Beach Baby. Joan Kilby

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СКАЧАТЬ painful episode behind her. Now her child was nearby and Nina’s heart quickened as if her daughter were in the next room. “H-how do you know?”

      “Her mother, Elaine Hocking, called me,” Dora said. “Apparently the girl has run away and is looking for her biological parents.”

      Elaine and Jim Hocking, the wealthy older couple Dora had cleaned house for who couldn’t have a child of their own. Nina sat down with a thump. She used to fantasize that this day would come but had never dared to truly hope.

      “I know this is a shock,” Dora said. “This wasn’t supposed to happen. The Hockings never wanted their daughter to know she was adopted.”

      “I never understood that,” Nina said. “Why not?”

      “Apparently Elaine Hocking was herself adopted into a family who had tried for years unsuccessfully to have a child,” Dora explained. “No sooner had they got Elaine than the woman became pregnant. Elaine says she was treated diffrerently from the biological child and never felt as loved or as special. She didn’t want her adopted daughter to feel in the slightest way second rate so they let her believe she was theirs in every way possible.”

      “I should never have given my baby up,” Nina said. “I should have tried to keep her somehow.” But at the time she’d felt she’d had no choice.

      The summer after she’d finished high school, she’d worked at a golf course in the same beach community where her daughter was now. That’s where she’d met Reid Robertson, the father of her child and the love of her life. When the summer was over, he’d left his lifeguard job and gone back to Yale with a pledge of love and a promise to return. But when Nina had found herself pregnant, Reid’s mother had stepped into the picture.

      Serena, smoothly coiffed and impeccably groomed, had craftily treated Nina as an equal collaborator in her determination to do what was best for Reid. Nina had been swayed by her arguments, too young and inexperienced, too in awe of the Robertsons’ wealth and social standing, to realize how controlling Serena was.

      Maybe if Reid had been closer to home and he and Nina could have talked face-to-face, things might have turned out differently. He called her every week but that wasn’t enough to counteract Serena’s intimidating personality. Over a formal luncheon for two at the Robertsons’ mansion in Shaughnessy, Serena calmly, rationally, kindly, explained how Nina was ruining her son’s life.

      “He says he’s going to quit university and find a job to support you and the baby,” Serena said. “Naturally, I only want what’s best for you both but such a course of action would be a terrible waste of his potential, don’t you agree?”

      “Yes, of course.” Nina watched Serena to see which fork and knife she used on the radicchio salad served by a uniformed maid. “He loves Yale. I don’t want him to give it up.”

      “Just imagine the scenario that would follow,” Serena went on. “He’d end up in some dreadful job for minimum wage, in a fast-food joint or washing cars. Probably he’d have to work two jobs just to make ends meet without a spare moment to write his stories. Within a year or two he’d resent you and the baby. Oh, he wouldn’t say anything, not Reid, but you would know how he felt deep inside. You would feel responsible.” Serena drank from a crystal water goblet then delicately blotted her mouth with a linen napkin. “I’d hate to think what that would do to your relationship.”

      Nina knew all about Reid’s dream of becoming a writer, how much it meant to him and how tenaciously he was pursuing it. It was his unshakable belief in himself, his utter certainty about what he wanted to do with his life that she most admired about him.

      “The last thing I want is for Reid to give up on becoming a writer,” Nina said. She smiled her thanks to the maid who’d silently removed her salad and replaced it with salmon. “But does he need to go to university to do that? And if he did quit to get a job, would it have to be such a poor one? Couldn’t he work for Mr. Robertson and write on the side?”

      Exactly what kind of work Reid might do for his father, Nina had only a vague idea. The Robertson family had made their money several generations ago in the mining industry and now were diversified into many areas including property development and light manufacturing.

      “Those two men!” Serena shook her head with an exasperated sigh and a conspiratorial smile that suggested she and Nina were allies. “These days they’re like a couple of bull moose butting antlers in the forest. Reid is determined to be independent. Reginald point-blank refuses to give Reid a job if he quits university to get married. Not that Reid expects or even wants to work for his father but he would do it for the baby. If his father would agree, which he won’t. Nor will Reginald give Reid any money to continue university if he marries. So you see, my dear, Reid is damned if he does and damned if he doesn’t.”

      “I’ll go away,” Nina blurted. “I’ll have the baby on my own. When Reid’s finished studying we can be together.”

      Even as she said it, she wondered how she would manage. Her father had lost his job as a longshoreman and his unemployment benefits had run out. Leo’s pride prevented him from applying for welfare and Nina had inherited the same stubborn conviction that a person should support herself. The family couldn’t live on what her mother made cleaning houses; they’d been counting on Nina finding a job and bringing in income. That was before she got pregnant.

      “My dear, you know Reid,” Serena said, her smooth, confiding tone honeyed with a mother’s indulgent smile. “With his strong sense of responsibility—quite remarkable in someone so young—he would never allow you to do that.”

      What she said was true, Nina realized. Reid would put her and the baby first, even if it was to his disadvantage.

      “Please don’t think it’s you Reginald and I object to,” Serena went on. “Or your family. It’s just that you and Reid are so young. You’ve got your whole lives ahead of you. But if you and he marry and have a baby…” She trailed away, having already painted Nina a bleak picture of the future.

      Serena was right. It would be a disaster for Reid. The last thing she wanted was to hold him back, or worse, have him hate and resent her. And she didn’t think she could raise her baby without him. Nina put down her knife and fork, too sick at heart to eat any more of the exquisite food.

      “But what can I do?” Nina said. “It’s too late for me to have an abortion. And I wouldn’t want to, anyway.” She was only four months along but already she had a fierce love for her little sweetpea.

      With a sympathetic smile, Serena reached across the table and placed a manicured hand atop Nina’s. “There’s a lovely couple in our sailing club, Jim and Elaine Hocking. They’re a little older and can’t have children of their own. Your mother knows them—she cleans their house. Jim and Elaine would give your baby a warm, loving home with every advantage.”

      Surrounded by fine china and old silver, with the scent of roses wafting through the open window on the warm breeze, Nina began to cry. She thought about her situation and knew she wanted the best for her baby. And she knew, too, that that was something she couldn’t give.

      Still feeling a gentle pressure on her fingers, Nina swallowed. Then she heard her name spoken, bringing her back to the present. It was Dora who was squeezing her hand.

      “With all my heart I wish your father and I had been able to talk you out of giving up your baby,” Dora said. “If only you’d accepted Reid’s proposal—”

      “Marrying СКАЧАТЬ