Unworried. Dr. Gregory Popcak

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СКАЧАТЬ something in your nervous system is misfiring. The more you ignore this simple biological fact and instead try to control all the outside factors that might be causing the anxiety, the more anxious and out of control you will feel. Because you are ignoring the real cause of your anxiety, the unnecessary or disproportionate triggering of your autonomic fear response, any attempts to “fix” the problem by trying to control your external world will simply backfire. First, remind yourself that having a legitimate concern about X does not mean that X is an imminent threat, and then refocus on getting this fear-threat system back under control. You will be able to consciously and intentionally restore a sense of peace and confidence.

      At first, with any of these exercises, depending on the intensity of your experience and how long you have been suffering from anxiety, it might take up to fifteen to twenty minutes of concentrated effort to get yourself back under control. With consistent practice, however, you can reduce this time to mere seconds.

      The point is, anxiety — unlike fear — is not a reaction to your environment. Anxiety may be triggered by context, but it is caused by a misfiring of the autonomic nervous system (the combined speed-up/slow-down nervous systems). Because of this, your best hope for reclaiming a sense of peace is to focus primarily on getting control of your body rather than your environment.

       Step Three: Respond

      The final step in the Relabel-Reattribute-Respond process is addressing the situation that triggered the misfiring of your fear-threat system. Again, just because your anxiety wasn’t strictly caused by something outside of you doesn’t mean there isn’t a real problem to deal with. It’s just to say that the particular stressor shouldn’t be producing the kind of intense, fearful panic usually reserved for an imminent, physical threat.

      Now that in step 2 you successfully reattributed your experience of anxiety as a misfiring of your fear-threat system and used several of the suggestions you read above to get your fear-threat system back under control, you’re ready to do something productive about the situation that inadvertently triggered the misfiring of your fear-threat system.

      When you are stuck in an anxious response, you can’t effectively problem-solve. You can only react to a problem, which will probably cause you to do something impulsive that can only make things worse. But if you take the time to calm your body down, turn off your fear-based reactive brain, and turn on your thinking brain, you will be in a much better place to respond to the specific event that triggered your anxiety.

      The key is “think small.” In fact, the smaller the better. You might not be able to identify the “one big solution” to the problem of your un-supportive marriage, but you can place a call to a marriage therapist right now. You might not be able to figure out how to not prevent your antagonistic boss from firing you, but you can ask yourself how you could do your absolute best on the next step of the project you are working on and write down some ideas, or you could even get your resume together and start looking for a different position. If you can’t think of even the smallest change you could make to affect the problem, then at least ask yourself how you could take a little better care of yourself. Perhaps you could take a walk, call a friend, pray, or do something you enjoy, even for a few minutes.

      One of the chief antidotes to anxiety is thoughtful, productive action as opposed to the “chicken-with-your-head-cut-off” reaction that occurs before you have gotten your body under control. If you can convince yourself to make even a small change that helps you respond more effectively to the problem or improves your mood, you will feel more powerful. When you make yourself pursue even a tiny change, you’ll be surprised at how little it actually takes to regain a sense of power in your life, and how much of an impact this sense of personal power has on helping you overcome anxiety.

      This three-step process of Relabel-Reattribute-Respond is a simple but powerful way to begin to master those feelings of anxiety that threaten to master you. Begin practicing these tools today. Even if they don’t take away all of the anxiety you feel, they will decrease your overall emotional temperature and help you use the more sophisticated anxiety-busting techniques we will discuss in future chapters. You will be taking some of the first, important steps down the road to a life without anxiety.

      Exercise: Relabel, Reattribute, Respond

      Directions: Use the following exercise for any situation that causes you anxiety.

       1. Relabel.

       Identify a situation that causes you anxiety. Write it in your notebook.

       Does this situation represent an imminent threat (not a potential, future threat) to your health or safety? Yes or No?

       If YES, your fear response is legitimate. Do what you must to escape the situation.

       If NO, then you probably need to respond to this situation rather than react to it. Proceed to step 2.

       2. Reattribute.

       The situation itself may or may not be serious, but your emotional reaction is probably disproportionate. Your emotional reaction is caused not by the situation, but by the fact that the situation has hijacked your fear-threat system. DO NOT respond to the situation at this time. Focus on getting control of your body by doing any/all of the following.

       Intentionally slow your rate of speech. Let you mind catch up with your mouth. Slow down until you have eliminated all “um’s” and “ah’s” and can speak what you are thinking calmly, thoughtfully, and without hesitation.

       Deliberately slow down your actions. Focus on what you are doing. If your mind is racing ahead to the next activity, bring it back. No matter how mundane the current task is (i.e., reaching for a glass, walking through a room) focus your mind totally on what you are doing in this moment.

       Breathe. Use the four-seven-eight breathing technique described in this chapter. Repeat for at least five minutes or until the anxiety decreases or passes.

       Pray. Concentrate on specific times you have felt God’s love. Remember times when God delivered you from difficulties. Thank him for these times. Praise him for his constant love and providence. Ask him for the grace to believe that he is right here for you in this moment in the same way, loving you, providing for you, and delivering you just as he always has.

       Make connection. Is there someone who could give you a hug? Go to them. Don’t talk about your problem … yet. Just tell them you are feeling out of sorts and need some help pulling yourself together. Relax into the hug. Focus on matching their breathing. Sync your body to theirs. If possible, stay in the hug until you find yourself exhaling spontaneously. That lets you know your “calm down” nervous system is fully engaged.

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