Flashman and the Mountain of Light. George Fraser MacDonald

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СКАЧАТЬ they, though? George, I ain’t puffing myself, but I’m not unknown over there! Man alive, when we had a garrison in Lahore, in ’42, I was being trumpeted all over the shop! Why, you said yourself the fewer who knew Iflassman was back, the better! They know I’m a soldier, don’t they – Bloody Lance, and all that rot?’

      ‘So they may,’ says he blandly. ‘But who’s to say ye haven’t been eating your dinner in Middle Temple Hall these three years past? If Hardinge sends ye, accredited and under seal, they’re not going to doubt ye. Ye can pick up the jargon, and as much law as ye’ll need, from those.’ He indicated the books.

      ‘But where’s the point? A real lawyer can spin the thing out ten times better than I can! Calcutta’s full of ’em –’

      ‘But they can’t speak Punjabi. They can’t be my eyes and ears in Lahore Fort. They can’t take the pulse in that viper’s nest of intrigue. They’re not politicals trained by Sekundar Burnes. And if the grip comes’ – He tapped his desk triumphantly – ‘they can’t turn themselves into a Khye-Keen or Barukzai jezzailchi and slip back over the Sutlej.’

      So I was to be a spy – in that den of devilment! I sat appalled, stammering out the first objection that came to mind.

      ‘And a fat chance I’ll have of doing that, with my face shaved!’ He waved it aside.

      ‘Ye cannot go to Lahore with soldier written all over ye. Forbye, it’ll never come to disguise, or anything desperate. You’ll be a British diplomat, the Governor-General’s envoy, and immune.’

      So was McNaghten, I wanted to holler, so was Burnes, so were Connolly and Stoddart and Uncle Tom Cobleigh, it’s on their bloody tombstones. And then he unveiled the full horror of the thing.

      ‘That immunity will enable you to remain in Lahore after the war has begun … supposing it does. And that is when your real work will begin.’

      And I’d exchanged a staff billet for this. The prospect was fit to make me puke – but I daren’t say so, not to Broadfoot. Somehow I contained my emotion, assumed a ruptured frown, and said surely a diplomat would be expelled, or confined at least.

      ‘Not for a moment.’ Oh, he had it all pat, blast him. ‘From the day you arrive in Lahore – and thereafter, whatever befalls – ye’ll be the most courted man in the Punjab. It’s this way: there’s a war party, and a peace party, and the Khalsa, and the panch committees that control it, and a faction that wants us to take the Punjab, and a faction that wants us driven from India altogether, and some that hop from one side to t’other, and cabals and cliques that don’t ken what they want because they’re too drunk and debauched to think.’ He leaned forward, all eager red whiskers, his eyes huge behind the bottle lenses. ‘But they all want to be on the right side at the finish, and most have wit enough to see that that will be our side. Oh, they’ll shift and swither and plot, and ye’ll be approached (discreetly) with more hints and ploys and assurances of good will than ye can count. From enemies who’ll be friends tomorrow – and vice versa. All of which ye’ll transmit secretly to me.’ He sat back, well pleased with himself, while I kept a straight face with my bowels in my boots. ‘That’s the marrow of the business. Now, for your more particular information …’

      He brought out a sheaf of those slim buff packets that I remembered from Burnes’s office at Kabul. I knew what they held: maps, names, places, reports and summaries, laws and customs, biographies and artists’ sketches, heights and distances, history, geography, even weights and measures – all that years of intelligence and espionage had gathered about the Punjab, to be digested and returned. ‘When ye’ve studied these, and the law books, we’ll talk at more length,’ says he, and asked if I had any observations.

      I could have made a few, but what was the use? I was sunk – through my own folly, as usual. If I hadn’t thumped that randy baggage Madison, I’d never have overheard Gough and rushed rejoicing into this hellish political stew … it didn’t bear thinking of. All I could do was show willing, for my precious credit’s sake, so I asked him who the friends and enemies in Lahore were likely to be.

      ‘If I knew that, ye wouldn’t be going. Oh, I ken who our professed sympathisers and ill-willers are at the moment – but where they’ll stand next week …? Take Goolab Singh, Soochet’s fugitive heir – he’s sworn that if the Khalsa marches, he’ll stand by us … well, perhaps he will, in the hope that we’ll confirm him in Kashmir. But if the Khalsa were to give us a wee set-back – where would Goolab and his hillmen be then, eh? Loyal … or thinking about the loot of Delhi?’

      I could see where Flashy would be – stranded in Lahore among the raging heathen. I knew better than to ask him what other politicals and trusted agents would be on hand, so I went round about. ‘How shall I report to you – through the vakil?’^fn6

      ‘No such thing – he’s a native, and not a sure one. He can take any letters ye may write about the Soochet legacy, but anything secret will be in cypher notes, which you’ll leave in Second Thessalonians on the bedside table in your quarters –’

      ‘Second where?’

      He looked at me as though I’d farted. ‘In your Bible, man!’ You could see him wondering if my bedside reading wasn’t more likely to be Tom and Jerry. ‘The cypher, and coding instructions, are in the packets. Your messages will be … collected, never fear.’

      So there was a trusted messenger at the Court – and the fact that I wasn’t to be told who was another thought to chill my blood: what you don’t know you can’t tell if inquisitive folk approach you with hot irons … ‘What if I need to get word to you quickly? I mean, if the Khalsa march, all of a sudden –’

      ‘I’ll ken that before you do. What you must discover then is why they’ve marched. Who set them on, and for what purpose? If it’s war … what’s behind it, and how came it to begin? That’s what I must know.’ He hunched forward again, intent. ‘Ye see, Flashy … to know precisely why your enemy is making war, what he hopes to gain and fears to lose … is to be half way to winning. Mind that.’

      Looking back, I can say it made good sense, though I was in no state to appreciate it then. But I nodded dutifully, with that grim attentive mien which I’ve learned to wear while scheming frantically how to slide out from under.

      ‘This Soochet legacy, then – it’s all gammon?’

      ‘By no means. It’s your excuse for being in Lahore, to be sure – as their subtler folk will suspect – but it’s still a genuine cause¹⁵ which ye’ll argue with their officials. Perhaps even in full durbar with the regents, if they’re sober. In which case, keep your wits about you. Jawaheer’s a frightened degenerate weakling, and Maharani Jeendan seems set on destroying herself by vicious indulgence …’ He paused, fingering his beard, while I perked up a trifle, like Prince Whatsisname. He went on, frowning:

      ‘I’m not sure about her, though. She had rare spirit and ability once, or she’d never have climbed from the stews to the throne. Aye, courage, too – d’ye know how she once quelled a mob of her mutinous soldiery, and them bent on slaughter?’

      I said I’d no notion, and waited breathless.

      ‘She danced. Aye, put on veils and castanets and danced them daft, and they went home like sheep.’ Broadfoot shook his head in admiration, no doubt wishing he’d been there. ‘Practising her trade – she danced in the Amritsar brothels as a child, before she caught Runjeet’s fancy.’ СКАЧАТЬ