California Girls. Susan Mallery

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СКАЧАТЬ heard her door open, followed by, “Finola, we have to talk.”

      Her eyes popped open. Nigel was standing in front of her. He grabbed her chair by the arms and stared at her intently.

      “Nigel, what are you doing here? I go live in less than thirty minutes. What’s going on?”

      Nigel, a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon, didn’t see patients on Fridays and they were leaving on their trip in the morning. What was so important that it couldn’t wait until after the show?

      He looked at her. “I’m sorry.”

      It wasn’t the words that got her attention so much as the tone, and maybe the stricken expression on his face. Her stomach clenched.

      “What happened?”

      Visions of her sisters or her mother lying prone on the road filled her mind. Or maybe there had been a fire. Or a—

      “I don’t know how to say it,” he began, only to stop.

      Bile rose in her throat. Her heartbeat jumped a thousandfold and there was a ringing in her ears. Someone was dead—she knew it.

      “I’m having an affair.”

      As he spoke, Nigel released the chair and paced the length of the room. He was still talking—she could see his lips moving—but for the life of her she couldn’t hear anything. The roaring, rushing sound was too great.

      The words repeated over and over in her head until their meaning sunk in. Years ago, she’d fallen off a tall porch onto the grass below. She’d landed on her side and all the air had been forced out of her lungs. This felt like that. She couldn’t inhale, couldn’t stop the surge of panic that swept through her as her body began to tremble. The lack of breath was followed by a sharp gut-wrenching pain in her heart.

      How could he? When? With who? Why? They were married. They loved each other. He was her best friend. She was going to get pregnant on their trip to Hawaii.

      No, there had to be a mistake. He couldn’t have. Only as she watched him watch her, she knew he wasn’t lying and that he really had, with four simple words, shattered her and their marriage.

      “You have to understand,” he said, his voice low. “I’m sorry to have to tell you now. I know the timing is less than optimal.”

      “Less than optimal?” she shrieked, then had to consciously lower her voice. “Less than optimal? I’m about to go on live television. It’s not enough to dump this on me, but you had to do it right this second, to screw with me even more?”

      “I’ve tried to tell you so many times over the past few weeks, but you’re too busy to listen. There’s always another show.”

      She felt a flicker of rage and reached for it with both hands. At least anger would provide temporary strength.

      “You’re blaming this on me?” she demanded. “You waltz in here and announce you’re having an affair and it’s my fault you waited until just this second to tell me?”

      “It’s not like that.”

      “Oh, really?” She brushed away tears. “What’s it like?”

      He turned away. “I thought you needed to know.”

      Before she could figure out if she was shaking too hard to stand, he walked out. Just like that. She was alone with the nausea, the aches, the broken life and a ticking clock that warned her she had eighteen minutes and twelve seconds until she was live.

      None of this is real, she told herself frantically. It couldn’t be. It wasn’t happening and Nigel hadn’t just told her about an affair. He couldn’t have. Not her Nigel. Not the wonderful, warm, loving husband who was always there for her. She knew him, not the cold stranger who had just left.

      If only her ears would stop ringing, she thought desperately. If only she could breathe or cry or scream or run. An affair. Another woman had been in his life, his heart and his bed. Their bed. No. No! He’d slept with someone else, had whispered to someone else, had touched someone else, had orgasmed with someone else.

      Her mind refused to believe even as her heart began to bleed. Betrayal and sadness and disbelief churned together until she choked. She had to get out of here. She had to go home and—

      Her gaze settled on the clock. No, she told herself. She couldn’t leave. She had a live show in fifteen minutes. She had to go on the air and act as if nothing was wrong, as if she were fine and the world hadn’t just fallen off its axis and into a black hole from which it would never escape.

      She sucked in air, being careful not to hyperventilate, then hurried to the mirror. After flipping on the harsh, unforgiving lights, she studied herself for a second before reaching for a tissue, then concealer. She looked wide-eyed and shell-shocked. As if she’d just seen something horrific. Or maybe just experienced it. Dear God, she couldn’t do this.

      “Finola?” Rochelle knocked once before entering. “They need you on set.”

      Finola nodded without speaking. She added a little more powder, then took one more breath before forcing a smile. “I’m ready.”

      Her assistant frowned. “What happened?”

      “Nothing. I’m fine.”

      “It’s something and it’s not fine.”

      Finola faked another smile and hurried past her. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

      She made her way along the corridor toward the studio. She wove her way around false walls, backdrops and cables. The show’s producer smiled at her.

      “Have you met Treasure yet? She’s gorgeous. I only saw her from a distance, but wow.”

      Finola didn’t bother to say she had yet to meet the star. She’d been too busy watching her marriage collapse around her. Not that Treasure had asked for an intro—her request had been that they meet in front of the live audience so the experience “was more spontaneous.” As far as superstar demands went, it was easy and doable, and it beat one singer’s request for “six snow-white kittens to play with before I sing.”

      Gary, the sound guy, handed her a small microphone. She clipped it on her jacket’s lapel while he snaked the thin cord over her shoulder. He clipped the battery pack to the waistband of her skirt.

      Usually she joked about him touching her. Their friendly banter was a regular part of her “get ready” ritual. But today she couldn’t think of a single thing to say. And in eight minutes, that was going to be a big problem.

      Breathe, she told herself. She would breathe and trust herself to know what she was doing. She’d done this show for nearly four years. She was good at it. She loved her work and she would be fine. If only she didn’t hear the echo of the screams she didn’t dare give in to.

      Gary smoothed her jacket into place, winked at her and smiled. “You’re good to go, Finola.”

      “Thank you.” She cleared her throat. “Testing, testing.”

      The СКАЧАТЬ