On Equal Terms. Catherine O'Connor

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СКАЧАТЬ least she had afforded them without relying on anyone’s help.

      ‘Your taste in fashion certainly has changed,’ Sebastian taunted.

      ‘I no longer need a label to give me an identity.’ Unlike some, she silently added, looking at his immaculate clothes quite deliberately.

      ‘I never did,’ he retorted briskly, putting Kate firmly in her place. ‘I just prefer quality,’ he continued.

      ‘Don’t we all, if we can afford it?’ she replied tartly. She glared at him with heartfelt malice, her hands in a tight knot under the untidy pile of clothes as she clasped them together, trying to control the tremors.

      ‘You have been given an allowance,’ Sebastian growled angrily. ‘A more than generous one,’ he added with vehemence.

      ‘I didn’t want to use that,’ she protested immediately. She suddenly felt defensive about her position, but couldn’t understand why. She wanted to be independent. Besides, somehow it seemed wrong to use that money in the circumstances. She had left home after refusing to attend a select finishing school. It had caused a terrible family row and she knew whose fault that was—Sebastian’s!

      ‘No, you wouldn’t want to use the money,’ he snapped, breaking into her thoughts. ‘My God, Kate, you really know how to hurt, don’t you?’ he snarled, his anger and bitterness spilling out.

      Kate’s head snapped back, her eyes molten pools of indignation. ‘I wouldn’t hurt anyone,’ she denied, cut deeply by his accusation, and troubled by it. Why would he think that was her motivation—was his opinion of her so low?

      ‘Never mind, I’ll soon have you looking your usual self.’ His sudden smile faded, as he picked up her thin blouse, holding the material between two of his slender fingers before dropping it back on to the bed.

      ‘I don’t want your charity!’ Kate retorted, her voice strangely hoarse. ‘I’m not even coming home,’ she added forcefully. She couldn’t face being with him and her emotions with regard to her father and stepmother were still in turmoil, though another bit of her wanted to be part of a family again.

      ‘Believe me, Kate, you are—and now!’ His lips widened to a dangerously sexy smile. Kate’s stomach contracted painfully at his words; his suggestion sounded more like a threat, and she immediately felt herself grow hot at his remark. He assumed that she was willing to fall meekly back into her former life. She would not go with him! She threw back her head, her fair hair tumbling over her slim shoulders in disarray. She stared up at him, her heart racing, but she presented a calm façade, refusing to let him see the havoc he was creating within her.

      ‘I’ve no intention of going home!’ she spat at him, hating him with all her heart

      ‘And I’ve no intention of leaving here without you!’ he bit back. He remained standing at the side of her bed, his hands placed firmly on his hips, pushing his tailored jacket back to reveal his hard chest, just visible beneath his white silk shirt. His expression was growing darker with every passing moment and the silence made Kate feel even more nervous. But she would not give in to him; it had taken her a long time to get over him and she wasn’t prepared to risk the pain of rejection again.

      ‘How did you know I was here?’ Kate asked, trying to stall for time as she thought of a way to escape from him.

      ‘A private detective…’ he barked back, as if he was aware of her tactic and was finding it all rather tiresome. ‘I had to find you,’ he said. The words hung in the air between them. She heard the steely edge in his voice and knew she was to take that as a warning.

      ‘Why?’ she came back, unable to control herself in the face of such arrogance and the growing suspicion that he was not being totally honest with her.

      ‘We can discuss that later, now let’s go home,’ he said with deceptive casualness. But his manner did not fool Kate. She knew him too well—knew that he was being evasive. Her determination to stand up to him wavered slightly as she recalled his formidable temper, but then the thought of going home failed her heart and mind, effectively blocking out her reservations about Sebastian. Yet what of her father—what was his view on all this? she wondered; it seemed strange that he had not come for her. Had he still not forgiven her, despite all her attempts to make amends?

      ‘Where’s my father?’

      It was a simple enough question but she noticed the almost indefinable change that instantly came over Sebastian. She waited for him to speak. A cloud of darkness passed through his eyes but it was quickly gone.

      ‘Does he know? Does he want me home?’ she asked, her voice a mixture of hope and desperation. How she wanted his answer to be in the affirmative.

      ‘Your sudden concern is heart-warming,’ Sebastian drawled cruelly. ‘Now get dressed, Kate.’ His voice was heavy with contempt as he spun away from the bed and marched back down the ward. Kate stared after him. She was hurt by his tone. Her head was throbbing and she suddenly felt drained. It had not been the reunion she had wanted. She felt cheated, angry and humiliated. She looked down at the bundle of clothes he had thrown on the bed and knew she had neither the energy nor inclination to fight him. Once dressed, she made her way slowly up the ward. Something was wrong, she could tell, something that Sebastian was not telling her. But she knew that to ask him would be pointless. He would only tell her when he wanted to. He turned around as he heard her approach, his eyes raking over her and a frown furrowing his brow.

      ‘You are all right, aren’t you?’ he asked, watching her closely. Kate matched his expression with a frown of her own. Was this genuine concern? she wondered. It was the first time he had shown any interest in her well-being.

      ‘I’ll be all right.’

      ‘Good,’ was his monosyllabic reply, and Kate could discern nothing from it. He took her hand in his, his grip tight and possessive, as if he did not trust her not to try and escape. Her pulse immediately began to race; his touch still excited her, even after all this time.

      Sebastian drove through the hectic traffic with his usual skill and speed and, within minutes, the city was being left behind. He exhaled noisily and shifted in his seat, and Kate saw him visibly begin to relax, yet she could still sense an underlying strain. The countryside was quiet; the roads, which in summer would be teeming with tourists, were completely empty. The green fields were varnished in a fine coating of frosty white rime and the trees stood stiffly erect, their slender branches like gnarled arms twisting upwards, reaching up into the sunless sky, stretching to find some heat The only sign of activity was a host of black crows lining the greying fences of the roadside, waiting to pick at any unfortunate rabbit that might have been hit by a car. Kate gave an involuntary shiver; the day was as dark and dismal as the desolation she felt in her heart. The atmosphere in the car didn’t help matters. It was strained; an invisible wall of resentment had been erected between them. The silence was so uncomfortable and fragile that she remained silent, gazing out of the window, her mind a flurry of emotions. Their last meeting had been far from harmonious and she wondered if he still remembered it. She did, so very clearly; she had secured herself a job and was leaving. She’d been determined to go but Sebastian had stopped her in the hall, making one last attempt to persuade her to stay.

      ‘Kate, stop it now,’ he had said firmly, taking the case from her hand and placing it on the floor as he’d continued, ‘It’s not what you want—what any of us want.’

      ‘What I want?’ she exclaimed in outrage. She was still hurting from the fact that she had not been informed СКАЧАТЬ