So I Have Thought of You: The Letters of Penelope Fitzgerald. Penelope Fitzgerald

Чтение книги онлайн.

СКАЧАТЬ novel, but I must try and finish it now, I daresay Collins (soon to move to Hammersmith as part of Murdoch’s economies) would let me put it off but I can’t bear it dragging on, though I feel myself getting stupider all the time. I felt quite grand flying to Edinburgh^** and eating the executive breakfast – orange juice, fruit salad, bacon and egg and hash-brown potatoes, roll butter and marmalade and a bran and raisin scone. Presumably to prevent constipation. Hermione Lee was very kind, although she clearly thinks I am hopeless about feminism, and says this is the generation gap – and Marina Warner not bad, she admits I taught her at the Westminster Tutors but says I made up her mind for her to give up her faith and she went straight to Westm: Cath. to make her last confession – I’m sure I didn’t. B.P. (patrons) gave us all a vast lunch at some hotel. The festival was in gaily striped tents and marquees which took up the whole of Charlotte Sq. – and Edinburgh did look nice in the sun and wind because they’ve had rain up there. I made the P.R. girl come on a bus trip round the city afterwards so we had to get quite a late flight. And now all the shuttle services are on strike because one of the hostesses has been accused of selling the free executive champagne to the tourist-class, of course they do! – Thursday I go down to the BBC to start these recordings but I don’t have to interview Anne Thwaite till next week.

      All this must sound more than dull when you are on the plage (do you remember the dear old French O-level papers with pictures?). Meanwhile I want to wish you a happy homecoming but won’t send you a YOUR NEW HOME card as the bungalow isn’t exactly that, but 10000 welcomes back, all my love to all of you –

      xxxxx Ma.

      

      You’re quite right about Sarah. You always make nice friends – the wild craftswoman-hairdresser at Weston was nice – but Sarah was someone in particular, and my word how she’ll miss you. I wonder what will happen to the Methodist Hall playgroup? But new times now and new places.

      Mary had an X-ray because of her constipation but as far as I can make out there is nothing to worry about. Must keep her off diets. There’s a new one, Bio-lite, which you take for a week and feel much lighter, – it’s been shown to consist of 95 per cent tapwater.

      

      [postcard: Millais’ ‘The Boyhood of Raleigh’]

      9 November [1989]

      

      Thought Lukey might like this, though Raleigh of course inferior to Drake. Went yesterday to help unveil plaque to Burne-Jones on grim flats built on site of his gracious home. Fish-paste sandwiches and white wine in local library, where mayor asks us to drink toast to Pre-Raphaelites remembering that they were all good socialists. Kind lady gets me cup of tea, but John Christian sportingly drinks toast. Off to Kirkby L. tomorrow, back Tuesday, Wednesday Iris arrives in London. Longing to see you all but M. tells me you’ve started teaching again, how can you manage and what would you like for Xmas

      will ring all my love Ma

      

       27a Bishop’s Road

       London, N6

      Sunday [1990]

      Dearest Tina,

      I was so cheered up when you rang, but felt furious with myself afterwards because (as always) I kept talking about all these unimportant problems of mine which aren’t really even problems, as they will solve themselves – but I didn’t like to ring back – however I really wanted to know about Kelly, and about your classes, and Luke’s (not Lukey’s, he was quite definite about that) school – as you left it, you were saying to me that it was most certainly something to remember all his life – a playground with the moors stretching away to the horizon in every direction – and he was getting on fine, but you wondered if there were any children there anywhere near his standard – and I wondered if that mattered to a child who was going to be outstanding anywhere, like Luke.

      Poor R. Dahl died (what of?) and there were TV pix of the Giant Peach, wh: made me think of Luke’s room, and his picture, with the teacher’s comments, which I’ve lain and looked at so often in the early morning.

      I also wanted to ask how dear P. was getting on, and whether Jemima still approved of the place wh: is privileged to look after her. But I never said anything about any of these things, nor do I expect you to answer them, but perhaps some time, at Christmas or after Christmas.

      Willie gave me such a beautiful picture of you (she tore it out of her album) taken when we went up to Yorkshire – you were younger than Jemima is now, but Thomas thought it was Jemima, and the expression is exactly the same – serious, but immensely hopeful –

      so much love to you all

      Ma

      

      [1990]

      [incomplete]

      

      …hasn’t sold any of the tickets at all, which is scarcely surprising considering he’s charging £37.50 for them. He says there are lavish refreshments, but who wants to go and eat lavish refreshments at Channings. Meanwhile I’m bracing myself up to tell Jeannie I’ll do some weeding (I’m never allowed to spray) as I’d much rather do that than go and sit in a hide on the reservoir waiting for spoonbills. When they were working they never used to do anything on their days off because they were so tired, and I think that that really suited me better.

      I’ve been listening to a sermon on the radio about preparation for dying, wh: he called the Last and Most Dreadful Journey of All, this is true of course but I do find it more than a bit depressing. Afterwards there was a Handel concerto, such a relief as he sounded as if he hadn’t a worry in the world, though I believe he had plenty.

      Kindly letter from Nan Talese at Doubleday saying that they are not doing too badly with the Gate of A. in spite of total ruin in the publishing industry and she would like to make arrangements about the next novel but alas there is no next novel.

      It was a treat for me to see Paschal’s school. I did not stare at him as that would not have done, but sitting at the other table I could see what he was doing and he worked so well and industriously and was enjoying it so much and enjoying doing it right, as of course children of that age do. It was quite hard work for them I thought but I suppose there are more recreations after lunch – much love to all Ma

      

      [postcard]

      [1990]

      Please let me prune the rose again this spring. Fertiliser also needed of course although honeysuckles never seem to need anything.

       27a Bishop’s Road

       London, N6 4HP

      Wednesday [c.1990/91]

      Dearest Tina –

      I love Hope Cottage, the green, the elms, the rooks, the view, the new cooker and everything about it, and had a wonderful 2 days and it was such a treat to be collected from Sheepwash,^* and to have Luke show me round Castle Drogo. How amazing he is Tina. I’d give so much to know what is in store for him. You and Terry were so patient during the difficult timeСКАЧАТЬ