Follow Your Dream. Patricia Burns

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СКАЧАТЬ till they arrived at the huge coach park behind the Golden Mile, their passengers happily drunk and ready for a good knees-up.

      As she approached her own street, Lillian slowed down. She had already cycled all the way along the seafront to Shoebury and back and she ought to turn in and go home. But at Sunny View there was Gran and a whole list of chores. She couldn’t face it. She hated her family and she hated doing chores. Past the top of her road she went, past the Kursaal with its fairground and its dance hall and its famous dome, along the Golden Mile and all the amusement arcades and finally under the pier and out the other side. Here she stopped at last and treated herself to an ice cream.

      She leaned on the rail at the edge of the promenade and looked down at the go-karts roaring round the speedway. The whiff of petrol and exhaust fumes set off a wave of longing.

      ‘Oh, James,’ she said with a sigh.

      She was missing him so much. He was a month into his basic training now, and it had seemed like the longest month of her life. Nothing was fun any more. Nobody cared. Even Janette was fed up with hearing her talk about him and refused to listen any more.

      ‘Why don’t you write to me?’ she said out loud.

      She still hoped against all logic that he would, but always she was sorely disappointed. She had to rely on Susan, begging her for news of her brother every time she came round to their house. Bob was often cross with her, telling her not to bother his girlfriend, but Susan was surprisingly nice.

      ‘He says he’s surviving it OK,’ she told Lillian. ‘He’s not letting the NCOs get him down.’

      Or, ‘He’s been square-bashing all week and he’s got blisters, but at least he knows his left from his right, which is more than some of them do.’

      Or, ‘He’s enjoying the rifle practice; he says he’s quite good at it.’

      Always he sent his regards to the Parker family. The family, not Lillian personally. It hurt every time.

      There was still another two weeks until he finished basic training and got a weekend pass. Would he call in at Sunny View? He had to. She couldn’t bear it if he was so close and she didn’t get to see him. A small cold voice of realism told her that he might well come to see Wendy. She gripped the handrail, growling with jealousy. It wasn’t fair! Why couldn’t she be beautiful like Wendy?

      Below her, the young men running the speedway showed off, jumping on the side bumpers of the cars driven by pretty girls and flirting with them. All these people enjoying themselves. For her, summer only meant more work to do at Sunny View. She finished her ice cream and sighed deeply. She didn’t want to go home, but staying here was only making her feel more fed up.

      She drew her eyes away from the speedway and looked at the pier pavilion with its theatre. A long banner advertised the summer show, with its singers and dancers. Dancers. An even deeper gloom settled on her. That was another thing. She was no nearer her dream of becoming a professional dancer. Then into her mind came something that James had said when they were discussing their futures.

      ‘It’s no good just waiting for fate to take its course; you have to do something yourself.’

      ‘I am,’ she had told him. ‘I practise every day.’

      ‘But that’s no use if nobody sees you but me and Janette. We’re not going to give you a job on the stage.’

      Lillian had flared up at that, and asked him what he was doing towards becoming the owner of a garage with a car of his own.

      ‘At the moment I’m learning all I can, not just how to fix cars, but how to run the business. There’s all sorts of things that could be done better where I work,’ he told her. ‘Then I’ll try to get into REME when I do my national service and get a bit more training there, and when I come out I’m going to start doing repair work for people on Sundays and evenings and build up a list of customers while I save up for equipment. Then I’ll rent a small place and work my way up.’

      Lillian had been very impressed. He really did have it all planned out. His was not just a dream, it was a real ambition. It made hers look like childish fantasy.

      As she thought of this, her eye was caught by a poster with a dancer on it fixed to the railings just along from where she was leaning. She moved over to read it better.

      Carnival Talent Contest—Children—Juniors—Adults—Big Prizes—Enter now!

      A bubble of excitement formed inside Lillian. This was it! This was her chance to show what she could do! She grabbed her bike and pedalled up the steep hill to the Carnival offices to get an entry form, then freewheeled back down again and headed for home, her head buzzing with ideas of what she might do.

      The moment she stepped in at the back door, she was in trouble. Bob was sitting at the kitchen table, studying for his banking exam.

      ‘Gran wants to see you,’ he said in a tone that made it sound like a threat.

      Her confident mood evaporated. It was as if a heavy cloak had fallen over her shoulders, weighing her down, smothering her. Lillian went along to the front room and knocked. Gran didn’t even call for her to come in, she opened the door herself.

      ‘Where on earth have you been? Why are you never here when you’re needed?’

      ‘I…I didn’t know…’ Lillian stammered.

      ‘That’s no excuse. Your mother’s ill or something—’ Gran managed to imply that the illness was minor and probably imaginary ‘—and the sheets need to go on number five. What if we want to let that and it’s not ready? Go and see to it straight away.’

      It was no use Lillian suggesting that someone else might have done it. Wendy was still at work; Frank was probably out, Bob was studying and of course Gran herself couldn’t do it. She was about to run upstairs when there was a ring at the front door. She hesitated. Usually she would have hurried to answer it, but Gran was just as near as she was and, as it was sure to be potential guests, she would want to look them over.

      ‘What are you standing there for?’ Gran demanded. ‘Go and answer it before they go away. We can’t afford to lose good money.’

      Lillian did as she was bid. Standing on the doorstep were a young couple with a cheap suitcase each. The girl looked very nervous. She was half hiding behind the man. Lillian knew immediately what their fate would be but, with Gran listening to what she was saying, she didn’t dare suggest politely that they tried elsewhere.

      ‘If you’d like to come in, I’ll just fetch the landlady,’ she told them, using the formula that Gran required.

      She put her head round Gran’s door again, informed her that there were guests to see her and set off to get the sheets out of the airing cupboard. As she went up the stairs, she heard Gran’s heavy footsteps crossing the hall floor and her icy voice.

      ‘Are you married?’

      The man answered, sounding offended. ‘Yeah, ’course we are.’

      ‘You don’t look like it. Where’s your wedding certificate?’

      ‘At home, ain’t it? We don’t carry it around with us,’ the man said.

      ‘I СКАЧАТЬ