Tears of the Renegade. Linda Howard

Чтение книги онлайн.

СКАЧАТЬ “Yes, I’ll be there.” Her voice sounded odd, she noted dimly, as if she hadn’t any strength.

      “I have some business to take care of tomorrow, so I can’t nail down an exact time when I’ll be there, but I will be there,” he promised.

      “Do you know where I live?”

      She could feel his lips curving in a smile. “Of course I know where you live. I made a point of finding out the day after I met you.”

      The song ended, and she automatically moved away from him, but his arm tightened around her waist. He grinned, his teeth flashing whitely in the darkness of his beard. “You’re going to have to shield me for a few more minutes.”

      A delicate rise of color tinted her cheeks. “We shouldn’t dance. That would only…prolong the situation.”

      “We’ll find a corner to stand in.” A twinkle danced in the glittering depths of his eyes. “We’ll have to stand; I’m incapable of sitting down right now.”

      She felt her blush deepen, and he chuckled as he moved with her to the edge of the room. She was aware deep inside herself that her heightened color wasn’t from embarrassment, but from a primal excitement. She wasn’t shocked that he was aroused; she was proud!

      He positioned himself with his back to everyone else, his broad shoulders effectively blocking her view of the room. His eyes roamed slowly, intently over her face, as if he were trying to read something in the serenity of her expression. “Did you come with Preston?” he asked abruptly.

      “Yes.” Suddenly she wanted to launch into an explanation of why she was there in Preston’s company, but she left the words unsaid and let her simple reply stand on its own. Preston was her brother-in-law, and she was fond of him; she wouldn’t apologize for being with him.

      The magnetic power of Cord’s eyes was frightening; tiny prisms of light seemed caught in them, holding her gaze captive. Her breath caught in her throat and hung there, swelling her lungs, as she waited for him to release her from his spell. “Am I horning in between you and Preston?” he finally asked in not much more than a whisper. “Are you involved with him?”

      The breath that she’d been holding was released on her soft answer. “No.”

      A smile lifted one corner of his hard mouth. “Good. I just wanted to know if I have any competition. It wouldn’t stop me, but I like to know what I’m up against.”

      No, he didn’t have any competition—in any sense. He stood out like a cougar among sheep. The thought of him turning his single-minded attention on her was alarming, but at the same time, she already knew that she wouldn’t say the words necessary to turn him away. She knew that she should run like crazy, but her body refused to obey the dictates of common sense.

      A tiny frown flickered across his brow as he stared down at her, as if he had seen something that he hadn’t expected. He couldn’t be wary of her, or alarmed by her femininity; he had known far too many women for there to be any mysteries left for him. Perhaps he was surprised to find himself flirting with her, because she certainly wasn’t his type. Perhaps he was looking at her quiet face, her becoming but unspectacular dress, and wondering if he’d temporarily lost his mind. Then the frown was gone, and he smiled faintly as he brushed her cheek with the tips of his fingers. “Tomorrow, sweetheart.”

      “Yes.”

      Susan both dreaded and longed for the next day to arrive, but with outward calm and practiced self-discipline, she made it through the remainder of the evening with her usual dignity, chatted normally with Preston on the drive back home, and even went through her nightly routine without missing a beat. Once she was in bed, however, lying alone in the darkened room, she couldn’t keep her thoughts from swinging dizzily around Cord, picturing his saturnine face, his incredible lodestone eyes, the black beard that was as soft as a child’s hair.

      He had a black magic that went to her head like the finest champagne, but how could she be so foolish as to let herself be drawn into the whirlpool of his masculine charm? She’d be sucked so far under the dark waters that she’d have no control over herself or her life; she’d be his plaything, as other women had been, toys that interested him intensely for a short while before they were discarded in favor of a new and more intriguing amusement. Could she really let herself become one of his toys? She’d known real love with Vance, a love that had endowed their physical union with a deep and satisfying richness. Having known that, how could she settle for anything less?

      Her mind, her heart, the very core of her being—all said no. Her body, however, lying warm and quivering, yearning for the touch of his strong, lean hands, rebelled against the commonsense strictures of her mind. She was learning now how primitive and powerful desire could be, how disobedient the flesh could be to the demands of conscience. Her soft, feminine body had instinctively recognized the touch of a master, a man who knew far too many ways to bring pleasure to her.

      She lay awake for several long, tormented hours, but at last her quietly indomitable will won out over her fevered, longing body. She was not now, never had been, and never would be, the type to indulge in a shallow affair, no matter how physically attractive a man was. If he wanted her company for something other than sex, then she would be happy to be his friend, but the thought of sex without love was abhorrent to her. Making love with Vance had been spiritual and emotional, as well as physical, and her knowledge of the heights had left her dissatisfied with the lower peaks that could be scaled without love.

      Not once, during the dark hours, did she have any doubts about the nature of the relationship that Cord wanted with her. He’d told her bluntly that he wanted to make love to her; she sensed that he was always that honest about his desires. His honesty wasn’t the courageous openness of honor, but merely his lack of concern over what anyone else thought or had to say about him. He was already an outlaw; why worry about ruining his reputation further?

      If only the forbidden weren’t always so enticing! Her mind darted and leaped around his image, held so clearly in her memory. He was wickedly attractive; even talking to him gave her the sense of playing with fire. She had to admit that Cord had certainly captured her imagination, but it was nothing more than that, surely, except for his obvious physical charm. The ways of the wicked have always held a fascination for those who walk the bright and narrow path of morality.

      But that bright and narrow path was where she belonged, where life had placed her, where she was happy. The shadows where Cord Blackstone stood weren’t for her, no matter how intriguing the weary knowledge in his crystalline eyes.

      She slept little, but woke feeling calm and rested. Her inner surety of self often masked such physical weaknesses as tiredness or minor illness; her features might be pale, but there was always a certain calmness that overlay any signs of strain. It was Sunday, so she dressed and drove her eight-year-old blue Audi over to Blackstone House to attend church with Imogene and Preston, as she had always done. To her relief, Preston didn’t mention that Cord had been at the party the night before; he was too interested in relating to Imogene the details of William Gage’s infant political career. Susan commented little, entering the conversation only when she was addressed directly. She sat quietly through the church service, accepted Imogene’s invitation to lunch, and maintained her mood of strong reserve all through the meal. Her in-laws didn’t try to draw her out of her relative quiet; they had learned to accept her occasional silences as they accepted her smiles. Susan didn’t run to a comforting shoulder to unburden herself whenever something troubled her; they might never know what made her deep blue eyes so pensive, and they didn’t ask.

      They had just finished lunch and were moving into the den when Mrs. Robbins, the СКАЧАТЬ