Ezoosmos. Anastasia Novykh
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Eugene’s sleepiness immediately vanished. He started wriggling strongly, attempting to free himself of the unexpected captivity. With each movement the “pillow” under his head was becoming further lower as if it was sinking. Moreover, something little and tickling started to creep all over Eugene’s face and neck, and to bite his body parts aggressively without distinction. As soon as the guy, with his hands tied, managed to tear off the mask which had appeared on his eyes during his sweet sleep no one knew from where, and to unzip his sleeping-bag, he saw the total horror of the situation. The sleeping-bag in the foot area was corded with a rope tied in such an intricate knot which was got further more tightened with each movement of the body. The rope itself was attached to a thick bough of “the best tree on the forest meadow”, while his head appeared to be leaning against a big ant hill. Endeavoring to free himself, Eugene had involuntarily scattered the upper part of the hill, and hordes of tiny warriors immediately rushed to attack the offender of their house. The guy started to wave his tied hands, trying to flap away his “yesterday’s allies”, but thus he only worsened his “tickling state”.
In silence of the dormant nature there resounded round oaths assigned for those who had hit upon such a joke. The voice of a “roaring bear” alarmed the entire camp like a sudden banshee. Drowsy guys with eyes crazy of the unexpected interruption of their sleep leaped out of their tents and cars. Meanwhile Eugene was attempting to unshackle himself, showing fair slipping-out mastery and demonstrating the power of his pumped abdomen. His thoughts were strenuously oriented to the special operations group members whom he suspected of the trick. Who else could fasten such wrecker knots so professionally? It surely couldn’t be the priest. And it could hardly be anyone of Sensei’s disciples, because there were completely different people and totally different relations among them.
Oddly so say, the special operations group was the first to come to Eugene’s rescue. His liberation was accompanied with such wild emotions from both sides that all other campers gathered on the meadow. Nikolai Andreevich and Sensei came up as well. Later Vano joined, strangely having a much fresher appearance than everybody other. For Sensei it was quite enough to glance at his childhood friend to clearly see what had happened. He smiled, gravely sighed, shook his head reproachfully and turned his eyes away. While Eugene like a koala bear was taken down the tree, and Volodya was jestingly convincing that his guys had nothing to do with the trick, everybody completely woke up. Most interestingly, it was five a.m. sharp, i.e. exactly the “getting-up time” promised by Father John the day before. Vano hurried to laugh off with a joke that it’s a mere random coincidence.
When the general fuss had abated, and everyone got occupied with one’s morning toilet, to his great surprise, in addition to all the “pleasures” of his awakening, Eugene discovered granulated sugar in his “sweet drowse” (his sleeping-bag). And, all of a sudden, it dawned upon him who had been the author and the performer of the cruel plan, of the abrupt impingement upon his precious person. Not hesitating for even a minute, with his arms put akimbo, Eugene resolutely approached Vano who was squatting down on the river bank at that moment, adjusting his fishing tackle. Remembering his last day’s flight well enough, to be on the safe side, Eugene stopped at a certain distance from the priest.
“So, it’s you?! It’s been you who has arranged a “sweet morning” for me!” Eugene shouted accusatorily as if he was a public prosecutor.
“I listen to you attentively, son,” Father John uttered with his inimitable smile.
“How could you?! I’ve recognized my guilt, I’ve honestly and industriously washed off my “sins”, where as you!.. These are ants, man! They are predators! What if they’d wormed into my ears or my nose?! They could.., they could…” Eugene wasn’t able to find appropriate words to express his indignation. “Eat my brain!”
“Brain?!” Father John wondered and genially added, “Don’t grieve, my son, nothing like this may threaten you. And, as for the sins washing-off…” a merry zest gleamed in Vano’s eyes. “Well, if you insist…”
“Me?! I…”
Eugene didn’t even have time to blather in response when Father John adroitly caught the guy’s waving hand and easily threw him over in the air, applying fighting aikido elements. At that, he managed to flip Eugene’s body in such a way that it flew off to the water couple meters from the bank. The guy fell down into the river heavily like a weighty sack, accompanying his drop not only splashes, but with whole fluvial “tsunami”. When Eugene emerged in horror, his first exclamation was, “What for?!”
Father John grinned and answered as of nothing had happened, “You see, son, I’ve returned the favor, too. I’ve washed you clean with the holy water from feet to head.”
“Inquisitor! Souls’ oppressor! But the water is so cold. It’s like in hell here…”
“In hell?! It is such a trifle compared to the real hell. You cannot even imagine what some of such floundering “waterfowls” will face there…” Father John started frightening the company with his black humor.
The entire scene made all spectators laugh, while Sensei was looking at the stirred water from the steep bank and shaking his head, “These saboteurs have scared away the very last fish. Apology for such fishermen…”
The morning turned out to be marvelous. The weather was nice and quiet. Everything would have been perfect, except for the fact big fish wasn’t biting as before. Oddly to say, Father John sat on the bank to fish together with Eugene, although they kept teasing each other all the time. To put it more precisely, Father John set to fish while Eugene started assisting him, pinning fishing “delicacies” onto the fish-hook. The guy got so imbued with this occupation that he even showed a remarkable creativeness in it, having brought dozens of various beetles, little spiders and slippery grubs from the forest. They used everything possible to lure the fish, lavishly throwing the bait into the water, however the result remained unchanged. Only small fish was biting. Willy-nilly, they indeed arranged a whole eating festival for the fish, having overfed it with the most exquisite forest dainties. In the end, Eugene and Father John performed a ceremonial “absolution” for all the caught little fish. They delivered an edifying speech to the fish on how not get caught in the future, in case the fish would come across hooks filled with free bait, as well as on how the fish was supposed to earn its living through hard work. Then, accompanied by Eugene’s festive piping of some merry song, they set the little fish free, having thrown them back into the river.
Having lost interest in fishing, Eugene and Father John began to make up practical jokes to be played on other the fishermen and totally worn out the entire company. Once they got bothered with this as well, they started chaffing each other, practicing composing of new jests. Naturally, Father John particularly excelled in inventiveness. Owing to his efforts, Eugene was finding ants in his sandwiches and other food during the entire day. In general, despite their “interpersonal opposition”, they completely supplemented each other. Sensei even jokingly nicknamed them “the two halves of Aesop’s soul”. The ancient Greek cracked slave fabulist would have probably been ineffably surprised in his VI century B.C., if somebody had told him about such an unexpected reincarnation СКАЧАТЬ