If Ever I Fall: A gripping, emotional story with a heart-breaking twist. S.D. Robertson

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СКАЧАТЬ my days and nights by light and dark, enjoying the shades in between; not worrying about exactitudes.’

      ‘Does that mean there are no clocks at all here?’

      ‘Only those I couldn’t remove. There are two in the kitchen, for example: on the microwave and the oven, but they’ve never been set.’

      I want to quiz him further about this bizarre arrangement, but then I remember the woman in red.

      ‘Who was that I saw outside?’ I ask.

      ‘Outside? When?’

      ‘A moment ago. The woman in the red coat. I saw her from my bedroom window.’

      ‘Really? I didn’t notice anyone out there. Are you sure?’

      I don’t know what to say. Moments ago I saw Miles looking straight at her. I’m convinced of this fact. But rather than accuse him of lying, with no evidence to back it up, I brush past him and through the front door. ‘Follow me. I’ll show you.’

      I stride out of the house, trying to ignore the biting wind. I’m expecting to spot the woman right away, but she’s nowhere to be seen. I pace up and down, scanning the clifftop in all directions. There’s no sign of her whatsoever, which is weird. It makes me panic that she might have fallen over the edge. I run forward, scouring the line of the rickety fence and the sea below, focusing on the area where I last spotted her. But there’s no sign of anything untoward. It’s like she was never there.

      A concerned Miles catches up to me and clamps a firm hand on my shoulder. ‘Are you all right, Jack? What’s going on?’

      ‘I definitely saw her from my bedroom window. She was over there. I don’t know why you’re pretending she wasn’t. I saw you look straight at her.’

      ‘I’m sorry, Jack, but I didn’t see any woman. I promise you that. Hardly anyone ever comes up here. I’m not sure what’s going on. Maybe your mind’s playing tricks on you. It could be something to do with the head injury. Come on. Let’s get you away from the edge.’

      ‘You don’t even have a watch?’ I ask Miles later, once he’s talked me back inside and plonked me down in front of a cup of coffee in the kitchen.

      He shakes his head. ‘No need.’

      ‘What about your mobile phone? There must be a clock on there.’

      ‘I don’t have one. You’ll notice very little technology around here. Only essential appliances: a couple of radios and CD players. There are no televisions or computers.’

      ‘You’re joking, right?’

      ‘I’m not. I don’t want them. It’s liberating to be free from their grasp. I can’t believe how much time I used to spend staring at a screen. TVs, computers, they’re all the same: soul vacuums. I don’t miss them one bit.’

      ‘What about me? Don’t I have a watch?’

      Miles wrinkles his nose and sucks air in through his teeth. ‘Um, no. Not any more. That was one of the conditions of you moving in here.’

      ‘What do you mean?’

      ‘I didn’t force it upon you. You agreed.’

      ‘Agreed to what?’

      ‘To drop it over the cliff into the sea. We made a bit of a ceremony of it on the night you moved in. We had had a lot to drink. Don’t worry, it wasn’t a Rolex or anything. It was just a basic digital watch.’

      ‘Hang on a minute. Is that what also happened to my mobile?’

      Miles nods. ‘Sorry. I probably should have made that clear last time, but I didn’t want to overwhelm you with too much information at that stage.’

      ‘So I willingly dropped them both into the sea? You have to be kidding.’

      He shrugs. ‘House rules.’

      ‘And my wallet?’

      ‘What about it?’

      ‘I don’t seem to have one of those either.’

      ‘Oh, right. I see. Really? I’m sorry, but I don’t know anything about that. It’s not something we ever discussed.’

      He looks genuinely puzzled, but it’s not like I know him well enough to read him.

      ‘I must have had to spend money at some point while I’ve been here.’

      Miles shakes his head. ‘Like I told you before, you work for your bed and board. There’s no money involved in our arrangement. Never has been.’

      ‘What about in the pub? You said we met there.’

      ‘That’s right.’

      ‘And? How do I buy drinks?’

      ‘You don’t. We only go occasionally and, when we do, I pay. That’s also part of the deal.’

      ‘Really. What about the first time?’

      ‘Yes, you probably bought some drinks then. It was a while ago. I can’t remember the ins and outs. Listen, what are you getting at? Are you trying to suggest I’ve stolen your wallet?’

      The thought has crossed my mind, but I don’t want him to know that. Not at this stage. ‘No, don’t be stupid. It seems strange I don’t have one, that’s all. I thought it might give me some more information about myself.’

      ‘You seem very suspicious today, Jack. I appreciate how frustrating your amnesia must be, but remember, I’m not your enemy. All I’m trying to do is help you.’

      I nod, as if in agreement, but the truth is I don’t know what to believe. How can I when my whole life is a void? I’ve no frame of reference for anything.

      Did I imagine the woman in red? That’s certainly the simplest explanation. And yet she seemed so real. My head’s a mess. Nothing makes any sense. I need help – and I’m not sure Miles is the best person to provide it.

       CHAPTER 6

       Thursday, 6 April 2017

      Dear Sam,

      Back again, as promised. So I was telling you how Rick and I had picked up the girls from school together, wasn’t I?

      We agreed that Rick would follow me back home in his car – a white Mercedes. Ruby and Anna wanted to travel together, so I said they could ride in the back with me. Bad decision, as it turned out. Their chatter combined with my giddy feelings about Rick meant I wasn’t paying as much attention as I should have been. Next thing I knew, I was slamming my foot on the brake to avoid a boy who darted into the road after his football. Luckily I didn’t hit him and Rick stopped short of rear-ending me, thus avoiding a total disaster. But it was a close СКАЧАТЬ