Christmas in Evergreen. Nancy Naigle

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      Ryan Bellamy was thankful his in-laws were still so involved in his daughter’s life. He was lucky they only lived a couple of hours away. Telling them about the change in plans for Christmas this year had made him nervous, but he couldn’t bear another Christmas like last year.

      He was determined to make this one as opposite as possible from that.

      His in-laws had been understanding about him wanting to take Zoe away, rearranging their schedule to spend time with her at the beginning of her school break instead of on Christmas Day, as had been tradition since Zoe was just a baby.

      It was hard for them all, going through Christmas without Sarah.

      The two-hour drive to pick up Zoe had made him melancholy. The house had seemed so quiet without Zoe around the last few days.

      The thirty-minute ferry ride flew by. He’d daydreamed it away in what seemed like only a moment. He jogged to his car and waited to disembark.

      Once he got back on the road, he returned calls, using the Bluetooth so he could keep both hands on the wheel. It had too noisy with the wind to do that on the ferry. He glanced at the speedometer on the rental car. He’d set the cruise control, but these small towns’ speed limits going up and down always kept him on his toes.

      Finally, he made it to his in-laws’ house. Panic swept through him as memories from past Christmases ascended on him.

      He hadn’t even taken his key from the ignition when Zoe bounded out of the house, running toward him. She’d missed him, too. He jumped out of the car, picked her up, and swung her around. Zoe made his heart complete. He shared quick thank-yous and goodbyes with his in-laws, then got right back on the road.

      He skipped the ferry and went the long way around. This Christmas would be like no other, starting right now. No ferry ride.

      That was the plan, and he’d make one hundred percent certain he succeeded. Zoe deserved a happy holiday, and he was going to be sure she got it.

      The roads were clear as they drove through the Vermont woods. Snow covered everything else around them. The trees bowed from the weight on their branches, and every once in a while, a pile of snow fell like a mini-avalanche.

      Zoe sat quietly in the backseat. He was happy to have her within arms’ reach again.

      His phone rang, and he took the call. No matter how much he planned for time off, he always ended up slammed with calls the whole first day he tried to get out of town. Not a single call he’d returned earlier that day had been urgent, and he had a doctor covering for him for anything that was.

      He heard a quiet sigh from the backseat. She had to be getting bored.

      Maybe he’d have been better off letting Zoe field his calls like she’d offered. She seemed to be eight going on twenty-eight most days. Then again, losing a parent at her age had a way of making a kid grow up faster than they should have to.

      More often than not, Zoe handled his wife’s passing better than him.

      “I gotta go,” Ryan said into the phone. This wasn’t how he’d planned to start this trip. He’d pictured this ride full of laughter and Christmas carols. Time to fix that. “Christmas calls. Bye.” He pressed the button on his Bluetooth to hang up. “Sorry.” He made eye contact with Zoe in the rearview mirror. “Last work call.” He laughed, trying to be playful. “I promise.”

      “You said that after the last one,” Zoe reminded him.

      Busted. He had said that.

      “And the one before that, and the one before that.”

      “Whoa. Okay.” He sighed. She was right. He was terrible at unplugging from work. “Hey, Zoe. Now I’m officially on vacation. Just you and me off to Florida and our big cruise on Christmas Day. Won’t that be fun?”

      “Sure. We can have fun in Florida,” Zoe said, but he could tell she wasn’t completely sold on the idea yet. “I mean, Christmas is supposed to be cold with snow, but…”

      But? “According to who?”

      “Santa!” Zoe looked at him matter-of-factly. “That’s why he wears a suit.”

      A mental picture of Santa in a pair of red-and-white, furry beach britches made him chuckle. “Aaah. You know, I didn’t know that.” Ryan wasn’t too worried about Zoe’s lack of excitement about the trip to Florida. He was sure she’d have fun once they got there.

      It was hard breaking tradition, but there was no way he was going to allow those old family memories to haunt them the way they had last year. That was just too hard. His heart couldn’t bear wallowing in that sad place again this year. But worse than the heartbreak of losing Sarah had been seeing Zoe struggle with that loss. They’d been so close, always working on projects together. They’d even had matching outfits and had gone for mother-daughter spa days.

      Those were voids he’d never be able to fill. Anything he could do to make things better, he’d do, and being as far away from a traditional Christmas as he could possibly get was the plan for this year.

      He regretted being on the phone for part of the ride so far. He hadn’t meant for that to happen. He’d do better. No more calls, and his New Year’s resolution was going to be to find better life balance to score more quality time with Zoe. They needed to start building new, good memories of their own together.

      “But how about this?” Ryan reasoned with her. “Tell you what. When we get there, as soon as we get into our hotel, we will crank up the air conditioning really high, and we’ll fill the pool with ice, and it’ll be just like living in the North Pole.”

      Zoe rolled her eyes, looking at him like he’d flat-out lost his mind, but at least she was laughing. “Oh, Dad.”

      Okay, so it was doubtful the resort would let him turn one of their swimming pools into an artic adventure, but it was the thought that counted. Right?

      On the bright side, they had a few days to enjoy Florida before the cruise left port. They’d do some warm weather shopping and visit a couple of attractions. As much СКАЧАТЬ