Crazy Little Thing Called Love: The perfect laugh out loud romantic comedy you won’t be able to put down. Charlotte Butterfield

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СКАЧАТЬ you were expected to laugh. She’d got really shirty with her last week when Leila had turned down yet another offer of warm wine and stilted speed-dating chat in a Mexican restaurant.

      ‘Andy sounds charming.’ Leila replied from the back seat. ‘But the whole point of a man-ban is to ban men, not sleep with them.’

      ‘Who mentioned anything about sleeping with them? But you’re only doing this because you’re lonely, and I’m just pointing out someone to stop you being lonely, that’s all.’

      ‘Is that what you think? That I’m just trying to fill my time before the next man comes into my life? Oh my God Alex, you’re so annoying.’ After fifteen years of having Alex as her brother-in-law, Leila felt justified in speaking to him the same way she would her own brother. ‘That just shows your complete lack of depth and understanding of women. I am doing this year – a whole year – to prove to myself and everyone else that I do not need to be attached to someone else to be happy.’

      ‘There’s no way you’re going to last a year. How long has it been so far?’

      ‘Forty-one days.’

      ‘So on day forty-one of three hundred and sixty-five you’re still going strong. By day one hundred you’ll be doing the walk of shame from someone like Andy’s house. Five grand says so.’

      ‘I haven’t got five grand.’

      ‘According to you, you’re not going to need it. So take the bet.’

      ‘Fine.’ Leila said, ignoring her sister’s clucks of disapproval from the passenger seat. ‘I’ll take your bet, and raise you five.’

      Alex accelerated down the motorway. ‘Game on. Leila, Game on.’

      The next day, Judy had just cleared away the remains of the sticky toffee pudding and placed the tray with coffee, and Lucy’s peppermint tea, in the middle of the table when Marcus gave a little cough. ‘Um, everyone,’ he placed his hand on top of Lucy’s. ‘We have some news.’

      Everyone jumped up from the table and loud declarations of ‘Congratulations!’ ‘Fantastic news!’ were exclaimed amid a flurry of hugs and kisses. Leila caught Tasha’s warning eyes over Marcus’s shoulder, as if she was going to drop in the middle of her congratulations mention of his fiancée’s frostiness.

      ‘Where’s the ring?’ Judy asked excitedly.

      Marcus looked a little uncomfortable, but Lucy didn’t flinch, ‘It wasn’t exactly to my taste, so Marcus took it back and we’re going ring shopping together this week to get something more suitable.’

      ‘Bigger.’ Leila mouthed to Tasha across the table.

      ‘Oh, well, that’s nice.’ Judy said. It was very obvious to Leila and Tasha that their mother did not in fact think that was nice. In fact, her words of platitude were so fake, she may well have said, ‘you made my son return the ring he painstakingly chose for you, you selfish, greedy mare.’

      Tasha hurriedly butted in. ‘So, any ideas for the wedding?’

      Again, Marcus shifted uneasily in his seat, ‘Um, well actually, Mum, Dad, we wondered if we could have it here?’ Since the refurbishment three years previously, the hotel had been featured in all the wedding magazines as a must-visit location, and they had a booming bookings book filled with brides and grooms-to-be eager to celebrate their nuptials in the oak-beamed dining hall. The outdoor terrace, built into the hillside, enjoyed panoramic vistas over the harbour and River Dart below and was the perfect spot for pre-dinner Pimms and a jazz band.

      ‘That would be wonderful!’ Thomas said, ‘We’d be delighted to have it here!’ We’ve got a lot of weekends left after October, or a couple in June next year if you want better weather, so let us know soon what dates you were thinking of.’

      ‘July 1st this year,’ Lucy said.

      Judy laughed, ‘Oh, this summer is completely chocka, I’m afraid, and that’s only six weeks away! But I think we do have a weekend in September and then, like Thomas said, most after October?’

      ‘No, we definitely want July 1st this year.’

      ‘But that’s a Saturday! We can certainly do a midweek wedding in July if you fancy it though? But I don’t see what the rush is? It would be nice to take your time over planning it, rather than doing it all in a rush? Oh! Unless you’re pregnant?’

      Leila and Tasha cringed at their mother’s lack of subtlety, but Lucy didn’t flinch, ‘No, I’m not pregnant Judy, but neither of us are getting any younger, particularly Marcus, so we don’t see the point in dragging it out unnecessarily.’

      ‘And we definitely want a Saturday Mum, there’ll be people travelling all over for it, and midweek wouldn’t work,’ Marcus added.

      ‘I’m sure you can shuffle some things around for us Judy? It is your son’s wedding day after all.’ Lucy’s smile made Leila itchy. The table had lost its joviality of a few minutes before and everyone’s eyes were darting between Lucy and Judy and Thomas to see who would talk first.

      ‘Let me look in the book, and we’ll see what can be done.’ Judy replied with a pinched smile.

      This was absurd. ‘You can’t cancel someone’s wedding just because Marcus has decided to get married then!’ Leila heard herself exclaim. ‘Those people had booked it last year, or the one before!’

      Judy flashed warning eyes at her youngest daughter, while maintaining her slightly twitchy composure and smile. ‘I didn’t say I was going to cancel someone’s wedding, just to see what could be done. Maybe we could ask a couple to move to the Sheldrake, or the Winbourne, but let’s look in the book first shall we?’

      Lucy clapped her hands together, ‘Oh this is so exciting, how it’s all coming together! We’ll need to talk about menus Judy as soon as possible so that you can order in the ingredients, I want organic Welsh lamb for mains, and then for dessert…’

      Leila excused herself and carried the empty coffee cups into the kitchen. Thomas followed her carrying the milk jug and cafetiere. She rounded on him before he’d even put them down on the countertop. ‘Dad, you can’t just cancel someone’s wedding because Lucy has decided that’s the date she wants! It’s completely unethical and will damage your business! And you’re talking about a prime date in July – you’d be getting ten grand at least for that date, are you just going to give it to them for free?’

      ‘Calm down Leila, this all needs to be thought through before we make any decisions.’ Thomas started loading the dishwasher. ‘It’s all just been sprung on us and we don’t know any of the answers yet. No point getting all worked up. Pass me those plates there.’

      ‘Well don’t take too long, because I guarantee she’ll have the invites sent out by next weekend, that’s if she hasn’t done so already.’

      Her dad straightened up, ‘Why do you care so much Leila, you’ve never bothered about our bookings or business much before, why now?’

      ‘I just don’t want you and Mum to be completely walked over, that’s all!’

      ‘Feeling jealous is completely natural love, you’re what, thirty-four now?’

      ‘Thirty-two, СКАЧАТЬ