Maya - Illusion. Owen Jones

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СКАЧАТЬ to save their marriage.

      After a few moments, Lek pulled away, “I am sorry, Craig, but it is no good getting close and crying. Something has to be done and if I am going to go away, this is not helping either of us. You understand why I must do this and I understand that you cannot help me.

      “I will leave in two days. Do you want me to move out now?”

      “No, no, not yet, Lek... I think that you ought to at least tell me the costs and the shortfall. I have never asked you because you always seemed to have everything in hand and now you hit me with this! Or do you actually want to go?”

      “I do not lie to you, my husband, but it is true that I do not, or have not always told you the truth one hundred percent. I tried to many times, maybe every time in the beginning, but the language was between us and … well, it was easier not to.

      “When I worked in Daddy’s Hobby, I did lots of things that I did not want to do because I had to do them. I do not want to say any more about that unless you ask me and that is your right, I think.

      “Anyway, I saved some money for Soom’s education. Goong also left me 500,000 Baht when she died four or five years ago. I gave some of it to her family, but kept most of it.

      “I don’t have much of it left now. I was bored here for years with nothing to do and gambled a lot of it away on cards. I paid Soom’s university fees last year and I have supplemented the money that you gave me for food for several years.

      “Now, I cannot pay Soom’s university fees when they come up next year and cannot buy her the clothes, books and laptop that she needs right now to be comfortable with her studies. I don’t want her to look poor in university! She is the first person in my family to go to university and I want to give her every chance.

      “That may mean losing you... but I will do it, if I have to, my darling, because I don’t know what else I can do.”

      A few tears escaped her eyes, but she quickly wiped them away with her hand.

      Craig was looking down at the beautifully-tiled floor, feeling like a total failure.

      “So, you have paid the fees for now, right?” he said not meeting her eyes. “When do you need more money for Soom?”

      “About six months. I pay university fees two times a year, but I give Soom money for her room and living every month.”

      “So you have six months?”

      “No, I must start working now to give Soom money every month and then more fees in six months. If I wait, it is too late.”

      “OK, Lek... I wish that you had brought this up before, but, please give me a few hours to think about the problem, before you do anything quickly. Let’s say that you have... two weeks, eh? Can you wait two weeks?”

      Lek nodded and put her hand on his shoulder, “Sure, I can wait two weeks.”

      Craig was still shell-shocked. He put his hand to hers and patted it a few times, slowly. “I wish you had told me your problem before, Lek, I really do. Now, it’s hurry, hurry, hurry, but thanks for... Er, well, we have two weeks, eh? … What are your plans for today?”

      “It has taken me days to say this... I don’t have any plans now. Do you?”

      “No, but I know that right now, work is not the answer... Why don’t you go off to your mother’s and I’ll have a think?”

      Lek was glad of the excuse to get out and be alone, and, having recovered somewhat from the initial shock, so was Craig.

      After Lek had left, he finished his cold coffee in one, packed up his laptop and went to the shop where he did a lot of his thinking. The office was for slog work, but Nong’s shop was for deep cogitation, usually over a few ice-cold beers. Watching the people in the village coming and going, carrying out their daily lives had always had a calming, yet inspirational effect upon him.

      He sat down at the one table outside the shop and waited for Nong to notice him. He had been drinking at Nong’s shop for eight years, but they still could not talk to each other in any meaningful way. Nong appeared not to have an aptitude for English and Craig had spent most of his time trying to earn money rather than learn Thai.

      As he was staring out before himself, he heard Nong say, “Hello Mr. Craig, how are you today?” in Thai.

      “Sabaai dee, kap - I’m fine thanks. Khun duay, mai? You too?”

      “Yes, thank you. The beer is very cold today.”

      Nong always said that, but then the beer was always cold too.

      Craig slouched in the bench seat and stretched his feet out in front of himself. He thought with a smile, that if he smoked, this would be a two-pipe problem, as Sherlock Holmes would have said.

      “Why hadn’t she mentioned it before? Why the sudden crisis? The real bottom line was, if she believed in karma, as she insisted she did, why did she think that she could change her daughter’s karma?” It did not make sense now, although Lek’s news had hit him like a bullet.

      The problem was that Lek seemed to be sure that her only way forward was to go back to work in a bar. So, whether she was right or wrong in her religious philosophy, she would probably leave him in fourteen days.

      Craig knew that Lek had an iron will. If that was what she had said she would do, that was what she would do, unless there was a very good reason not to. And the only reason that was good enough was money, so he needed a supply of money.

      Or he needed to shed the chains that held him and Lek together – he needed to stop loving her.

      Money or love?

      That was the dilemma.

      Lek had already decided that she would choose money, although not for entirely selfish reasons. Selfishness was in there though, he was sure. He knew that she would not be able to bear the shame of having to withdraw Soom from university for lack of funds.

      Although that was the mechanics of the situation, it did not help his predicament. He loved Lek, but he was being offered an honourable way out. No-one would blame him for cutting and running now. Lek had told him that he was on his own.

      Craig wondered for a little while whether Lek was offering him this easy exit because she had found someone new, but he dismissed the idea as much for lack of evidence as the fact that it would have hurt him too much to countenance it. He believed that Lek was genuinely concerned about her daughter’s future and that helped him with the next choice, which was whether he should stay or go.

      That would take another beer. It was not that he didn’t want to stay. It was more a question of whether this problem would erupt again over an unrelated issue like Soom’s first home, Soom’s first car, Soom’s babies, when she had them, which she inevitably would. Soom had been brought up by her grandmother as had Lek and he knew that Lek was looking forward to the role in her turn.

      Craig, however, was not, yet the likelihood of it coming to pass was only three or four years away.

      Nong saw the empty bottle and swiftly brought another one.

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