As Far as the Stars. Virginia Macgregor

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СКАЧАТЬ the rear-view mirror, I see my two dresses and Blake’s suit and hat box, laid out on the back.

      And then I look at the rest of the car, like it’s the first time I see it. The scuffed leather bench seats in the front and back. The beige top, folded down. It’s awesome. Old and kind of rusty and it rattles whenever you go over sixty mph. But it’s totally awesome. Like Blake.

      A hard lump forms at the back of my throat.

      I close the car door, put my left hand on the steering wheel and I’m about to switch on the ignition when I notice something else: the photograph taped to the dashboard. I’m ten years old, standing on this tall rock above a swimming hole. Blake’s holding my hand. We’re about to jump.

      Jude must have taken the picture. It was the first time Blake took us there – Blue Springs in the Cherokee National Forest, Tennessee.

      I switch on the ignition.

      And then I realise that he’s still standing there.

      ‘Do you have someone?’ I ask.

      He looks at me, his grey eyes wide. ‘Someone?’

      ‘Someone you can call – or go to?’

      He looks back at the arrivals lounge and then back at me like he’s struggling to make up his mind about something.

      ‘Where were you meant to go?’ I prompt. ‘After you picked up your dad—’ Then I stall.

      I grip the steering wheel harder. ‘Well, where were you and your dad meant to stay? When he got here, I mean?’

      Please may he have someone. A friend. A relative. A contact from his dad. He can’t stay here alone.

      ‘Oregon,’ he says. ‘A connecting flight. To see the eclipse.’

      ‘Wow, Oregon,’ I say. ‘That’s cool.’ Because Oregon’s where I would have chosen to be – if it weren’t for the wedding. I mean, Nashville’s a cool place to see the totality, but Oregon is where it all starts.

      I wonder whether, in a different lifetime, without the wedding and without the plane going missing, Christopher and I might have met out there, at the beginning of the eclipse. And then I think about how we might have crossed walking around the Sculpture Garden in DC. Blake wrote this song, ages ago, about how when you’re meant to be meet someone, you get loads of chances – you brush past them over and over until BAM! you finally notice each other. I’d always thought that was a bit slushy and romantic – and too superstitious for my scientific world view. But maybe there’s something in it.

      ‘So, you have someone you know in Oregon?’ I ask. And then I feel stupid. They’re going on a holiday, why would they know anyone there? And even if they did know someone there, it’s miles away – it’s not like a friend in Oregon is going to help Christopher with what he’s going through here in DC.

      ‘No, we were going to stay in a hotel.’ His eyes go far away, like he’s trying to picture being there. ‘And Dad booked us a place on a sailing boat,’ Christopher says. ‘He wanted to see the eclipse from the water.’

      A silence hangs between us: the silence of what was meant to happen if his life hadn’t just been turned upside down.

      ‘What about your mom?’ I ask.

      He stares at me and blinks.

      ‘Was she meant to come with you – to see the eclipse?’ I ask.

      And I know it’s overstepping. And that he would have mentioned his mom already if she were in his life. But I can’t drive away thinking that he’s going to be here on his own. There has to be someone he can call.

      He shakes his head.

      ‘Is she back in England?’

      He shakes his head again. ‘Atlanta.’

      ‘Your mom lives in Atlanta?’

      He nods.

      ‘I’ve got a parent from each side of the pond – like you. Only the other way around. Mum’s American, Dad’s English.’

      That was in Blake’s song too: how when you meet someone you were meant to meet you find out all this crazy stuff you have in common that can’t be explained away.

      ‘They’re not together,’ he says.

      ‘They’re divorced?’

      ‘They never got married.’

      ‘Oh.’

      ‘They separated shortly after Mum had me.’

      ‘Do you go to Atlanta to visit her?’ I ask.

      He shakes his head.

      I know I’m in a minority: the kid of parents who are still together – more than that, who love each other. And that even though Mom’s totally crazy in the way she organises every second of our lives; and even though Dad’s too much of a wuss to ever stand up to her and say No, life’s already hard enough without another one of your mad projects; and even though Jude annoys the hell out of me with her throwing away her life to be a 1950s housewife, and Blake drives me crazy in the way he thinks the whole world revolves around him – I love them more than anything. All four of them. And I know that that makes me one of the lucky ones. I’ve got a family. A proper family. The most incredible family in the world.

      ‘Have you called her?’ I ask. ‘Your mom? To tell her what’s going on.’ My breath is tight in my throat. ‘With the plane.’

      He shakes his head. ‘I didn’t know what to say.’ He pauses. ‘It’s like too much time has passed – too much has happened. We can’t just pick up where we left off.’

      I look at him and think about how he helped me get the car back, and the thought of him going back into that airport terminal on his own makes my heart sink.

      ‘Perhaps it would help if you saw her face to face.’

      His head snaps up.

      ‘I could take you part of the way to Atlanta,’ I suggest. ‘I’m heading in that direction. Sort of.’

      Leda jumps up and starts thumping her tail on the tarmac, like she’s totally up for taking Christopher with us.

      He bites the side of his lip and looks back at the door to the arrivals lounge.

      ‘As soon as there’s any news, it will be all over the TV and the internet,’ I say. ‘It’s not like you’ll find out more by staying here. And you’ll go crazy waiting. Come with me – you can charge your phone in my car and I’ll drive you to Knoxville. There’ll be a bus to Atlanta from there.’

      He doesn’t say anything.

      ‘I could do with the company,’ I say.

      Leda starts licking Christopher’s arm.

      ‘And СКАЧАТЬ