The Doctor Returns. Stella MacLean

Чтение книги онлайн.

СКАЧАТЬ meant to be encouraging, faltered against the stiff set of her lips. “We meant so much to each other, yet everything’s changed between us... I want you to know how sorry I am.”

      “About what?”

      He could only imagine her devastation at the loss of their child. “The...baby.”

      “It’s a little late for that, don’t you think?” Her tone was hard, uncompromising.

      “Yes, it probably is,” he replied, aware of the emotional distance between them. “And Sam. I’m sorry. I liked him. He... His father gave me my first job in his hardware store,” he said, fumbling his words.

      “Sam was a good person, a good husband.”

      “You didn’t take his name?”

      Her sadness evident, she murmured, “No. He wanted me to. I should have. His parents weren’t comfortable with my decision, but they didn’t say anything.”

      A mix of emotions, some he couldn’t identify, cascaded through him. The sudden urge to touch her nearly overwhelmed him. “Look, this isn’t easy for either of us, but we’ll be working together,” he continued, determined to say what needed to be said.

      “You mean you don’t want anything to interfere with our professional relationship.” She stood just inside the door of the tiny room, her arms crossed. “I agree completely.”

      Her words sounded so cold, so impersonal, making him suddenly aware that he hadn’t said what he’d meant at all. “That’s part of it.” He sought her eyes, needing her encouragement to continue. “I want us to meet somewhere, not here, but somewhere we can catch up, reestablish contact.”

      “Why?” she demanded, her eyes harboring suspicion. “What would you and I have to discuss at this point in our lives?”

      “I...I didn’t recognize you yesterday. I didn’t mean to imply that I don’t remember you. I do.” Feeling suddenly very awkward, he jammed his hands into the pockets of his lab coat. “You surprised me,” he blurted out.

      “How?”

      “I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

      “You thought I’d never come back here because of what happened,” she said, her gaze aimed directly at him.

      “Maybe...” Why did he feel so tongue-tied around her? He never used to be.

      “It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?” she asked, her voice clear and untroubled.

      “That’s my point. I want us to—”

      “Neill, please don’t say any more. You and I have a clinic to do. Let’s leave it at that.”

      Her voice conveyed strength, but her eyes swam with emotion. Seeing her anguish, he leaned toward her. With their bodies nearly touching in the narrow room, their heat mingling, need flared in him. He wanted to take her in his arms, awaken those old feelings. “Do you remember that night at Reef Point Lighthouse—”

      * * *

      “DON’T!”

      His body was so close, so touchable. Sherri closed her eyes to block out the image of him, of that night—his body pressed to hers, the excitement and their happiness.

      “Seeing you again has brought it all back for me,” he murmured.

      Did he remember that night the way she did? Their lovemaking, the raw need driven by the knowledge that very soon they’d go their separate ways to different places, all the while vowing to love each other forever.

      What that night had cost her would live forever in her memory—the night she’d conceived. In the excitement of their graduation party, they hadn’t used protection. When her pregnancy test had come back positive, she’d been so eager to share her news with Neill, believing he would be excited at the prospect of a child. It would be difficult to raise a baby while Neill did his medical degree and she’d have to drop out of nursing school when the baby was born, but she had faith in them, in their love. They could do it...together.

      She’d called, prepared to tell him. He’d been so full of stories about his career, his hopes and dreams, none of which fit with the arrival of a baby. When she’d finally cranked up her courage to tell him, he’d acted like she was kidding him. He’d wanted to know what she wanted him to do about a baby, as if their baby was some sort of undesirable nuisance. She’d been so upset, she’d hung up the phone, convinced that she would never be able to get him to understand that she loved him and their baby.

      Maybe she should’ve tried harder for her baby’s sake. Should have called him back, given him another chance. But he’d become so involved in university life in Boston that she’d felt she no longer fit in his world. She didn’t want his pity, didn’t want him to feel obligated to do the right thing. Or worse, pretend he cared.

      As she met his gaze, confusion and doubt stilled her heart. “It was graduation night, and we were dancing under the moon.”

      “And you never looked more beautiful.”

      Don’t let yourself remember. Don’t. It’s not worth it. He’s not worth it.

      She took a deep breath, willing herself to speak calmly. “We have to get back to work.”

      His fidgeted with his tie, ran his hands through his hair. Mesmerized, her eyes followed his hands as she recalled the excitement of his touch.

      “Sherri, I’d like to see you sometime. Socially, I mean. Dinner perhaps?”

      How could he possibly think he could make up for the past and what they’d lost by inviting her out to dinner?

      Yet his voice, his openness as he looked at her and his uneasy smile—they were all so familiar. She waited to see if he’d rub the back of his neck after running his hands through his hair.

      When he did, a rush of feeling—long held hostage by her fear—flooded to the surface. It was as if he’d never been gone. She stepped back in shock and disbelief.

      How could he still have this effect on her?

      She had to stop herself from reaching for him, for everything his love had once offered her. “Dinner? That’s hardly necessary,” she said over the blood pounding in her ears. She leaned against the wall for support, hoping he didn’t notice her apprehension.

      When would she ever be free of these feelings? It had been twelve long years since she’d seen him...since he’d seen her. And still he held the power to make her want him.

      “A date for coffee then. We can go anywhere you’d like. We could escape to Portland,” he said, his voice flowing around her.

      Searching for an easy exit, she glanced around. Several patients stood outside the room, their curiosity directed at the two of them. All she needed was for people to start talking about her and Neill—talk that could lead to questions whose answers could hurt her and her family. “Dr. Brandon, this isn’t the time or place,” she cautioned.

      “I’m only asking for a chance to talk things out,” СКАЧАТЬ