother-in-law was entranced with the picture of her future grandchild. ‘Do you mind if I take a copy of it for myself before I pass this on to Forde tonight?’ Isabelle asked as they finished their hot chocolate and custard creams at the kitchen table. ‘He’s calling in later for dinner. I don’t suppose you’d like to stay too?’

      Melanie shook her head. ‘I’m going to see Miriam again.’ She had thought it only right to tell her mother-in-law what she was doing yesterday and now she was glad she had. It was the perfect excuse and had the added bonus of being the truth.

      ‘Is it being nosy if I ask you how it went?’ Isabelle said gently.

      ‘Of course not.’ Melanie shrugged. ‘But I can’t give you much of an answer because I’m not sure myself. It was… traumatic, I suppose.’

      ‘But helpful?’

      Melanie shrugged again. ‘I don’t know, Isabelle. I guess time will tell.’ She drank the last of her hot chocolate and stood up. ‘I’d better go and help James with the planting.’

      Once outside, she lifted her face to the silver-grey sky. Helpful. How could anything so painful be helpful? She wasn’t looking forward to the next weeks.

      November turned into December amid biting white frosts and brilliantly cold days, but she and James managed to complete the work at Isabelle’s by the end of the first week of December.

      And Forde kept his word. He didn’t come to the cottage and he didn’t call her. In fact he could have fallen off the edge of the world and she’d be none the wiser, Melanie thought to herself irritably more than once, before taking herself to task for her inconsistency.

      Pride had forbidden her to mention him to Isabelle while she had still been working at her mother-in-law’s house. СКАЧАТЬ