Wholly Phool. :Peter-James :Mitchell

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СКАЧАТЬ should I pay attention to the silly little things I notice in life. Like my very own perception that there is some strange anomaly upon a google earth map, that I would be moved enough by it to go to the effort to do a strenuous two day bush walk to satisfy my curiosity and then now find myself in a mind-scape that has me a little overwhelmed to be honest, but at the same time excited by the implications that those few cryptic words have upon all that which is being carried in my endlessly busy mind.

      The dreams of this morning, the stumble across the overhanging cave like camp spot, the noticing of the old shirt against the back wall, the finding of the bit of paper and those few words were now eating into my mind and developing tendrils of relevance to things I have been thinking for years. Relevance to mechanics of psychology I have read and pondered but have yet to piece together as a bigger picture.

      Even though I had yet dedicated much focus upon trying to figure out the words of the message, their arrival into my awareness, there having been delivered as a form to be absorbed by my unconscious mind was beginning to make me observe that by themselves these few words were affecting into me and I was naming it all my Hunch Hunch.

      This hunch hunch was becoming something in me, it was clothed in the few words -Find it All in the Shadows- Its developing tendrils of relevance were seeming to me to be like some mystical golden thread which had arrived to magically sew together beads for a necklace. The beads were the isolated ponders of other hunches I had experienced over my many years of pondering my own mind, and the symbol of necklace was the coming full circle with a set of ideas that all joined together and may be worn as some thing I could know and speak. Symbolically the necklace is placed upon the throat region of the body, and it is symbolically from the throat region comes our voice, and the necklace is something that is worn to decorate, to highlight, and to symbolize.

      This small phrase which had turned up seemed to display a very real form of some sort of mystical plant that was now growing in my mind and its growing tendrils displaying a momentum beyond my conscious input. It seemed to be a motivating force responsible for the selection of notions that I was consuming in my contemplation process.

      Every new thought that was now arriving I was wondering if it was being sent to me from that which was the motivation of where the tendrils were wanting to grow where they were wanting to go and which notions they were choosing to sew together.

      My imagination was racing and I began being surrounded by new meta-rational notions - is the wholeness of that which I am an aware aspect of, can it be something that I may possibly fully know. I pondered that if I were a muscle cell in the calf of a particular human body could I conceive of that which I was a one fifty trillionth of. If I were a microbe on an elephants anus could I know about the herd he or she was a social member of. So was it in fact the wholeness aspect of that which I am but an aspect of, seeking to have my conscious awareness know of ?

      My mental journeys into various bodies of wisdom was always with the intent of curiously needing to know more about that which was needing to know more about. The whole mystical realm of self reflection is indeed a realm like any realm, it is both good and bad, useful and useless, potentially enlightening for those who dare but also potentially a vivid journey into madness, delusion, isolation and for some suicide.

      The wholeness of any particular cosmos is essential for it to continue to grow in balance, in harmony, in purpose, in meaning. But reductionism, fragmentation, becoming lost in the parts, becoming separated from the bigger picture of the wholeness of the particular cosmos will have it fall apart. It is sort of like its being aware of its wholeness is that which ultimately holds together its wholeness. Maybe that is the process our entire whirled world soap opera of our collective human comedy is coming to terms with. Maybe that is what was unfolding for me as a consequence to my daring to follow a wild fancy, may be I am suffering some sort of delusion was going on in my tweedle-verse or maybe I was being propelled into my wholeness by that which I had found in a dirty old abandoned pocket.

      This is the sort of ponders that were whirling through my mind, that which my captive meditation walk home was generating. Then I started pondering into other notion generators that I had experienced over the years.

      I had over thirty years ago been a proud owner of a floatation tank, a sensory deprivation device which was described as a cheap western trick in the blah that came with it. I enjoyed over 200 hours floating in those days and the capacity of it being a notion generator was being reminded to me now, the capacity of it being a very useful window to look into ones own inner infinity was an other aspect of its multi-faceted usury.

      I had also enjoyed the experience of an other notion generator, a Vipassana meditation retreat where for ten days one is led through a meditation technique, sitting, as well as slow focused walking, no eye contact, no speaking with the others. The captivity presents the emission of trapped notions that need to be thought out, to get out.

      So as you may see my familiarity with the meditation contemplation process had been with me for decades.

      I was feeling like I was in possession of something big, something that at one level isn't really anything but the mutterings of some bloke who dared to ponder into his own mind. But for me and how my mind works this new revelation process activated, motivated, authenticated by the unfolding s of wild fancy had become something big for me. Although once I was to get back to home and back to the normal swing of life there is probably nobody really that will appreciate the enormity of what had now come to exist in my own personal mind-scape. A strange and funny way to be in the world where you can talk about the weather, and the flow of life’s happenings with all those others we share life with, but at your very core, in the very light of your own inner beingness in the living now time an ongoing, never ending tweedle-verse of contentious war was going on.

      So not only have I a flow of “what ifs” also the “yes buts” move them aside and become warriors standing off against each other. The bickering’s of my Tweedledee and Tweedledum mind-scape is a very real and ongoing fabric upon which the entirety of life’s unfolding s is cast against.

      The living dynamics of ones own mind-scape is a gymnasium for thinking about thinking, thinking about how one thinks about thinking about thinking. Limitless spirals of self same ponders in dynamic tensions of attraction and repulsion, right and wrong, possible and impossible, good and evil, love and hate.

      It is this very perception that the meta-physical model of the universe suggested by the horoscope had indicated to me. That the twelve signs of the zodiac that we are all familiar with from our magazines and newspapers were in fact in reality a set of six signs of polarized dualities in a state of ongoing gendered warring contentions.

      It would seem that the actual mysterious life force behind every living form was due to the conflict of warring between the gendered nature of the entire universe. By virtue of anything being manifested it owed its existence to being no longer in a state of is, an ex-is-ness and by virtue of no longer being in a state of “is” it requires to participate in a tension. The tension all things exist with is the tension between the past and the future, past tense, future tense. The tension between expressing as yin feminine or yang masculine, the tension between expressing as negative or positive, the tension of being revealed by light or being hidden by shadow, the tension between our expressing with the common good of all, or an expression of vane, selfish greed, disharmony and all that is anti-life, evil in fact. Our entire universe from this perspective is a set of dynamic warring tensions.

      My mind seemed to be excitedly equipped with a new force, a new set of relevance tendrils that were taking on a life of their own, things were coming from my archives of stored memories from my now thirty five years of serious ponder into all things that looked into the mystery of life and creation. In a word the genre of ponder I was most interested СКАЧАТЬ