An Amish Match. Jo Ann Brown

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СКАЧАТЬ in circles wasn’t getting him anywhere and putting off asking the question any longer was dumm. He caught her puzzled gaze and held it, trying not to lose himself in her soft blue eyes. “Rebekah Burkholder, will you marry me?”

      * * *

      Rebekah choked on her gasp. She’d been puzzled about the reason for Joshua Stoltzfus’s visit, but if she’d guessed every minute for the rest of her life, she couldn’t have imagined it would be for him to propose.

      Her son let out a protest, and she realized she’d tightened her hold around his waist until he couldn’t breathe. Loosening her arm, she set Sammy on the floor. She urged him to go and play with his wooden blocks stacked near the arch into the front room.

      “He doesn’t need to be a part of this conversation.” She watched the little boy toddle to the blocks. She needed time to get her features back under control before she answered Joshua’s astonishing question.

      “I agree,” Joshua said in a tense voice.

      She clasped her hands in her lap and looked at him. His brown hair glistened in the sunlight coming through the kitchen windows, but his eyes, which were even darker, had become bottomless, shadowed pools. He was even more handsome than he’d been when she’d first met him years ago, because his sharply sculpted nose now fit with his other strong features. His black suspenders drew her eyes to his powerful shoulders and arms, which had been honed by years of building buggies. His broad hands, which now gripped the edge of the table, had been compassionate when they’d touched hers yesterday.

      Had he planned to ask her to be his wife even then? Was that why he’d been solicitous of her and Sammy? She was confused because Joshua Stoltzfus didn’t seem to have a duplicitous bone in his body. But if he hadn’t been thinking about proposing yesterday, why had he today?

      The only way to know was to ask. She forced out the words she must. “Why would you propose to me?”

      “You need a husband, and I need a wife.” His voice was as emotionless as if they spoke about last week’s weather. “We’ve known each other for a very long time, and it’s common for Amish widows and widowers to remarry. But even more important, you’re Lloyd’s widow.”

      “Why is that more important?”

      “Lloyd and I once told each other that if something happened to one of us, we would take care of the other’s family.”

      “It isn’t our way to make vows.”

      “I know, but Lloyd was insistent that I agree to make sure his wife and family were cared for if something happened to him. I saw the gut sense and asked if he would do the same for me.” He folded his arms on the table. “He was my friend, and I can’t imagine anyone I would have trusted more with my family.”

      Rebekah quickly lowered her eyes from his sincere gaze. He truly believed Lloyd was the man she once had believed he was, too. She couldn’t tell him the truth. Not about Lloyd, but she could tell him the truth about how foolish he was to ask her to be his wife.

      “There’s a big difference between taking care of your friend’s family and...” She couldn’t even say the word marry.

      “But I haven’t even taken care of you as I promised him.”

      “We’ve managed, and we will until I can sell the farm. Danki for your concern, Joshua. I appreciate what you are doing, but it’s not necessary.”

      “I disagree. The fact remains I need a wife and you need a husband.”

      “You need a babysitter and I need a carpenter.”

      His lips twitched and she wanted to ask what he found amusing about this absurd conversation. Was it a jest he’d devised to make her smile? She pushed aside that thought as quickly as it’d formed. Joshua was a gut man. That was what everyone said, and she agreed. He wouldn’t play such a prank on her. He must be sincere.

      A dozen different emotions spiraled through her. She didn’t know what to feel. Flattered that he’d considered her as a prospect to be his wife? Fear she might be as foolish as she had been the last time a man had proposed? Not that she believed Joshua would raise his hand and strike her, but then she hadn’t guessed Lloyd would, either. And, to be honest, she never could have envisioned Joshua asking her to marry him.

      “Rebekah,” he said as his gaze captured hers again. “I know this is sudden, and I know you must think I’m ab in kopp—”

      “The thought you’re crazy has crossed my mind. More than once.”

      He chuckled, the sound soothing because it reminded her of the many other times she’d heard him laugh. He never laughed at another’s expense.

      “I’m sure it has, but I assure you that I haven’t lost my mind.” He paused, toyed with his cup, then asked, “Will you give me an answer, Rebekah? Will you marry me?”

      “But why? I don’t love you.” Her cheeks turned to fire as she hurried to add, “That sounded awful. I’m sorry. The truth is you’ve always been a gut friend, Joshua, which is why I feel I can be blunt.”

      “If we can’t speak honestly now, I can’t imagine when we could.”

      “Then I will honestly say I don’t understand why you’d ask me to m-m-marry you.” She hated how she stumbled over the simple word.

      No, it wasn’t simple. There was nothing simple about Joshua Stoltzfus appearing at her door to ask her to become his wife. As he’d assured her, he wasn’t ab in kopp. In fact, Joshua—up until today—had been the sanest man she’d ever met.

      “Because we could help each other. Isn’t that what a husband and wife are? Helpmeets?” He cleared his throat. “I would rather marry a woman I know and respect as a friend. We’ve both married once for love, and we’ve both lost the ones we love. Is it wrong to be more practical this time?”

      Every inch of her wanted to shout, “Ja!” But his words made sense.

      She had married Lloyd because she’d been infatuated with him and the idea of being his wife, so much so that she had convinced herself while they were courting to ignore how rough and demanding he had been with her when she’d caught the odor of beer on his breath. She’d accepted his excuses and his reassurances it wouldn’t happen again...even when it had. She’d been blinded by love. How much better would it be to marry with her eyes wide open? No surprises and a husband whom she counted among her friends.

      A pulse of excitement rushed up through her. She could escape, at last, from this farm, which had become a prison of pain and grief and second-guessing herself while she spun lies to protect the very person who had hurt her. She’d be a fool not to agree immediately.

      Once she would have asked for time to pray about her decision, but she’d stopped reaching out to God when He hadn’t delivered her from Lloyd’s abuse. She believed in Him, and she trusted God to take care of the great issues of the world. Those kept Him so busy He didn’t have time for small problems like hers.

      “All right,” she said. “I will marry you.”

      “Really?” He appeared shocked, as if he hadn’t thought she’d agree quickly.

      “Ja.” СКАЧАТЬ