The Collected Plays of George Bernard Shaw - 60 Titles in One Edition (Illustrated Edition). GEORGE BERNARD SHAW

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      ACT II

       Table of Contents

      Midday. A roam in a Moorish castle. A divan seat runs round the dilapidated adobe walls, which are partly painted, partly faced with white tiles patterned in green and yellow. The ceiling is made up of little squares, painted in bright colors, with gilded edges, and ornamented with gilt knobs. On the cement floor are mattings, sheepskins, and leathern cushions with geometrical patterns on them. There is a tiny Moorish table in the middle; and at it a huge saddle, with saddle cloths of various colors, showing that the room is used by foreigners accustomed to chairs. Anyone sitting at the table in this seat would have the chief entrance, a large horseshoe arch, on his left, and another saddle seat between him and the arch; whilst, if susceptible to draughts, he would probably catch cold from a little Moorish door in the wall behind him to his right.

      Two or three of Brassbound’s men, overcome by the midday heat, sprawl supine on the floor, with their reefer coats under their heads, their knees uplifted, and their calves laid comfortably on the divan. Those who wear shirts have them open at the throat for greater coolness. Some have jerseys. All wear boots and belts, and have guns ready to their hands. One of them, lying with his head against the second saddle seat, wears what was once a fashionable white English yachting suit. He is evidently a pleasantly worthless young English gentleman gone to the bad, but retaining sufficient selfrespect to shave carefully and brush his hair, which is wearing thin, and does not seem to have been luxuriant even in its best days.

      The silence is broken only by the snores of the young gentleman, whose mouth has fallen open, until a few distant shots half waken him. He shuts his mouth convulsively, and opens his eyes sleepily. A door is violently kicked outside; and the voice of Drinkwater is heard raising urgent alarm.

      DRINKWATER. Wot ow! Wike ap there, will yr. Wike ap. (He rushes in through the horseshoe arch, hot and excited, and runs round, kicking the sleepers) Nah then. Git ap. Git ap, will yr, Kiddy Redbrook. (He gives the young qentleman a rude shove.)

      REDBOOK (sitting up). Stow that, will you. What’s amiss?

      DRINKWATER (disgusted). Wot’s amiss! Didn’t eah naow fawrin, I spowse.

      REDBROOK. No.

      DRINKWATER (sneering). Naow. Thort it sifer nort, didn’t yr?

      REDBROOK (with crisp intelligence). What! You’re running away, are you? (He springs up, crying) Look alive, Johnnies: there’s danger. Brandyfaced Jack’s on the run. (They spring up hastily, grasping their guns.)

      DRINKWATER. Dineger! Yuss: should think there wors dineger. It’s howver, thow, as it mowstly his baw the tawm YOU’RE awike. (They relapse into lassitude.) Waw wasn’t you on the look-aht to give us a end? Bin hattecked baw the Benny Seeras (Beni Siras), we ev, an ed to rawd for it pretty strite, too, aw teoll yr. Mawtzow is it: the bullet glawnst all rahnd is bloomin brisket. Brarsbahnd e dropt the Shike’s oss at six unnern fifty yawds. (Bustling them about) Nah then: git the plice ready for the British herristoracy, Lawd Ellam and Lidy Wineflete.

      REDBOOK. Lady faint, eh?

      DRINKWATER. Fynt! Not lawkly. Wornted to gow an talk, to the Benny Seeras: blaow me if she didn’t! huz wot we was frahtnd of. Tyin up Mawtzow’s wound, she is, like a bloomin orspittle nass. (Sir Howard, with a copious pagri on his white hat, enters through the horseshoe arch, followed by a couple of men supporting the wounded Marzo, who, weeping and terrorstricken by the prospect of death and of subsequent torments for which he is conscious of having eminently qualified himself, has his coat off and a bandage round his chest. One of his supporters is a blackbearded, thickset, slow, middleaged man with an air of damaged respectability, named — as it afterwards appears — Johnson. Lady Cicely walks beside Marzo. Redbrook, a little shamefaced, crosses the room to the opposite wall as far away as possible from the visitors. Drinkwater turns and receives them with jocular ceremony.) Weolcome to Brarsbahnd Cawstl, Sr Ahrd an lidy. This eah is the corfee and commercial room.

      Sir Howard goes to the table and sits on the saddle, rather exhausted. Lady Cicely comes to Drinkwater.

      LADY CICELY. Where is Marzo’s bed?

      DRINKWATER. Is bed, lidy? Weoll: e ynt petickler, lidy. E ez is chawce of henny flegstown agin thet wall.

      They deposit Marzo on the flags against the wall close to the little door. He groans. Johnson phlegmatically leaves him and joins Redbrook.

      LADY CICELY. But you can’t leave him there in that state.

      DRINKWATER. Ow: e’s hall rawt. (Strolling up callously to Marzo) You’re hall rawt, ynt yer, Mawtzow? (Marzo whimpers.) Corse y’aw.

      LADY CICELY (to Sir Howard). Did you ever see such a helpless lot of poor creatures? (She makes for the little door.)

      DRINKWATER. Eah! (He runs to the door and places himself before it.) Where mawt yr lidyship be gowin?

      LADY CICELY. I’m going through every room in this castle to find a proper place to put that man. And now I’ll tell you where YOU’RE going. You’re going to get some water for Marzo, who is very thirsty. And then, when I’ve chosen a room for him, you’re going to make a bed for him there.

      DRINKWATER (sarcastically). Ow! Henny ather little suvvice? Mike yrseolf at owm, y’ knaow, lidy.

      LADY СКАЧАТЬ