Addy's Redemption: A Novel. Juliana Ormsby

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      Mary … sweet little Mary … had Addy’s dark brown hair, hazel eyes, and fair complexion. There was something ethereal about Mary. Delicate and sensitive, she loved nature and had an amazingly compassionate heart for such a young girl. Addy hoped wolves would not mistake Mary’s sweetness for weakness.

      All the children were tall for their ages, and that was another thing that surprised Addy. Lionel was on the shorter side, and Addy herself was only 5 feet 3 inches. Everything about her children was wonderful: each was attractive, smart, considerate, and seemingly well adjusted. Who knows what the future held for them. How could they grow up with a father like Lionel and not end up on the psychiatrist’s couch? Was having a dad like Lionel better than having no dad at all?

      After her near drowning experience at Sound View, Addy promised herself that if she were ever a mother, she would make sure her children learned to swim. She watched her three fish frolicking in the waves and felt more at peace than she had in years. When was the last time she enjoyed her children with such abandon without worrying about what Lionel would do next? Her chest tightened when he came to mind, but she wanted to embrace new experiences and promised herself to squelch all thoughts of him during the vacation. It would be difficult, but she resolved to keep her vow to herself. After all, an opportunity like this may never come along again.

      The sun was setting, but the kids were still in the water. Addy called to them, asking if they were ready to go home. “NOT YET,” they shouted. She could hear the unfamiliar ring of freedom, joy, and harmless defiance in their voices. Soon enough, the children got cold and ran shivering to the blanket, quickly wrapping themselves in their beach towels. Addy gave them each a spritz of mosquito repellant, they gathered their things, and started down the wooden walkway. Addy could tell the kids had had a good workout in the water because they strolled at a pace she could match.

      “How stupid of me not to bring a flashlight,” Addy chided herself as they stumbled along to the parking lot in the dark. The warm glow of the cottages dotting their route home lit a flicker of security and hope in her heart. These sweet dwellings seemed oblivious to any pain or sadness. They glimmered with unquestioning confidence that life has infinite goodness to offer.

      When they reached the house, Addy and the kids all huddled together under the spray of the outdoor shower. Warm water in a beach shower … what a treat. Addy shuddered while recalling the torture of the freezing cold water of the outdoor showers at Sound View Beach slapping against her little sunburned body. Because the mean landlady strictly forbade sandy and dripping wet kids inside the cottages, Addy had no choice but to endure this suffering. That was the only unpleasant memory she had of that place.

      When the children and she went inside, Addy had the kids take warm showers and change into their pajamas straightaway. She rinsed out their suits, hanging them on the clothesline in the lovely backyard. Addy wished she could have a clothesline at her own home, but they lived in the suburbs, where outdoor clotheslines were unpopular. She remembered how fresh the sheets used to smell when she was a little girl growing up at her aunts’ house. Addy had never even seen a clothes dryer. Maybe some rich people owned them, but all the families in her neighborhood hung their wash outside. She remembered her aunts even going out into the winter snow to hang the clothing and linens. Sometimes everything would be stiff as boards when Addy helped pick the wash off the line. They would bring the clothes inside and thaw them near the radiators. At the time, Addy was irritated that her aunts hung the sheets outside even in the winter, but now she finally understood: fresh air at all costs.

      It was nearly nine o’clock, and they had not had dinner yet. The kids were starving. Just as Addy planned, she lined up paper plates and plastic cutlery, bread, cold cuts, cheese, tomatoes, lettuce, mustard, and mayonnaise on the kitchen counter. She had small bags of State Line potato chips, a Massachusetts-made treat loved throughout New England. She had brought a tin of her homemade chocolate chip cookies for dessert.

      The kids rushed through the cafeteria-style line, assembling their sandwiches, then climbed up on the counter stools to feast. They laughed and joked, even talking with their mouths full. Addy sat alone at the dining room table with her chair turned to face the children. When had she ever seen them this happy at dinnertime? It was nearly eleven o’clock when they finished eating, and the kids could barely stay awake to brush their teeth. Addy tucked in Mary first, who whispered a spontaneous little prayer, “Thank you, God, for this vacation.” Addy felt the same. When she got to the boys’ room, they were already fast asleep.

      Addy retired to her “suite” to get ready for bed. At first, it felt so unnatural to be using another woman’s bathroom. She could not help peeking in some of the vanity drawers; in one, she found packages of rubbers and some petroleum jelly. Hmm … the O’Malleys practiced birth control. Then, her heart sank as she imagined what it must be like to make sweet love with your husband instead of tolerating barbaric violation. From all the women’s magazines Addy had read, she understood that some couples enjoyed lovemaking well into the later years of their marriage. In fact, the magazines had begun to provide “tips” on how to remain attractive for your husband and please him in the bedroom. For a split second, Addy thought, maybe Lionel cheats because I am no longer appealing. She immediately scolded herself, not only for thinking of Lionel while on her vacation, but also for conjuring up such stupid thoughts. He had treated her in the same way ever since their honeymoon when she was still young and maybe pretty. After her bath, Addy was too tired to read or even think much. She pulled back the covers of the huge bed, hugged her pillow, and fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

      The weather remained perfect for the first three days of their vacation, and they spent each carefree day at the beach, even bringing a picnic lunch with them one day. As she watched the children dig in the sand, collect shells, and make sandcastles, she recalled her own happy days at the seashore. Had she and the children died and gone to Heaven? Every day was peaceful and filled with joy. She dared not count their remaining days of freedom.

      That evening as the children played Sorry! and Addy read her well-worn copy of a collection of the works of Jane Austen, strains of Bach’s “Brandenburg Concerto No. 5,” one of Addy’s favorite pieces of music, drifted through the sun porch windows.

      She looked up from her book, curious to see from where the music was coming. Addy caught a glimpse of the man in the cottage next door. He was sitting alone on his porch, reading a newspaper. She had never noticed him before and quickly brushed aside the image of his beautiful profile with the thought that his wife must be inside.

      Something about the aura of this man stayed with Addy as she bathed and prepared for bed that night. He was, from what Addy could see, breathlessly handsome … the kind of man that could marry any woman he chose, and he had probably done just that. Addy imagined a striking, slender blonde waiting for him inside the cottage. How are some women so lucky?

      After this first glimpse of the man, Addy kept looking over at his house or on the beach to see if she could spy him once more. She never noticed him on the beach, but one evening, she saw him sitting alone on his porch as he had done that first night. On Thursday of their first week, it started to rain. The kids grumbled, but Addy suspected they were actually relieved to get a break from the hot sun. New Englanders, fully aware of the long, cold winter ahead, dare not squander a sunny day at the beach. Yet, sunburned bodies secretly crave clouds and rain. Because they did not have to rush out to the beach that morning, Addy fussed with eggs and bacon for breakfast. They had barely finished eating when someone knocked on their door. The children looked wide-eyed at one another, trying to imagine who it could be. After all, they knew no one in Maine.

      

       Chapter V

      

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