Jeremiah. Stefan Zweig

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СКАЧАТЬ sinks to his knees] Here am I, Lord! Thy servant heareth. [Breathless he hearkens. Nothing stirs; he trembles with emotion] Speak, Lord, to thy servant. Thou didst call my name. Give me thy message that I may understand it. I am ready for thy word and await thy command. [He listens again with strained attention. Profound silence] Is it presumption that I should long for thee? I am no more than an ignorant fellow, a man of no account, a speck of dust in the world thou hast made, but thine is all power of choice. Thou who choosest kings from among shepherds, and who often unsealest the lips of a boy so that he glows with thy speech, thy choice is made by other tokens. Whom thou touchest, Lord, he is chosen; whom thou choosest, Lord, he is appointed. If it were thy call which came to me, lo I have hearkened to the call. If it be thou, Lord, who huntest me, I flee thee not. Seize thy quarry, Lord, seize thy prey; or hunt me yet farther to the goal! But make thyself known, that I may not fail thee; reveal the heaven of thy word, that I, thy servant, may behold thee!

      The Voice

      [Nearer and more urgent] Jeremiah!

      Jeremiah

      [Rapturously] I hear, Lord, I hear. With all my soul I listen to thy word. Unworthy vessel that I am, I wait to be filled with thy message. I vow myself to thy service, Lord, to thine alone, for my soul is athirst to serve thee. I await thy word and thy sign.

      The Voice of Jeremiah’s Mother

      [Now close at hand and plainly recognizable] Jeremiah!

      Jeremiah

      [In ecstasy] Show thyself to me, Lord; my heart is racked with the imminence of thy coming. Pour forth thy waters, holy storm; plough me up, that I may bear thy seed; make my earth fruitful, inspire my lips; brand me with the mark of thy service! Set thy yoke upon me. See, my neck is bowed in readiness, for thine am I, thine for evermore. Make thyself known to me, Lord, even as I know thee; let me but see thy glory, even as thou lookest down upon my unworthiness in the gloom; deign only to show me the way of thy will, point the way to him who is thy servant for ever!

      The Mother

      [Her search has led her up the stair; her countenance shows anxiety, her voice is full of tenderness] Here at last I find you, my son.

      Jeremiah

      [Springing to his feet in fear and wrath] Begone! Alas the voices are stilled; the way is lost, never shall I find it again.

      The Mother

      Woe is me, why do you stand here so thinly clad in the chill night air? Come down, my son. The morning mist brings fever.

      Jeremiah

      [Wildly] Why do you follow me, why do you pester me? Unending chase. You follow me without pause, waking or sleeping.

      The Mother

      Jeremiah, what do you mean? I was sleeping below, and then I seemed to hear people talking on the roof.

      Jeremiah

      You heard, you too? God’s holy truth! You heard him speak? Understood his call?

      The Mother

      Whom do you mean? You have no companion.

      Jeremiah

      [Seizing her arm] Mother, tell me I beseech you. Death or joy hangs upon your words. Did you hear a voice; did you hear it after you had awakened?

      The Mother

      I heard a voice on the roof and went to summon you. But your bed was cold and empty. Then fear came upon me, and I called your name.

      Jeremiah

      [Trembling] You called my name?

      The Mother

      Thrice did I call you. But why …

      Jeremiah

      Thrice? Mother, are you certain …

      The Mother

      Thrice did I call you.

      Jeremiah

      [His voice breaking] Disaster and derision! Fraud everywhere, without and within. There came an earnest call, and in my terror I thought it was God.

      The Mother

      How strange you are! I meant no harm. Since there was no answer, I came to the roof to see if there was anyone here. I found no one.

      Jeremiah

      Nay, you found a madman. The torture of these visions! Sense and nonsense join in cheating me. I am befooled by my own fantasy.

      The Mother

      What are you talking about? What is troubling you?

      Jeremiah

      Nothing, Mother, nothing. Pay no heed to my words.

      The Mother

      I must heed them, Jeremiah; but they are dark to me. An evil mood has beset you, and has estranged you from me. What has happened; what is tormenting you?

      Jeremiah

      Nothing is tormenting me, Mother. I was too hot in bed, and sought the roof for coolness.

      The Mother

      You are closing your heart to me, and yet I can read you. I know that night after night for months past you have been wandering about. I have often heard you groaning in your sleep. When you have left your bed to walk restlessly in the darkness, my heart has followed your every step. Tell me your troubles. Shut not yourself away from me.

      Jeremiah

      Do not concern yourself about it, Mother.

      The Mother

      How can I help but concern myself about it? Are you not the day of my days and the prayer of my nights? You have outgrown the arms which used to carry you; but I still hold you in my soul, which watches over your life. I knew, ere you yourself were aware; I saw months ago, before you yourself had seen. I saw the shadow upon your brow and the anguish of your soul. You have become a stranger to your friends; you shun merrymakings; you keep away from the marketplace and from the dwellings of men. Buried in thought, you renounce life. Jeremiah, bethink yourself. You were trained for the priesthood. Your father’s mantle awaits you, that you may praise the Lord with psaltery and song. Look forth from the darkness into the daylight. The hour has come for you to begin your life’s work.

      Jeremiah

      Not now the time for beginnings. The end draws nigh.

      The Mother

      It is time! It is time! Long since have you grown to manhood. The house has need of a wife, and of children to raise up seed to your father.

      Jeremiah

      [In СКАЧАТЬ